


Traversing Golden Waters

by MonsegnorSnek



Series: Chibiness and Time Travel [1]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, BAMF Orochimaru (Naruto), BAMF Uzumaki Naruto, Broken Tsunade, Can you really redeem if you haven't done the deed yet?, Canon What Canon, Chibi Naruto with his Chibi legs, Crack, Don't Take This Too Seriously, Epilogue What Epilogue, Family Fluff, Fix-It, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fuuinjutsu as a surprise box, Gen, Hatake Kakashi is a Little Shit, Humor, I don't know what I'm doing, I'm in love with tagging, I'm trollin', Kurama is a Stressed Bijuu, Light Angst, Mama orochi, Minato's confused why this kid, Naruto will take care of y'all, Orochimaru Redemption, Orochimaru as a parent figure, Pre-Naruto Canon Era, Proud Orochimaru Marmalade, Sakumo don't touch that blade, Sakumo's wondering who's, Sannin as family, Second Shinobi War, Shut up Shukaku, Soft-hearted Jiraiya, Team as Family, This is all Big Kakashi's Fault, Time Travel, Uzumaki Naruto Is A Little Shit, Uzumaki Naruto is a Good Friend, Uzumaki Naruto will Give Hugs, Where are all the facts in the manga?!, causing havoc to Konoha and stressing, cute naruto, his Hokage-jiji, looks like him, no beta we die like Itachi, talk no jutsu, they see me rollin', this blond kid that's peppering him, with unexpected hugs and ramen, your Jinchuriki calls you Mother
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:53:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 29
Words: 52,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23465713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonsegnorSnek/pseuds/MonsegnorSnek
Summary: Orochimaru didn't know what hit him when he offered his cup of ramen to a dirty sunshine haired kid he encountered on his way home to Konoha.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi & Hatake Sakumo, Hatake Kakashi & Uzumaki Naruto, Hatake Sakumo & Uzumaki Naruto, Kyuubi | Nine-tails | Kurama & Uzumaki Naruto, Namikaze Minato & Uzumaki Naruto, Namikaze Minato/Uzumaki Kushina, Orochimaru & Uzumaki Naruto, Uzumaki Kushina & Uzumaki Naruto
Series: Chibiness and Time Travel [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1908004
Comments: 1619
Kudos: 4768
Collections: Emmikus best finds on ao3, Foxy fox 🦊, Rhyne's Chakra Coils, Storycatchers Best of Naruto pile, Team 7 🌀, why im sleep deprived 💖✨, wwwwwww, Руссо Туристо в англо-и-не-только-фиках





	1. Chapter 1

Tsunade always supported healthy eating. As a medic nin, she would persuade ~~threaten~~ her teammates on proper diet and healthy lifestyle. She would always beat up Jiraiya for not eating his vegetables and glared Orochimaru to death whenever she learned that he ate nothing for the whole day, _again_. It was quite funny how in the end, she didn't heed her own rules and gravitated towards an unhealthy obsession with sake.

Orochimaru sighed for the third time that day when he remembered how Jiraiya somehow messed up his storage scrolls. Instead of the things he packed up for his mission, what that imbecile toad replaced for his food reserve (which consists of tea, protein bars and some food pills) was a storage scroll that had tons of cup ramen, hashi, a gallon of water and a kettle.

It was one of Jiraiya's pettiest pranks after Orochimaru snitched him to Tsunade for not eating the stir fry vegetable she made specifically for Jiraiya's consumption. And that event happened years ago! That imbecile still remembered it! That petty bastar—

Orochimaru swore that when he got back to Konoha, Jiraiya would _pay_.

But, back to his current predicament. 

The Snake Sannin glared at the pile of cup ramen on top of a storage scroll and cursed the Toad Sannin for his childishness. 

He felt exhaustion and hunger overtaking him after his mission. It was an A-rank retrieval mission he took after his sensei told him that he needed a capable shinobi for this task and someone discreet enough to enter Kumogakure and retrieve back a scroll from the Raikage's secret archives without alerting anyone with his presence. A scroll that consisted of forbidden jutsu made by the Nidaime Hokage himself that was stolen from his body after his death from the Kumo shinobi.

Orochimaru's mission lasted him seven days and for the duration of the week, he once or twice have eaten in one of Kumo's open tea shop when he declined with fervor to not eat any of Jiraiya's blasted cup ramen. He must have been influenced by the Toad Sannin's dim-wittedness because he haven't had the mind to restock his supplies at Kumo and now that it has been two days since his last intake of solid food, Orochimaru is fighting the fact that he needed to eat.

It will take him just a day of travel to go back to Konoha but his body insisted that he needed to eat now or he will be sent to oblivion because of hunger and exhaustion. 

Swallowing his pride and dislike of instant noodles, Orochimaru decided that once he got back to the village, Jiraiya will dearly, _dearly_ pay for this.

He ran for another half an hour when he remembered a cave that the Sannin used to camp when they were just yet starting with their mission and found the location near the Land of Fire's boarder.

Orochimaru went inside the camp and gathered dried leaves to sit on. He built a fire to set water on a kettle and waited for it to boil. He took the chance to warm himself near the fire and retrieved a miso ramen from his storage scrolls when the water boiled.

Mentally cursing Jiraiya's whole existence, Orochimaru started eating his ramen.

He stopped at his first bite and cursed Jiraiya again. 

Orochimaru never had ramen before, because he believed that it was food for idiots, and it was really not that bad. _It wasn't_. And he won't tell Jiraiya that he instantly liked cup ramen at his first bite.

If cup ramen was this good, what of the real one?

He stopped at his mental ramblings and stiffen when he felt a presence near the cave. He paused eating and in a second, he threw a kunai at the direction where he felt the presence and was rewarded by a surprised squeak.

Orochimaru stood up from his position and readied himself from a fight when a _golden creature_ emerged from the bushes where he threw the kunai. 

"Hey! What was that for?!" The angry squeak of a child, waving Orochimaru's kunai, "didn't you know that throwing this thing is dangerous and you might harm someone, 'ttebayo!"

The small child continued his angry rant about 'shinobi randomly throwing their weapon like a paranoid freak' and Orochimaru was left blinking. He expected an ambush from an enemy nin but a small angry child was not in his list.

He stared at the child and noticed his distinct features. His skin was tanned due to the long exposure from the sun, his dirty blond hair was sticking in all direction, strange whisker mark on both of his cheeks and he was wearing a dirty pair of jumpsuit that was shaded in the most _obnoxious_ of orange. What intrigued him to the small child was when he caught a look at his eyes, it was _startlingly_ blue.

His eyes didn't belong to a small kid but to a hard jaded veteran of war.

Orochimaru was brought back to the years when Jiraiya left them for three years to spend his time with the orphans they saw at Ame. Orochimaru insisted in killing the three children but the soft-hearted fool argued with him how they didn't deserve that. Orochimaru felt that his explanation as to why they should kill the orphans was reasonable at that time but Jiraiya didn't listen to him and he was surprised that Tsunade agreed with Jiraiya. So, the imbecile of a Sannin left them for three orphans of war and when he came back to the village, he peppered Orochimaru with stories of how those three will be a great shinobi one day because of their potential.

This child must also be an orphan of war because no small kid like him would be seen freely gallivanting at this part of the country.

Looking at the blonde-haired kid, his eyes were very different to those Ame orphans. Yes, he looked as dirty as those three and as miserable as them but the look in his eyes. It was hard. Clear. _Determined_.

(And so, so _innocent_.) 

Orochimaru has seen those eyes before. When Tsunade wanted to prove that she will be the greatest kunoichi of her clan. When Jiraiya yelled how he will train hard to beat Orochimaru. And when Orochimaru once looked at the mirror when he was a child and told himself that he will prove everyone wrong about their claims of him. 

_This child_...

"— and what if it really was just a rabbit and not an enemy and you made a fool of yourself in front of your teammates and that _teme_ will call you paranoid—"

Orochimaru blinked to clear his musings and the child was still ranting but it was not about him anymore, it was about the 'teme always thought that he was so good than him' and he was very passionate about his words.

"— do you know understand my point, dattebayo?!" The child asked and stopped his flailing.

The Snake Sannin was left wondering what really was his point. But he held back his tongue before asking and just nodded. 

The child beamed at him and Orochimaru was struck at how _brilliant_ he was... 

Orochimaru let the sunshine-haired kid approached him and he watched what he was about to do. The kid unceremoniously took the Sannin's hand that twitched at the hold and he carefully placed the kunai at his palm.

The Snake Sannin was blinking at the absurdity of his situation, then he remembered his manners. 

"Thank you," he said at the kid, still confused at why and how this was happening.

"No problem, dattebayo— is that ramen?"

Orochimaru looked at what the kid was looking at and saw his cup ramen near the fire where he left it after he threw the kunai and went back to look at the blond, he nodded. 

"It's good, right?" The kid asked and he narrowed his eyes at Orochimaru.

"It is," he replied.

The kid's narrowed eyes assessed Orochimaru for something and when he found what he was looking for, the Snake Sannin was again rewarded with his blinding smile.

"Ramen's the best, dattebayo!" He energetically pumped his fist heavenwards but stopped when he seemingly remembered something, "oh, but I have to go!"

The small child waved at him and he watched the kid ran away from him. 

Orochimaru stared at the kid's back and noticed how thin he was.

_'He must've been hungry,_ ' he mused absent-mindedly.

And before he knew it, Orochimaru called out, "do you want some?"

His voice was not loud but the kid swiveled back to look at him, stars twinkling at his eyes. 

"Really?!"

Orochimaru nodded. 

"Thank you!" The kid yelled and ran back towards the entrance of the cave to stare back at him.

Orochimaru gestured at the direction of the fire and the kid excitedly nodded to sit near the fire. The Snake Sannin opened another cup ramen and put hot water in it before giving it to the boy. 

"Itadakimasu!" The boy clapped his hands.

The Sannin was about to ask why he wasn't eating when he noticed that the boy was waiting for him to eat first. With a quiet 'itadakimasu' in Orochimaru's part, the kid immediately dug in.

Orochimaru watched the boy eat the food with gusto and he wondered if this was what Jiraiya felt like when he fed those Ame orphans when they first met them. 

_He was feeling very strange..._

He can't help but asked, "what's your name?"

The boy stopped slurping noodles to look up at him, "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo!"

He didn't know if he gave his name back to the boy because he felt his stomach dropped at the child's name. He didn't have the signature fiery red hair of the Uzumaki clan but he has some of the clan's facial structure and the boy didn't look like he was lying.

Orochimaru didn't like the conclusion forming at his head. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am traversing turbulent waters here, people! (Snickers at my pun.) So, this is my first fic and what started out as an idea out of pure boredom (because of the quarantine lockdown) and dissatisfaction with the lack of Orochimaru fluff, I am finally doing this!
> 
> Let's just say that I'm a Naruto fan but I've only finished the manga because I don't have the time to finish the anime what with all that fillers, so I'm using the manga as a basis. I'm also reading some facts about the Second Shinobi War at the trusted internet, so, some will be changed because I said so and I wanted to do so.
> 
> And, and, and! I am shit with timelines! This'll really be messy but I'm doing my best to atleast polish it. In this fic, Kakashi and Naruto will be at the same age because why not? Why not let those cute little babies bond?
> 
> English is not really my first language, nor am I a master of it, so some grammatical and typographical errors will be seen.
> 
> I DO NOT OWN NARUTO (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
> 
> — Segnor


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Naruto rick rolled himself to the past.

Naruto stared at the Rokudaime Hokage, clear confusion written at his face.

"So, you're giving me this... _For free_?" He asked while squinting his eyes. 

"Maa... Naruto, what's with that stare?" Kakashi asked and leaned back in his chair, "if I didn't know any better, I'll say my cute student don't trust me anymore."

"But why are you giving me this?"

"It's a gift." 

"A gift? What for, 'ttebayo?" 

Kakashi blinked his eyes when he noticed that Naruto didn't really know why he was giving him a gift.

"Because it's your birthday," Kakashi slowly said.

He was met with Naruto's wide eyes and surprised expression that turned into understanding.

" _Oh_." He said as if it was the most surprising fact he had learned for his seventeen years of existence, " _so that's why_ Sakura-chan gave me coupons for Ichiraku's!"

_He forgot_.

He forgot it's his birthday. Of course he would.

"Thanks for this, sensei!" Naruto beamed and Kakashi eye-smiled back at him, "this _squiggles_ are pleasant to look at!"

Kakashi almost face planted at his desk. _Uzumaki Naruto_ , son of Namikaze Minato famed for his revival of the Hiraishin seal from the Nidaime Hokage's scrolls, son of Uzumaki Kushina who had one of the most brilliant minds at sealing after her clan, student of Jiraiya of the Sannin, the last of Konoha's Fuinjutsu Master, _just called the Fuinjustu scrolls Kakashi gave him as 'squiggles' and 'pleasnt to look at.'_

Kakashi fought back an urge to scream. After years of dealing with Naruto, he thought that nothing would surprise him anymore but of course, he was proven wrong at his assumption. Konoha's Most Unpredictable Shinobi would always be unpredictable and would always manage to surprise Kakashi.

The Rokudaime gathered his last will of saneness, "do you know what those are, Naruto?"

"Squiggles," he said like it was a fact. _Like the world was flat and not round, like the Bijuus were fluffy domestic pets and not a massive creature of chakra and rage._

"And what will you do with them?"

"I dunno," the blond teen shrugged his shoulders, "I guess I'll display them at my apartment. Sakura-chan always told me that my apartment's bare and I should invest on making it presentable somehow, dattebayo!"

This seventeen-year-old teenager was the Shinobi Nation's Savior, the Hero of the Fourth Shinobi War, the Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi no Youko... Kakashi sighed. 

"Those are Fuinjutsu scrolls," the Copy Nin said after a moment of mental image of what Naruto would do to his gift, "Minato-sensei and Kushina-nee-san's scrolls."

Kakashi watched at how bewildered Naruto became and looked back at the scrolls he was holding as if it was the most important artifact he had ever held.

"From Tou-chan and Kaa-chan?" He whispered to himself but Kakashi heard it.

He nodded, "I believe that you will like to have it."

Naruto looked up to him and stretched his lips in a smile that was so Naruto, " _thank you, sensei._ "

Kakashi waved at the heartfelt gratitude and he fetched his copy of Icha Icha to hide his own smile.

"Maa... It's nothing, now scurry along, my cute student."

* * *

Naruto tried to understand what he was reading but after ten complete minutes of staring incomprehensibly at the notes and not understanding a single thing of what it was saying, Naruto brought it down.

Fuinjutsu... They're... _They're squiggles!_

How was he supposed to understand how this line would go with this line and how this scribble would match with this scribble?!

He applauded his Tou-chan, Kaa-chan and Ero-sennin for understanding this lines.

**'Kit, you'll combust yourself from thinking.'** Kurama grumbled as he was woken up from Naruto's loud thinking.

Naruto groaned at himself for not understanding his parent's notes when he remembered something. 

_'Hey, Kurama!'_ Naruto yelled mentally.

He heard the fox sighed at his head so he continued. 

_'Do you know sealing?'_ Naruto asked.

**'I'm sealed for three generations of Jinchuriki, two of them were masters of sealing and one of them was a complete idiot,'** Kurama deadpanned ignoring Naruto's whining, **'of course I know sealing.'**

_'Really? Can you teach me?'_

**'No.'**

_'Why, dattebayo?! You're no fun!'_

**'Sealing needs brain, kit, not brashness.'** Kurama replied.

_'Hey!'_

Naruto crossed his arms and pouted. If Kurama won't teach him... Then he'll teach himself! Kakashi-sensei and Ero-sennin always told him that he understood better when he's experiencing it himself! 

It's not that he needed to do this, _but he needed to._ If what Kakashi-sensei told him was true, his parents were masters of sealing and they must've loved doing this. Even though Naruto knew that his parents were always watching out for him (with what happened when his Kaa-chan helped him with controlling the powers of the Kyuubi and meeting his Tou-chan for the second time at the Fourth Shinobi War), he'd always known that his parents' would always be with him even though they're both long gone. But with these scrolls... He'll have a connection with them. 

_Maybe_... Maybe he can continue their legacy. 

"Yes!" He nodded, determination shining in his eyes, "I can do this, 'ttebayo!" 

He looked for one of the sealing scrolls Kakashi-sensei gave him and looked at his parents' notes. From what he slightly understood, this scroll needed chakra to activate.

The blond Jinchuriki opened the scroll and placed his hand on top of the center of the scribbles where a circle was drawn. He channeled chakra in his hands when he heard Kurama yelled at him, accidentally channeling the Bijuu's chakra.

**'Kit, no! Naruto, stop! That'll kill you—'**

But it was already too late, the blond Jinchuriki was enveloped in a blinding flash of light and in that moment he was gone, leaving his apartment filled with unopened sealing scrolls.

* * *

When he was a child, Naruto always believed that Fate liked to mess with him. He was ostracized for a reason he didn't know and was treated as the village pariah, he always got into trouble with the civilian citizens and shinobi alike of the village. But when he got older, Sakura-chan told him that he must've been listed on Fate's list of the _'Unlucky Ones'_ because whenever there's trouble, he'd always be at the epicenter of it. 

Naruto learned how to adapt at how unlucky his life had become and after the war, he realized that he must've been Fate's favorite because despite the troubles he encountered, he would always stand up as the victor and he would come out of it with his life intact. Yes, he might failed to protect some of his precious people (Ero-sennin and Neji, Kami, bless them) but that would never bring Naruto down.

And now, Naruto considered himself as lucky, and Kurama agreed at how right he was. 

**'Kit, open your eyes. Kit!'**

Naruto's consciousness first returned to him when he heard the fox yelling at him, telling him to wake up.

_'Ugh, what happened?'_ He asked Kurama as Naruto groaned and held his head with both hands. It was painfully throbbing— it's as if he received one of Sakura-chan's punches directly at his head.

**'Your idiocy happened, that's what!'** Kurama said and if Naruto looked at their shared mind scape, he would receive the full death glare of an angry Bijuu. **'Do you know how dangerous that was? You shouldn't mess with incomplete sealing scrolls! Especially if it concerns time and space!'**

_'Time and space? What do you mean, dattebayo?'_

**'What happened was that you traveled through time and space because you placed not only your chakra at that seal but also mine! That seal won't activate if you didn't put my chakra in it! You almost killed yourself because your body was torn into different pieces in space but I managed to hold onto you and put you back. Kit, when I told you that Fuinjutsu needed brain, I was not kidding. Thank your luck that you manage to stay alive for seventeen years!'**

Naruto processed Kurama's angry rambling but he came up blank.

Okay... _'so... What does that mean?'_

He was met with Kurama's angry roar at his mind and Naruto's headache ten-folded.

**'You were displaced in time and space!'** The Kyuubi yelled. **'You time traveled!'**

Naruto scratched the back of his neck when he comprehended his situation, _'I time traveled?! But that's impossible, dattebayo! That can't happen!'_

**'You defied the law of probability ever since you were born, kit. Nothing is impossible when it comes to you.'**

Naruto groaned and buried his head to his knees. He stopped at what he was doing when he felt his hands. He raised his hand and started to pat himself. 

"AAAAHHH! I'm tiny!" The blond Jinchuriki yelled and stood up, "Kurama, I'm tiny! Why do I look like I'm five?!"

**'Of course, you are! I told you your body was torn in time and space. I manage to salvaged some of your essence and was not fast enough to build you back as good as new, that's why you're so small.'**

_'How can I turn back?'_ Naruto asked.

**'You can't.'**

_'What?! Kurama, why?!'_

**'Because you're an idiot. And oh, a small note, you can't also go back to your time.'**

Naruto was momentarily silenced due to shock. Wha... That couldn't be real! 

_'Why's that?!'_

**'You don't know a thing about sealing and I didn't exactly remember what that scroll was. We can't recreate the seal that placed you here because I will forbid you to mess up with Fuinjutsu scrolls again. Unless, you want to send your body into somewhere again and this time, I won't be enough to save you.'**

_'But that means... I... I can't go home?'_

**'Just be thankful that you're still alive, kit!'**

Naruto raised his hands in surrender. Grumpy, _grumpy_ fox.

But if he couldn''t go home...

Then what would happen to Konoha?

What of Kakashi-sensei, Sakura-chan, Sasuke-teme, Sai-baka and Yamato-taichou? Would they miss him?

Would they notice that he's gone?

Would Tsunade-baa-chan notice that her favorite gaki was missing? 

_Would._.. 

Would they be okay with him gone? 

Where would he stay? Would this place— this time— accept him for _who_ he is? 

**'Kit, you know I'll always be here for you, right?'**

Naruto was stopped from his dark thoughts by Kurama. He smiled to himself and nodded. That's right, brooding was Sasuke-teme's specialty! He didn't have the time to be dark and gloomy now! 

When he felt Kurama sent him a warm influx of chakra that calmed him immensely, Naruto plopped himself at the forest floor. He stared at the tall trees that shaded him and closed his eyes. His surrounding felt familiar and a grin broke down on his lips when he felt the chakra in the trees. 

He's near the boarder of the Land of Fire! That means... Konoha's nearby!

"I'll go back to Konoha and see _when_ I am!" Naruto excitedly cheered, his small body vibrating with compressed energy of a seventeen-year-old mind. 

They better get ready for Konoha's No. 1 Most Unpredictable Ninja, Uzumaki—

**'Kit, get going.'**

"Aw! You ruined my monologue, dattebayo!"

He was rewarded by Kurama's booming laughter.

Yeah, no matter _where_ or _when_ he is, Naruto could do this, 'ttebayo! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic was inspired at how I got rick rolled in 2020! I was aghast at how I was again made victim of that stupid link and I haven't learned my lesson yet at clicking random links! Who would do something like that?! (Me)
> 
> Btw, I haven't had an ounce of sleep. I was determined to atleast made drafts for this one because after I finished the first chapter, I immediately posted it and being a dunce at using this site, I don't know how to unpost it. Yep, because of that, I am cramming! 
> 
> Also, how do you do tags?!?! I have thousands I need to put but AO3 won't accept it and boy was I frustrated! (Update, I figured it out in the end!) 
> 
> Why aren't I tech savvy?! (・_・ヾ)
> 
> — Segnor


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Feed a dog with a bone and he will follow you. Feed the Kyuubi Jinchuriki a cup of ramen and he will save you.

Trees. 

Trees. 

Trees. 

Trees everywhere. 

_Oh, look!_ Another tree!

"This is boring!" Naruto complained and he had the weird urge to stomp his feet... And so he did. He stomped his feet. 

**'Quit stomping your feet like a five-year-old, kit.'** Kurama said while his left ear was twitching.

"I can't! It's like I'm ordered to stomp my feet and it feels nice, 'ttebayo!" Naruto replied, "and my body's five years old!"

**'Your mind's seventeen.'**

_'So?'_

Kurama didn't bother to answer him and Naruto was left grumbling at himself. He almost smack himself at the head when he remembered how shinobi normally traveled. 

Why haven't he thought of that instead of walking?!

With a grin, Naruto dashed in the nearest tree he saw and stepped on it to ran vertically and propel himself on a run, only for him to smack his face in the tree and for his butt to hit the cold forest floor.

"Aw, that hurts," he moaned and massaged his nose.

Naruto heard Kurama laughing at him in his mind but he ignored the Kyuubi and stood up from his position. He walked towards the tree and raised a foot to stick it in. He tried channeling chakra at his foot but after seconds of failing, he brought his foot down.

"Why can't I use chakra, dattebayo?!" He asked to himself, his nose scrunching up with confusion.

**'Idiot,'** Kurama said as if exasperated, **'can you use chakra when you were five years old?'**

_'No.'_ Naruto answered and gasp loudly, _'does that mean I can't use chakra until I turned twelve again?! That's... That's unfair! What about my cool jutsus?!'_

Kurama sighed and rubbed his snout with his paws, this idiot. **'I didn't say that. You can still use chakra but you have to practice. Your body needs to adjust with your current body and please refrain from using jutsu that needs large chakra or you will explode your insides.'**

Naruto groaned. Oh man, he couldn't use his Bunshins anymore? He couldn't use Sage Mode? Bijuu Cloak?

He repeatedly hit his head on the tree and when he heard a voice in his head that suspicious sounded like Sakura-chan threatening him to take care of his body, he stopped. Having a small body's too troubleso— he mentally stopped himself when he was sounding like Shikamaru.

Naruto took a deep breath and repeated his mantra.

To Konoha!

To Konoha!

To Konoha!

"I can do this!" He yelled to himself and took off running.

He wasn't sure how many hours have passed but even when he felt tired, he pushed himself. There's no use in giving up! He's so near to the village now and if his guess was correct, it'll just be a day of running. He can do this. Naruto had spent more hour of running than that.

"I'm hungry," he suddenly told himself and almost smacked his face in another tree when he paused at running.

He heard Kurama laughing at him again but he ignored the fluffy fox. 

The blond Jinchuriki patted his stomach when it grumbled like an angry Bijuu and laughed at himself when he remembered that he does have an angry Bijuu at his tummy!

**'It's not funny, kit,'** Kurama snapped but Naruto continued laughing.

"That's funny," he wheezed and tried to calm himself.

His stomach grumbled again and Naruto winced, he forgot about that. He stood up from his lying position at the forest floor where he lied down to laugh and started picking up sticks. 

He gathered enough sticks to built himself a fire and he placed it near a tree where he found a comfortable place to sit and went to hunt for some rabbit. If he remembered correctly, this place has lots of rabbit, so he'll hunt some, skin them and roast it in the fire. Sounds like a great plan! Good job, Naruto!

He patted himself and nodded like a wizened Sage at how quick he's thinking.

See? He could do this!

**'Snake!'**

Huh?

_'Do you want some snake?'_ Naruto asked the Kyuubi, confused because he had never seen Kurama ate before even when Naruto offered him some food and asked his preferences. Maybe he liked snakes? Should he roast a snake then? Would that taste deliciou—

**'No!'** Kurama replied, **'I felt a snake nearby.'**

Naruto sniffed and nodded. He caught a whiff of snake nearby. 

_'Do you want me to hunt and cook it?'_

**'Idiot, it's not a normal snake. Look for it, kit!'**

Naruto followed what Kurama told him. He slowly went towards the direction where he smelled the snake and hid behind the bushes. He took a peek to look at the cave where the snake was residing and his eyes widened.

_'Is that... Is that Orochimaru?!'_

**'Yes, kit.'**

Naruto watched with wide eyes as the Snake Sannin prepared fire for himself. He took stock at what he was wearing and if it was possible, his eyes tripled in size.

Instead of his normal cream coloured yukata, Orochimaru was wearing a Jounin flak jacket. It was Naruto's first time seeing the man (woman? What did Sakura-chan called him again? An... andro... _andro-something_ ) wore Konoha's uniform but what truly shocked him was the hitai-ate in his forehead. It was Konoha's hitai-ate with no slash that indicated he was a missing nin. He looked like a normal Konoha Jounin camping to rest and eat before continuing his journey back to the village because he just finished a mission. 

_'He's still at Konoha?'_ Naruto wondered and his roommate didn't bother to give him an answer.

Naruto stopped peeking from the bushes and took a sit comfortably when his legs felt uncomfortable. (Curse this baby body.) 

How far did he ended up in the past? If Orochimaru was still at the village... Did that mean he traveled back twenty years at the past?! Orochimaru deserted the village after the Yondaime Hokage was announced because of his disappointment that he wasn't chosen— _Yondaime Hokage_...

His Tou-chan and Kaa-chan were still alive! Even Ero-sennin! Obito's still a kid and even Kakashi-sensei! Naruto can see them alive (and happy) and maybe he can also save them—

**'Are you sure, Naruto?'** Kurama asked in a calm voice, **'are you sure you want to save them?'**

_'Yes,'_ he replied.

**'But if you do that, if you change the past, you will change the future.'**

_'I want to change the future—'_

**'You will erase your future, kit. Zetsu and Madara is still alive at this timeline. If you started changing things, Kaguya can be revived. The Moon Eye Plan can still happen. Your friends might not even be born. Yes, you will save your parents but at what cost? Naruto, think about this.'**

_'I know the future, 'ttebayo! I know what will happen and I— we can stop it from happening altogether!'_ Naruto argued in a rare bout of knowledge, _'Obito won't turn into Tobi and in doing that, he won't trigger your attack at the village! We can prevent Zetsu's plan, Kurama! Maybe, we can even stop Nagato from spreading the cycle of hate. We can stop Danzo from ordering Itachi to massacre his clan! Sasuke didn't deserve to live as an avenger. Kakashi-sensei didn't... Didn't deserve to live a life full of guilt because of the death of his precious people!'_

Kurama didn't answer Naruto and with slight irritation, he picked the dried leaves in his side and threw it. _'Don't leave me hanging, Kurama!'_

A surprised squeak escaped Naruto's lips as he duck for cover when a kunai flew near his head and embedded at the tree behind him. He stared with horror as to how close that came to his head and he remembered another incident where he threw a kunai and he accidentally killed a rabbit.

Even though he was supposed to hunt rabbits, Naruto was offended for the rabbit's part.

He pulled the kunai embedded at the tree (with quite difficulty because of his tiny— baby hands!)

"Hey! What was that for?!" Naruto angrily yelled as he came out of the bushes, waving Orochimaru's kunai, "didn't you know that throwing this thing is dangerous and you might harm someone, 'ttebayo!"

He ignored the fact that the Snake Sannin was on a fighting stance, as if expecting an enemy nin to suddenly show up, and he continued his rant.

"Ninjas are always so paranoid even when you don't need it! Randomly throwing weapons at everything you think was an enemy and what if it really was just a rabbit and not an enemy and you made a fool of yourself in front of your teammates and that teme will call you paranoid! He'll look at you as if you're stupid and he'll always be at the top because he believe that he's good than you! And if you're just trying to impress them with your skills because you're not the deadlast they expect you to be but you were so paranoid that you attacked a rabbit! An innocent rabbit who might have a family! Now, do you know understand my point, dattebayo?!"

Naruto panted after he finished his rant. He remembered his first C-rank mission that turned into an A-rank when they encountered the S-rank missing nin, Momochi Zabuza, and his protégé, Haku, at the Land of Wave. Naruto was so embarrassed when he was showing off and threw a kunai at the rabbit. But of course, that embarrassment was quickly erased after their dangerous encounters, and now that he was at the receiving end of a kunai, he _clearly_ remembered that incident.

Naruto paused in thinking and asked himself, _'why was I offended for the rabbit's part, in the first place?'_

He was waiting for his mind's wires to work at why that was when Orochimaru nodded at him and Naruto visibly brightened up. Hey, atleast he'd leave an important lesson onto Orochimaru about unnecessary paranoia and showing off.

(This guy loved to show off.)

Naruto approached Orochimaru and took the Sannin's hand. He ignored its twitching as he gave him his kunai back.

"Thank you," the Snake Sannin said.

"No problem, dattebayo— is that ramen?" Naruto took a sniff at his surroundings and his eyes landed at the abandoned cup of ramen near the fire.

Orochimaru looked back at the ramen and nodded back at him. 

"It's good, right?" He narrowed his eyes while waiting for the Sannin's reply.

"It is."

Naruto watched Orochimaru, trying to determine if he was lying and when he saw that he wasn't, he was struck with a sudden realization. Huh, Orochimaru does eat... And he likes ramen!

_'I guess, he wasn't that bad at this point,'_ Naruto mused to himself. Anyone who likes ramen was not bad at Naruto's eyes— a fact that made Kurama want to gouge his eyes out. 

"Ramen's the best, dattebayo!" He energetically pumped his fist heavenwards but stopped when he remembered that he still need to hunt for food because he really was now hungry, "oh, but I have to go!" Time to hunt for those rabbits... 

Naruto waved at the Snake Sannin and started walking towards the bush where he hid. He already gathered sticks and he just needed the rabbit to roast. Even though he protected the rabbit's dignity earlier, he still needed dinner. Poor, rabbit. 

"Do you want some?"

Naruto heard Orochimaru's voice even if he's whispering and he turned back to look at the Sannin.

"Really?!"

Orochimaru nodded. Naruto yelled his thanks and ran towards the cave's entrance. He waited for the Sannin to wave his hand in permission first before he followed and sat near the fire. The Snake Sannin retrieved miso ramen in his scrolls and put some hot water in it before he gave it to Naruto and handed him a hashi.

"Itadakimasu!" He thanked and waited for Orochimaru to do the same before he broke off his hashi and dug in.

"What's your name?"

Naruto stopped slurping his noodles to stare at the man, he hid his apprehension. Was he allowed to say his name? Did Orochimaru knew his Kaa-chan and see the resemblance? 

Despite his inner questions, Naruto smiled, "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo!"

If Orochimaru had a strange look in his face, Naruto didn't see it because he continued eating. He's really hungry and ramen always taste best if you're tired and hungry! And that, ladies and gentlemen, is a known fact! 

After he finished eating, he was surprised when Orochimaru offered him another cup and he thanked the man _profusely_. He quickly finished his food and was about to say goodbye to the Snake Sannin, when a yawn broke through his lips and he rubbed a hand at his tired eyes. He wasn't sure what happened next because he's feeling so tired suddenly and cursed his chibi body again. Of course after a full meal, he'd feel sleepy! He was running all day and he was quite stressed out, dattebayo!

And when he opened his eyes, Naruto watched as Orochimaru settled near the mouth of the cave and the blond Jinchuriki looked confused as to how he was now lying down in a pile of dried leaves and a warm blanket was thrown over his shoulders. 

He looked back at the Sannin. 

_'Kurama?'_ When the Kyuubi didn't answer, Naruto continued, _'maybe the Orochimaru of this time still has the chance to not be who he was at the future. I don't think... I don't think he's that cold hearted. Yes, he killed Hokage-jiji and kidnapped Sasuke-teme... But he's really not that Orochimaru yet. He's different from his future self, right? I think... I think we'll save him.'_

He waited for Kurama's reply and when he felt his body shutting down because of sleepiness, he heard the Kyuubi's voice.

**'Well, he did give you ramen and a blanket.'**

Naruto smiled to himself and shut his eyes close. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates will be short because I have the attention span of a goldfish and have a hard time focusing on doing one thing at a time, so writing's very hard for me. It's really a pain. 
> 
> And I have an original novel written in my first language and I have to update that (or not, depends if I'll recover to my writer's block at that one) and because of writing this, I am mixing my words up and let me tell you how irritating that was. It was very, very irritating. This one time I forgot the word for pillow and I was stuck all day thinking what it's English was and I was describing it to my siblings and they haven't got a clue as to what I'm saying until I got my pillow and showed it to them! 
> 
> (I'm ranting, sorry.)
> 
> (I'mma cut this rant!) 
> 
> Thank you for the support, I didn't really expect it because I know I'm shit at writing, I'm just doing this to sate my boredom. Nevertheless, thank you, it was really overwhelming ♡＾▽＾♡
> 
> — Segnor


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hello, silence, Naruto's old friend. Kurama is Naruto's guardian angel... Guardian fox? Kami, bless his poor furry soul.

Naruto was bouncing as he walked alongside the Snake Sannin, lips stretched in a wide smile and excitement twinkling in his eyes. 

"Really? You'll let me join you to Konoha?"

The Snake Sannin nodded, "since you have told me that you are planning to go to the village and we're already near."

"That's great, dattebayo!" He cheered and pumped his first in the air.

He heard the Sannin hummed at him and Naruto couldn't stop grinning. Future Orochimaru was a certified asshole, that Naruto was certain of. But this man, who's still loyal to the village is not that bad... Dare he say _kind_?

When dawn broke, Naruto was woken up by Orochimaru and the latter offered him cup ramen as breakfast and told Naruto that he have to go. When Naruto couldn't help but asked where he was going, Orochimaru replied that he just finished a mission and he's going back to Konoha. Naruto absent-mindedly told the Sannin that he was also planning to go to the village, when the Snake Sannin offered to let Naruto join him, the blond Jinchuriki didn't refuse. It would be easier for him if he have Orochimaru as a guide because even if he knew the way to Konoha like the back of his hand, there were differences to the forest that surrounded Konoha in this time than in his original timeline. The trees looked almost gigantic at his perspective and he sorely missed his seventeen-year-old body.

"Why are you alone in your journey?" Orochimaru asked after minutes of silence.

"Oh, I'm always alone," Naruto answered truthfully when he remembered his experiences at the village at this age. He had just left the orphanage where he grew up after his first meeting with Hokage-jiji and telling him how he wanted to be a shinobi— be a Hokage like him! The older man enrolled him at the Academy and gave him his apartment to rent.

At first he was receiving whatever he needed from the Hokage like food and clothes but after months has passed and he had adjusted, the Sandaime stopped providing him his needs and instead, gave him his monthly stipend to spend. Hokage-jiji said to him that if he wanted to be a shinobi, he needed to know how to stand up for himself. But of course, the Sandaime continuously visited him and never failed to treat him at Icharaku's after Naruto told him it was his favorite food. At that time, he never had a favorite food until old man Teuchi offered him free ramen when Naruto was shunned by restaurants and vendors who refused to let him buy anything even though he had the money to pay for it. He didn't tell the Hokage his situation because he knew that the old man was already spending his time with him in spite of the fact that he was always busy running the village.

"I never really met my parents," Naruto couldn't help but add (because some part of his brain told him to do so and he had the urge to follow it) and it was the truth. Yes, he did got to meet with his Tou-chan and Kaa-chan but he never got to meet them when they were still alive ang kicking. "My parents died when I was a baby."

He thought back at the fact that the child him was very lonely. He didn't have anyone at his side. The only one he got to talk to was Teuchi-san and Hokage-jiji. But somehow... It got better. He met Iruka-sensei that always worry for him even when he told him not to, Sakura-chan that always yelled at him to take better care of himself, Sasuke-teme that would always be a teme but now he's on a journey to redeem himself, Kakashi-sensei who would always be a lazy ass but was never late whenever they needed him, Ero-sennin that will always be perverted and who taught him how to give up hate and Tsunade-baa-chan that always called him gaki but managed to make it sound fond and heartfelt.

He missed them. It's been just a day that he haven't seen them but Naruto truly missed them. 

In his seventeen years of living at Konoha, he manage to build a family for himself. And now, he wouldn't... _He wouldn't see them again._

Without warning, he stopped walking when his dam broke down and he found himself rubbing at his eyes to stop the waterworks. He tried telling himself that he shouldn't cry because he's seventeen years old now and he's not actually five but he couldn't stop himself.

(Why was he crying?) 

"I'm sorry," he told Orochimaru because the Sannin let him travel with him and now he's slowing them down.

His companion didn't give him an answer but just let him cry and Naruto was thankful for that. He didn't need reassurances he didn't need pity, the silence was enough for him. 

Silence did comforted him sometimes. 

* * *

After crying and emptying his tearducts, Naruto apologized to the Snake Sannin and told him that it would be alright if he'd go first and leave him but Orochimaru just tilted his head at the village's direction and waited for Naruto to started walking. Naruto noticed that the Sannin was actually taking small steps instead of his normal elegant stride and the blond Jinchuriki smiled. He was considerate enough to match Naruto's slow walking because of his short legs.

"Hey," Naruto called out to the Sannin, "you never told me your name, 'ttebayo!"

The Snake Sannin raised an eyebrow at him as if surprised that he haven't introduced himself before, "Orochimaru."

Naruto's smile widened at he hummed to himself.

_'Hey, Kurama! I think I like him already!'_ Naruto told the fox.

Kurama opened a single eye, **'that fast? Naruto, you shouldn't trust everyone you met.'**

_'Hey! I haven't heard you whine about me traveling with him, dattebayo! So that means you also like him!'_

**'I don't like humans, especially shinobi,'** Kurama snapped back but venom was lacking at his voice.

_'Oh, I know you like him,'_ Naruto teased, _'he's not actually happy trigger murder in this age. I'm surprised he hadn't tried to kill me yet but I guess, this is what he really was?'_

**'Someone who treats you decently deserves consideration, kit.'** The grumpy fox murmured and went back to his nap. **'And he _feels_ different than the Orochimaru you know.' **

Naruto went back to humming when Orochimaru suddenly spoke. 

"If you don't mind me asking," the Sannin said in his soft voice (was his voice always that soft?) "where did you live?"

**'Tell him that an old man took care of you and you used to live near Amegakure,'** Kurama supplied. **'Also, he died because a missing nin killed him and you escaped. You have nowhere to go but you remembered that the old man wanted to live in Konoha so you taught it would be best to try that out.'**

_'Ame? Why in Ame? And who's the old man?'_

**'It's better to answer with bended truths. The old man's the Sandaime Hokage, kit, you first met him at this age right? And if we're twenty years at the past, Ame has just been destroyed by Konoha after the war and that village had tons of missing nin. Just tell it, kit!'**

"I used to live near Ame," Naruto answered as if it was a fact, let it be known that Naruto's a great liar, "but when a missing nin attacked our home, he... He killed Jiji but I escaped, 'ttebayo! I remembered Jiji telling me that he once wanted to live in Konoha, so that's why I..."

Naruto looked off at the distance, not wanting Orochimaru to see his face and know that he's lying. Even if it would save his life, Naruto couldn't tell a believable lie. He's worse than Kakashi-sensei at lying that one time, Sakura-chan had to pull him and talk to him. Sakura-chan taught him kunoichi skills that were specially taught to them at the Academy and one of them was lying. She really tried her best to make Naruto a believable liar because she said that lying might save Naruto's life one day, if the situation needed it, but the blond Jinchuriki was so bad at it that Sakura-chan had to give up. 

_'Was that okay?'_ Naruto asked Kurama. 

**'I think he'll believe you, you're in a child's body after all. Children are more believable,'** Kurama agreed, **'asked him if you'll be welcomed at the village. Show a bit of hesitation.'**

_'But why, dattebayo?'_

**'Kit... Just do it...'**

"Do you think... The Hokage will let me stay, 'ttebayo?" Naruto asked to Orochimaru, heeding Kurama, when the Sannin remained silent after his words.

"Uzushiogakure and Konoha were sister villages," Orochimaru answered instead of saying yes or no.

Huh?

" _Uzu_... What now?" Naruto asked confused.

Orochimaru turned to look at him with a serious expression. 

"The Shodaime Hokage's wife was from Uzushiogakure, Uzumaki Mito. Her family was the main branch of Uzumaki and after the founding of Konoha, a partnership between Konoha and Uzushio was formed because the Uzumaki led the Village of Whirlpool. As you can see in every flak jacket of Konoha nin, an insignia of Uzushio was imprinted at the back to symbolize the two villages' unity," Orochimaru said and Naruto wondered if he was interested at teaching because for the first time, he understood history! He looked back at Orochimaru's flak jacket and _woah_! Why haven't he noticed that whirlpool shape before? It's the same in his jacket!

And the Hokage's wife was an Uzumaki? A village of Uzumaki? Why haven't he heard of that before? Why wasn't it taught at the Academy... Or maybe he wasn't just listening when Iruka-sensei was teaching them about that? And... And he have a clan?! A whole clan full of Uzumaki?! That's so awesome!

... Where are they?

"But sadly, Uzushio was destroyed ten years ago and no one knows how many survived after its destruction."

Naruto processed his words. His hope of finding his clan was immediately diminished after finding out that their village was destroyed.

"Why was Uzu destroyed? Who destroyed the village?" Naruto asked. 

"The Uzumaki were well-known for their talents and mastery for Fuinjutsu and because of that, some village feared them and bonded together to destroy Uzushio. It was done overnight and before Konoha received the news for help, the Land of Whirlpool was already destroyed. As to who destroyed them, that's an S-rank information that I can't tell you."

Listening to Orochimaru explained how a village of sealing masters were destroyed because of fear, Naruto thought that it was like the Uchiha massacre all over again.

A whole clan was decimated because of fear... If he was sent earlier, could he... 

**'You know that you can't save everyone, kit,'** Kurama said, voice serious.

_'I know, Kurama. It's just sad that I know I can do something to save them but I can't because they're already gone. I know I can't save eveyone but... I can try, right?'_

**'If you know, then stop hurting yourself! It's not your fault! You melodramatic hero!'**

Before Naruto got to argue with Kurama that he's not melodramatic (what does that even mean? Was it the same as dramatic? What's a _melo_?), his eyes focused on the sight in front of him. _Walls_... Village walls.

_Konoha_.

He's home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little trivia, this was supposed to be entitled as 'Rick Rolling to the Past' but I told myself that no, you won't do that, move on from being rick rolled and find a better title. I really have the talent in making dramatic titles (because I'm an extra like that), even though I'm focusing at something, a title will popped into my mind and now I have the 'obligation' to make a story and use it.
> 
> Who's craving kimchi?
> 
> *raises my right hand
> 
> Me!! 
> 
> Who's craving kimchi aside from me?
> 
> *raised my left hand
> 
> ME!!! (●♡∀♡)
> 
> — Segnor


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hokage-jiji was once young... That's a surprising fact for Naruto.

At his long years of being the Hokage, Sarutobi Hiruzen believed that there was just things that were certain to happen.

The Nidaime Hokage, his Tobirama-sensei, was killed at the hands of Kumo shinobi because it didn't matter that Hiruzen argued that he shouldn't sacrifice himself, the Nidaime would and will always sacrifice himself if his action would bring tranquility to the youth of Konoha that would continue living the Will of Fire.

He grew apart with his former teammate Danzo because he was the one to receive the title of the Hokage passed down to him by their late sensei himself. Ever since they were but a child, Danzo wanted the hat for himself and even when Hiruzen was the one wearing it, he didn't stopp coveting the Hokage's hat.

Tsunade was broken at how over time, those who surrounded her would always leave her side. After the death of Senju Tobirama, her great uncle, Tsunade started to be stuck in a place where she couldn't stand back up. Somehow, she was managed to be healed by the presence of her brother Nawaki and her lover, Nato Dan. But after the death of her remaining lifeline, Hiruzen was just waiting for the exploding seal to explode and Tsunade would be gone to the village. No matter how much her dedication to healing was, how could she heal someone when she couldn't even heal herself?

Jiraiya was the first one to leave. Yes, he came back but he was never the same again. Jiraiya has always been soft-hearted and it came to no one's surprise when he decided to leave the village and teach the three war orphans they encountered at Ame. After he came back, Jiraiya was always spouting about the cycle of hatred. In his three years of absence, he became a pacifist. He stated his rejection at _violence and war_ — two of the most constant thing at a life of a shinobi. He started a new dedication at teaching his genius of a student, at learning and improving Fuinjutsu and he was a blossoming spy master that had made connections outside the village.

And Orochimaru, ever since he first saw Orochimaru, Hiruzen was certain that he would go down at a dark path. Orochimaru has always been a genius at heart but his morals always switched from black to grey— never the white. At one point, Orochimaru was good. He was good. Hiruzen saw a broken soul at his young student and he tried to do his best to make him avoid the path of darkness. But after Jiraiya left, after Tsunade started wallowing herself with grief, Orochimaru completely shunned himself from everyone. He rarely met with Hiruzen and when he asked what his student was doing, Orochimaru would always reply that he was busy with his studies. Studies that he wasn't sure if it was ethical anymore. Hiruzen was hesitant to confront his student with this issue because he was afraid that if he showed Orochimaru how he was becoming suspicious, his student would be broken and and traverse that dark path of becoming something who he wasn't. Something who he shouldn't be. 

Those were the things that Hiruzen was certain what no matter what he did, would always happen.

_Looking back at the certainties, Hiruzen was curious at to how Orochimaru had started to take a step on a path that he wasn't sure what the outcome would be. Maybe, it was because of the blond Uzumaki._

"Hokage-sama."

"Bear," Hiruzen addressed the ANBU that suddenly appeared in his office.

"Orochimaru-sama was seen at the village gate," Bear reported in a monotonous voice.

Hiruzend nodded and lit his pipe, "I shall wait for him here. Dismiss."

It hasn't been five minutes since the ANBU was dismissed that Hiruzen heard a knock at his office door. The door swung and Hiruzen gave a small smile to his student.

Orochimaru slightly dipped his head when he step a foot inside his office as a sign of respect. Out of all his students, he's the only one who knocks in the door whenever meeting him— Jiraiya uses the window instead of the door and Tsunade just barges in, most of the times destroying the hinges or the door itself.

His brows rose in surprise when a small blond kid trotted next to Orochimaru like an adorable chick and he was looking at him with wide eyes. Hiruzen noted the whisker marks in both of his cheeks and the state of his clothing.

Why would Ororchimaru bring a child to him? Where did he get the child?

Who... 

"Wow, Jiji! You look young!"

* * *

"Orochimaru-sama, welcome back," one of shinobi guarding the gates, who looked like an Aburame, greeted at Orochimaru.

"I hope your mission treated you well, Orochimaru-sama." The shinobi who looked like a Hyuuga said as he handed a form towards Orochimaru.

"It did," the Snake Sannin replied as he started filling up the informations required for the gate pass.

Naruto looked up to the three shinobi, watching their interaction with wide eyes as the Hyuuga and Aburame talked to Orochimaru. Huh... He never saw the Sannin talked to other shinobi like this before. He wasn't weird towards them. _Huh_...

"And who is this little guy?"

All of their attention was turned to Naruto as the Aburame noticed him. 

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto, 'ttebayo!" He introduced himself and automatically pumped his fist. (Why was he doing this?)

The Aburame and Hyuuga stared at him with slightly wide eyes but before they got to ask, Orochimaru handed his form and started walking away. Naruto waved to the two shinobi before following the Snake Sannin.

Naruto was looking at everything. His head kept turning back and forth as he stared at the buildings that weren't there in the Konoha of his time. Some of the establishments that he used to see weren't there and the living settlements looked old in style. 

(He was hoping that that there's Ichiraku Ramen at this time because Konoha is not Konoha without the best ramen!)

The Kyuubi attack really did change Konoha because almost everything he saw was unfamiliar to him. Maybe their anger at him really was justified? Sure, Kurama wasn't really at fault for that attack and Naruto wasn't really a _demon_ but just a container for the embodiment of chakra— but _fear_ could do anything. 

Fear could destroy whole clans and village.

Fear could ostracize an innocent child. 

But Naruto knew better. Ero-sennin taught him that you should only be afraid of fear itself and you should never let hate control you. Because if it did... You could do unimaginable things you wouldn't wish you did. 

The only thing he noticed that was very familiar to him was how everyone was giving him a wide berth— as if avoiding him. His shoulder slumped when he remembered how he was treated at Konoha before everything that Naruto did for the village, when his attention caught something. They weren't staring at _him_ but at _Orochimaru_.

They were looking at the Snake Sannin like how they used to look at Naruto. 

_(How Naruto hated those cold and indifferent eyes.)_

But before he really thought about why they were looking at Orochimaru like that, they already arrived at the Hokage Tower. Some shinobi were greeting Orochimaru and he nodded back to them and some were giving Naruto questioning looks as if wondering what's a five-year-old boy doing with Orochimaru, no one had the chance to ask because the Sannin was walking towards the Hokage's office.

"Hokage-sama is already waiting for you, Orochimaru-sama," an ANBU suddenly appeared wearing a mask of bear.

Orochimaru tilted his head before the ANBU shunshined away. The Sannin knocked at the door and Naruto remembered how Ero-sennin refused to use doors and Tsunade-baa-chan would just barge in, not caring if she destroyed something. _Huh_...

When the Sannin entered, Naruto followed immediately, excited to see his Hokage-jiji and he abruptly stopped when he saw him.

"Wow, Jiji! You look young!" He burst out and looked at the Sandaime with wide eyes.

He lacked some of the wrinkles in his face that he was used to seeing and he's not that small yet! Naruto remembered that when Jiji was sitting behind his desk, almost from the shoulders down, it was hidden because he's so small! And his hair! It wasn't white but brown! Even his beard was brown! 

Naruto's mental image of the Sandaime being born with wrinkles and a pipe in hand was squished in his mind when he stared again at the Hokage's face. So, he wasn't born like that?! All this time Naruto was wrong?! 

This was ridiculous, 'ttebayo! Time travel was ridiculous! 

_'This is weird,_ ' Naruto thought, _'this Konoha is weird, Kurama. Weird, dattebayo!'_

Kurama only sighed at the idiocy of his Jinchuriki. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My sister and I were eating eggplant*  
> Me: do you know that Kakashi's favorite food are eggplants?  
> Her: really?  
> Me: yup, and Sasuke likes tomatoes  
> Her: what's Itachi's then?  
> Me, blanking out but remembering a scene when he cooked using his Sharingan: ... Eggs?  
> Her: no, that sweet round stuff  
> Me: fuck! Of course it's dango!  
> (I was really disappointed at myself because how could I forget about that?! I'm a disappointment.)
> 
> (༎ຶ⌑༎ຶ)
> 
> AAAAHHH!!! I have cramps in my hands!!! It hurts! 
> 
> This fic is turning out more serious than I thought. I wanted it just to be fluffy and full of crack but deeeeym. What should I do? \\(☉｡☉)/
> 
> — Segnor


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The blond child was interesting in a way that Orochimaru wasn't curious how he will dissect him.

Orochimaru is a scientist. 

Let it be known that once Orochimaru felt curious, he's prepared to do everything to feed it.

If there's a jutsu that caught his interest, he'll research about it and do everything for him to aquire it. If there's a study that he felt lacking, he'll spent his time gathering information and improving the subjects that requires information.

But if he's interested in a person, he always felt this tug in his gut that tells him to ~~dissect~~ them. He only felt this tug for two people. First was the current Kage of Amegakure, Sanshuou no Hanzo. And the second, quite frankly, was one of Konoha's counsellor and the warmonger himself, ~~Shimura Danzo~~.

When Jiraiya, Tsunade and Orochimaru faced Hanzo the Salamander at the battle field, Orochimaru wanted to dissect the Kage so badly. He was interested. He wanted to know how his body functioned with all of that poisoned travelling through his veins and vessel. He needed to know how his body resisted the poison of the salamander that was inserted inside him and how it built up an antidote that made him resistant to all kinds of poison. Even Chiyo of the Sand, one of the counsellors of Sunagakure, never found out how Hanzo's body works. And when Hanzo left them alive and gave them the name of Densetsu no Sannin, Orochimaru thought that his mind must have been affected by the poison. Because who in their right mind would leave an enemy alive and give them a name for honoring them?

He was interesting in a scientific way.

And when Orochimaru first met Shimura Danzo, he kept quiet, observing the man and wondering why he wanted to open him up.

( _"I want to dissect him,"_ eight-year-old Orochimaru said after Sarutobi-sensei left with Danzo. _"What? No, Orochimaru, he's not a frog. We don't dissect people!"_ Tsunade yelled while Jiraiya kept on laughing at the background because he thought Orochimaru was kidding at the time. He wasn't.)

Shimura Danzo was interesting. Orochimaru wanted to open him up and figure out how his brain works. Sarutobi-sensei was his friend but why was he coveting the hat while the Hokage's still alive? Wasn't he contented that the hat was given at his friend and not to him? Orochimaru has hundreds of questions playing in his mind when he observed how Danzo interacted with his former teammate, Sarutobi-sensei.

Tsunade always told him that people should never envy each other. Jiraiya always told him that friends should always support each other. But why was Danzo contradicting what the two said to him? Tsunade and Jiraiya were always right when it came to this things... They're always right when it's about morality...

Danzo was a dangerous man, that Orochimaru was sure of. He's contradicted what Orochimaru was taught of but even then, Sarutobi-sensei didn't notice what was happening when it came to this man. What was it that he had that even when Danzo requested war in front of Sarutobi-sensei, the Hokage won't blink an eye? Why can't the Hokage see that his friend wasn't really his friend? 

This man was an unknown specimen that reeked of danger and death, and nobody seemed to notice it aside from him.

If Tsunade or Jiraiya can hear his thoughts, Orochimaru wasn't certain what they'll say after they learned that when he's interested in a person, he wanted to dissect them.

But looking back to his present, Orochimaru felt interested at the Uzumaki boy. The curious thing was, he didn't want to dissect him. He didn't want to open the boy up. No, no... Orochimaru haven't felt that certain tug at his gut but what he felt was a different tug. 

It was warm. 

_He felt warm._

Whenever the blond Uzumaki directed a smile at him, Orochimaru felt this warm feeling in him. It started with his chest that spread throughout his body. 

When the Uzumaki boy cried, Orochimaru regretted that Tsunade never taught him what he should do to make the tears stop.

It was curious. _He was curious_. But he didn't want to study him, he didn't want to research about the boy, he didn't want to dissect his small body and _he didn't know_ what he wanted to do with this blond Uzumaki.

It was the first time that Orochimaru didn't know what to do but he didn't want to use his normal methods for knowing. 

He didn't know why he wanted to feed him, why he wanted to educate him and ~~why he wanted to keep him~~. 

It was slightly irritating, to be quite honest.

(Tsunade and Jiraiya hasn't explained to him what and why this was happening to him.) 

"The boy's an interesting child," Sarutobi-sensei commented when Uzumaki Naruto was sent with an ANBU to the cafeteria because his sensei wanted to talk to him.

Orochimaru remained silent and remembered how bewildered Sarutobi-sensei was when the Uzumaki exclaimed how young he looked, how brown his hair was, how excited he was at meeting him and how weird this village was. The Sannin was wondering what the boy meant at the last part but he remembered that he used to live near Ame— of course Konoha's peace will be _weird_ to him.

"What will you do with him?" Orochimaru asked.

The Sandaime remained silent for a minute, as if thinking before he spoke. 

"What happened to Uzushiogakure, it haunted me," Sarutobi-sensei said in a bout of honesty and Orochimaru raised a questioning brow to the man but kept on listening, "we were too late to help them, too late to stop how their fate ended. That's why I swore to myself that if an Uzumaki, a lucky survivor, sought an asylum to the village, I will accept them with open arms because they're my responsibility as the Hokage."

A blanket of silence envelope them after the Hokage's words and Orochimaru waited what his decision towards the Uzumaki boy will be.

"I'll let him stay with me for the time being. Kushina's out of the village for a misison with her team and I don't know when they will be back. I believe that she'll want to see a survivor of their clan and if she wanted to keep the boy, I'll let her," the Sandaime decided.

Orochimaru nodded but didn't voiced out his agreement. 

The decision about the Uzumaki boy was final and Orochimaru let it ended there. When his sensei asked how his mission turned out, he reported what had happened and gave him the scroll that he wanted to retrieve.

Over the time of his report, his mouth was functioning on an autopilot, so used to giving mission reports but his mind was wandering through different places. It kept on repeating the scene when Orochimaru let the boy sleep in his cave and let him travel with him. He felt disappointed at his Hokage's decision and he didn't know why that was. All he knew was that Uzumaki Naruto affected him in a way that has never happened before.

"I see," the Sandaime said after a moment and accepted the scroll Orochimaru gave him, "thank you for your service, Orochimaru."

Orochimaru dipped his head and started walking out of the Hokage's office. But when he was about to open the door, he hesitated. _He never hesitated before_. 

Sarutobi-sensei noticed his hesitation because he asked, "Orochimaru, is there something wrong?"

The Snake Sannin turned back to look at his sensei and blurted out, "can I please keep him?"

The Hokage was surprised at his question because both of his brows rose and his eyes slightly widened. 

"Until Uzumaki Kushina comes back?" He decided to add and clarify what he meant.

The Hokage stared at him for a minute and he let it happen. He was looking at something Orochimaru wasn't sure what it was but he must have found it because he nodded. 

"Alright," the Hokage agreed.

Orochimaru sent him a small smile before he left. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what the hell happened. I got carried away at this and then boom! This chapter was made and I really love how I made Orochimaru in this one! 
> 
> This chapter's just dedicated for the Sannin's thoughts and reasons why he wanted to keep Naruto. Yay! 
> 
> By the way, thank you for all the support! I really appreciate all the kudos and the comments, it always made my day. If I could come over and personally bow to all of you, I would do it just to show how grateful I am. Really, thank you all! ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ 
> 
> — Segnor


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jinchuriki + Snake Sannin= sleepover, dattebayo!

**'Kit.'**

_'Hmm?'_

**'Have you remembered the lesson I taught you about not trusting someone you just met or you know, strangers?'**

_'Yeah, dattebayo! You just said that to me earlier!'_

**'Then why—'**

_'Hmm?'_ Naruto wondered why Kurama trailed off until he heard a roar in his mind.

**'—are you going to stay with Orochimaru?!'**

Naruto winced at the intensity of Kurama's voice and thought that the Kyuubi really knew how to amplify his voice. It almost rattled his ears off even though Naruto heard him in his mind.

_'He's not a stranger! He told me his name earlier!'_ Naruto reasoned out and mentally patted himself how brilliant it was, _'besides, I knew him in the future or have you already forgotten about that?'_

**'You... Insolent kit! You're making my brain hurt at how idiotic you are!'**

_'Hey! You're making my brain hurt with all those shouting! Why are you so grumpy, 'ttebayo?!'_ Naruto asked and flail his hand. Orochimaru curiously looked at him but he didn't notice it, being too busy with the Kyuubi.

**'I told you that he felt different but Orochimaru is still the Snake Sannin! You should be careful when dealing with him!'** Kurama snapped back, **'yes, you wanted to save him from becoming an insane man but he's still dangerous, Naruto. Why aren't you even wondering why he wanted you to stay with him and not with the Hokage or someone who can look for you for the time being until Kushina comes back!'**

Naruto determinedly looked up to Orochimaru and now noticed his curious gaze but he ignored it in favor of asking, "why do you want me to stay with you?"

The Sannin blinked, not expecting his question, but he immediately gathered himself, "because I want to."

_'Because he wanted to!'_ Naruto relayed to Kurama, quite proudly in fact. 

**'I can hear him! You—'** Kurama stopped and he sighed, **'Kami, give me strength. I can't deal with this blockhead anymore.'**

Naruto tilted his head and wondered, _'but you are strong, Kurama.'_

**'Shut up! I don't want to talk to you anymore!'** The Bijuu snapped and promptly closed his eyes to sleep. 

_'Aw, but—'_

He stopped whining and thought back to how Orochimaru told him what the Hokage has decided. His jaw almost dropped (it did) when the Sannin told him that if he wanted to, he could stay with Orochimaru at his house until his Kaa-chan comes back from her mission. Naruto has gladly accepted the offer even though he was surprised that the Sannin even wanted to let him stay with him. Now that he thought of it, he had no plans whatsoever on what he'd do now that he's at Konoha. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to stay with his parents because he didn't know if they're even _together_ together or if they were also a child at this time. Was he supposed to tell them that he's from the future? Could he even tell them that? ( _Will they accept him?_ ) 

Time travel was so confusing! Naruto's head was now hurting because of all the thinking he had done. 

"Is there something wrong?" Orochimaru finally asked after watching the child flail for the second time.

"Uhm, why?" The blond Jinchuriki asked back.

"You kept on flailing your arms," the Sannin answered.

Naruto looked at his arms and immediately stopped himself when he noticed that Orochimaru was right and he quickly spoke, "I'm just thinking."

Orochimaru accepted his answer and he stopped in front of a wooden gate to open it. Naruto followed Orochimaru inside and he was surprised at the Sannin's place.

"It's a compound, 'ttebayo!" He exclaimed, looking at the spacious place and the huge red trees planted at the front yard. He pointed at the tree and asked, "what are those called?"

"Acer palmatum or commonly known as Red Emperor Maple," the Sannin answer— again, his voice sounded like Iruka-sensei when he was teaching an important stuff back at the Academy and Naruto found that he liked it when the Sannin readily answered his questions— "it gives nice shade and I liked the color of it when it was the season of autumn."

The blond Jinchuriki stared at the tree for one more time before giving his attention to Orochimaru, "I also like it," he declared in agreement. 

The Sannin quirked an eyebrow and started to enter his house. Orochimaru's house was a _Minka_ or a traditional house that Naruto only saw at the Hyuuga's compound and at that one _abandoned_ compound near the Academy that had been vandalized with words like _'traitor'_ , _'failure'_ and _'die'_ (he always wondered who used to live there because those words were harsh enough to make Naruto sad in empathy for that person). The floors were made of tatami and the sliding door was made of wood and thick paper.

Naruto got excited when he entered the entrance hall and he mimicked Orochimaru when the Sannin removed his shoes and put it at the wooden cabinet where shoes were placed. The Sannin toured him at the house and Naruto's only comment was that it was huge! He didn't know if Hinata's house was bigger or Orochimaru's! The blond Jinchuriki appreciated the engawa that leads out of the backyard where there was a koi pond and another maple tree!

After their tour was over, Orochimaru turned back to him, "you already ate at the Hokage Tower, right?"

The blond Jinchuriki nodded. 

"I'm sure you were tired after our travel, so, you'll have to take a bath first before going to sleep."

Naruto agreed because he was already feeling tired and his eyes were heavy. (Curse, _curse_ this baby body!) 

Orochimaru lead him in a bathroom that almost looked like an onsen and when he told his observations to the Sannin, he just quirked an eyebrow before he ushered him to take a bath. Naruto took it quickly and Orochimaru offered him some small yukata that he immediately wore, not caring if it didn't look good at him because he really just wanted to sleep.

Half dead at his feet, he followed the Sannin when he lead him to a new room and when he saw the bed next to the window, he dove for it and promptly went to sleep after saying his goodnight.

He didn't hear if the Sannin replied or not because he was already at his dreamland.

* * *

It was hours after his dead sleeping when Naruto suddenly bolted awake. He was hearing Zetsu at his head, cursing his existence and telling him how he shouldn't have lived, that they should've killed him when he was born because he ruined their plans.

There were times when Naruto was subjected to nightmares. Yes, the war was over but sometimes his mind remembers how helpless he felt when he thought that they wouldn't win and the world would be subjected to the Moon Eye Plan. Sakura-chan told him that it wasn't PTSD and it was just normal for him to sometimes experience that and he was thankful that he didn't have PTSD because he saw how men almost as strong as him suffer from that and never recovered.

At times like this, Naruto would visit Kakashi-sensei and just talk to him. The man was always ready to hear him out and trade stories with him. It became one of their bonding times that even if he wasn't having nightmares, Naruto would seek him out at the middle of the night because he knew that his sensei needed someone to talk to.

( _"They still haunt me,"_ Kakashi-sensei said one night when they were at the top of the Hokage Mountain, sitting at the Yondaime's head. _"It's hard to accept that what happened wasn't my fault when I was there and did nothing to prevent it.")_

But now that Kakashi-sensei wasn't here. Naruto wasn't sure who he'd go to. He really wanted to go back to sleep because of exhaustion but he didn't want to be alone right now.

* * *

Orochimaru just finished his bath after he finalized all his papers that he was researching and was now planning to go to sleep. He entered his room and lied down at the bed to get some much needed rest. 

When he had just closed his eyes, he heard the door to his room slid open and he readied himself for an attack. What he felt next was a light poking at his cheeks and small feet shuffling next to his bed.

After silence rang through his room, light snoring was heard and Orochimaru finally opened his eyes to look at his blond attacker. The little Uzumaki child was sleeping at the floor next to his bed. The boy must have had nightmares to be suddenly awoken at this late hour. 

The Sannin observed the rising and falling of his chest and how the light of the moon hit the blond's face.

_He really was just a child._

Orochimaru tutted, realizing that the Uzumaki boy would probably get cold if he kept on sleeping on the floor. 

"How curious," he murmured and brushed the boy's hair up. 

If Orochimaru carried the boy and laid him at his own bed and covered him with warm blankets, no one would know except from him.

And from Kurama who's _observing_ the whole ordeal. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates will not be as fast as it used to be (I think? It still depends on my mood though), I now found my motivation to finish all the series on my list, currently I'm watching The Big Bang Theory and for that, I am becoming more sarcastic everyday (my sister loved it, she thought that I'm funny when I'm out sassing everyone at the family.)
> 
> Take care, everyone! Stay safe! And keep healthy!
> 
> — Segnor


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snippets from Naruto's stay with Orochimaru.

Naruto was quite comfy at his bed, thank you very much. 

He snuggled deeper at the warm blanket that enveloped his body and when he was considering to go back to sleep, he took a sniff in the air and his unconsciousness was quickly drained away. The blond Jinchuriki smelled something delicious and his stomach growled in agreement.

He sat at the soft bed and roamed his eyes at the room that he was staying at. If his hazy memories served him right, this wasn't the room Orochimaru gave him.

There was a wide open window to his left side, earthy green curtains pulled back to let the sunlight enter the room. Across from where he was sitting on the bed were wooden sliding door that lead outside the engawa. There were several hung scrolls on the wall that Naruto couldn't comprehend what they meant. And when he looked at the door, there was a carving of trees and snakes in it that suspiciously looked like the maple tree outside the backyard.

Was he in Orochimaru's room? How did he got here?

His questions were answered when the wooden door slid open and there came the Snake Sannin. 

"You came here at my room and decided that the floor was a nice bed to sleep on," Orochimaru said when he noticed the questions in his eyes, "I was just about to wake you up."

"Good morning, 'ttebayo!" Naruto greeted, feeling his cheeks heating up at the thought that he sought the Sannin because he was having nightmares.

The Sannin tilted his head at him, black hair falling to his shoulders, "I hope you like steamed fish."

"It's okay, I guess?" Naruto wondered out loud.

"Would you care for some breakfast?"

And the Sannin didn't need to say a thing no more! Naruto was up in an instant and he was following him through his huge house. They got to the dining hall and he sat in front of the Sannin. Naruto looked at the prepared food with wonder. It was his first time having normal breakfast. Normally, he'd boil some water for his ramen or he'd heat up the leftover food he had on his refrigerator and hastily eat it because he's late for a training or a meeting with his team.

But when Naruto eyed the cooked rice, miso soup, stir fry vegetables and steamed fish, he can't help but wonder how nice this was.

(It really is nice.)

Naruto took a bite at his fish and his eyes widened with glee. 

"It's good!" He exclaimed, "not as good as ramen but it tastes delicious, dattebayo!"

"I'm glad you like it," Orochimaru pleasantly said and started eating his breakfast.

Did Orochimaru also cooked for Sasuke? Was that one of the reason that he stayed with him for three years?

Huh, such a loss that he never tasted the Snake Sannin's cooking before or he'd help him invade Konoha.

(Ha ha, he's kidding! Ha...) 

(Naruto really wished that he was.)

* * *

"Why must you choose everything at the shade of orange?" Orochimaru asked as if preventing a sigh and a face palm at Naruto's choices.

"Because yellow plus red is orange, 'ttebayo!" The Uzumaki proclaimed.

"And what does that mean?"

"It means, it's a great choice!" He answered and nodded to himself, agreeing how right he was.

The clerk entertaining them tried to dissaude the Uzumaki at his choices but the Sannin held a hand, signaling him to stop.

"Do you have orange for those clothes?" The Snake Sannin asked to the flustered clerk. The latter immediately nodded and went inside the storage to find those blasted shade of clothes.

Orochimaru looked down at his charge when he felt him tugging at his yukata. 

"Hey, hey."

"Hmm?" He raised an eyebrow.

The boy was hesitant but he decided to ask anyway, "are you sure you're going to buy me all those clothes? I mean... I can't pay for them but I'll... I'll try to look for a job to pay you—"

"I am pretty sure," Orochimaru interrupted what was about to be a long reasoning from the boy on how he would pay him back— and the child's five years old, what work would he find? "and you don't need to pay me back."

"Are you really sure—"

"I don't do things that I don't like, little fox." Orochimaru didn't know what came to him when he called the child with an endearment.

(Was he finally going insane? Is this his road to madness—)

"Why would you call me little fox, dattebayo?!" The blond Uzumaki asked, scrunching up his nose in confusion. The Sannin saw something like fear at his eyes before it was wiped off.

He wondered if it was his imagination playing at him...

"You have whiskers," the Sannin simply replied and sent his attention to the clerk walking towards them, holding a bundle of obnoxious clothes.

"Foxes aren't the only one who have one! There's cats or... Or kittens!"

Orochimaru remained silent and didn't find it himself to answer why he called him that. 

(It was one of those weird feelings concerning the child that Orochimaru was suddenly doing something he didn't understand. Something pushed him to call him that and he did.)

* * *

Naruto stared back at the man that was glaring holes at Orochimaru and he almost wanted to bare his fangs— one of his Kyuubi cloaks had the ability to grant him one.

_'Why are they looking at him like that?!'_ Naruto exclaimed at his head, waiting for Kurama to enlighten him.

**'Kit, have you ever looked at him?'** Kurama asked and did an impressive jaw-breaking yawn.

_'I have eyes, dattebayo!'_ He replied.

**'Then you should've noticed how different he was from everyone.'**

_'Everybody's different from everybody!'_ He reasoned, _'why do people shunned those who are different from them? It's always like this. Whenever or wherever, if people do not understand something, they either hate it or fear it. Why can't they just accept that?'_

**'That's the simple nature of humans.'**

Naruto furrowed his eyebrows in thought and the Sannin saw him did that.

"I don't like the way they're looking at you," Naruto suddenly said. Voice serious as another civilian passed by and gave them a wide berth and those cold, cold eyes.

Orochimaru was surprised at what he said because he faltered for a moment, tracks stopping as he looked down at Naruto. The blond Jinchuriki was staring back at him with determination.

"I'm used to it," Orochimaru answered and went back to walk.

"But you shouldn't have to," Naruto mumbled, remembering how he used to repeat Orochimaru's same exact words at himself when he was younger. All alone but surrounded by the coldness of others treatment at him and their harsh eyes.

The Sannin was more similar to him than he would have thought. He was like a Jinchuriki shunned by the village because they hated or feared him (or in Gaara's case, tried to make him gone by the people ~~his father~~ that he once trusted.) 

But the thing was, he wasn't a Jinchuriki... So, why? 

* * *

That night, Orochimaru was woken up by soft padding of feet outside his room. He took a glance at the door when it slightly slid open and the blond Uzumaki poked his head in.

"Uhm..."

He seemed hesitant at what he wanted to say but Orochimaru already knew what he wanted. Even though he hated sharing his bed with others because he never trusted them to not stab him at his sleep (Jiraiya and Tsunade were an exception to this because he got used to sharing bed rolls with them when they're at a mission and if someone did managed to creep at them while they were sleeping, those two would stab and broke the spine of whoever dared to even stab him while sleeping) or do something horrendous to him, Orochimaru sat at his bed and beckoned the child to enter.

The Uzumaki silently entered and closed the door behind him. He walked near Orochimaru's bed and the Sannin watched as the child was still hesitant to ask him.

"You can sleep here," Orochimaru suggested, thinking that the child must've been suffering from night terrors.

Maybe his terrors included memories of what had happened to him and to the old man that took care of him and if he was remembering Jiraiya's stories, his students in Ame also suffered from nightmares because they all watched their family die in front of them.

"I don't mean to impose..." and the blond looked down at his feet.

Orochimaru disliked seeing this timid version of the energetic child he knew. So, he opened his blankets and patted the empty space next to him.

The little fox looked up to stare at the space and with little to no hesitation, he jumped at the bed and snuggled at his blankets.

Orochimaru sighed as seconds passed, the child was already snoring deep in his sleep. He looked down at the child and the same warm feeling he always felt when he was with this child hit him.

His situation concerning the blond Uzumaki was an odd one. He still couldn't understand why he wanted to keep the child or _take care of him_. He did not understand his actions when it came to the child. And he's still curious as to what was happening to him. 

His relationship (can he call it a relationship? Was this what Jiraiya meant when he told Orochimaru that should form a bond with other people? What exactly was his relationship with this blond child?) with the little fox was too sudden. His actions were impulsive and was based on what this _strange warm feeling_ was... 

It was abrupt but...

_It wasn't bad._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I said that I won't be updating regularly, my brain lied to me. 
> 
> I suddenly had a thought that I wanted to see Reborn in real life and it's so weird because I wanted him to be in 2D form. Ciaossu~
> 
> Thank you for the warm reception this fic have received from all of you!! XOXO
> 
> — Segnor


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unexpected blond bomb warshocks the Hatake Clan.

_Somebody was following Sakumo._

He wasn't a seasoned shinobi and named as the White Fang for no reason.

Somebody was following him and he could feel it.

He first felt it when he was at the market buying extra eggplants for Kakashi because he knew how much his son loved the vegetables when he felt someone staring at his back and his presence was warm. This may be a normal occurrence to him ever since he was dubbed as a _'war hero_ ' but even though it has been minutes since he got out of the market and was walking towards the Hatake Compound, the warm presence was still there.

Sakumo took a sniff and he smelled a curious tint of _sunshine, fox and snakes_ in the air... And it was near him.

Sakumo swiveled back to face the presence following him and almost unsheathed the tanto strapped at his back when he was greeted by crystal blue eyes. 

"Uhm..." He pondered what to say because a blond child that looked like Kakashi's age was intensely staring at him.

" _Do you like dogs?_ " The child ask. 

"Yeah?" Sakumo answered with uncertainty, not knowing why this child was asking him that. 

"Are you sure?" The child tried to clarified. 

"Yes," Sakumo repeated but this time, very sure of himself. He liked dogs. His son's summon Pakkun was a pug and both Kakashi and Sakumo were very fond of the pup. 

Sakumo almost fidget when the child's staring got more intense (how was that possible?) and he waited what the blond child will do next. He almost sighed with relief when the child nodded and smiled at him. 

"That's good! I'm Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo!" The child introduced and gave him a victory pose with large grin. 

Maybe not all of the Uzumaki has red hair? 

  
The White Fang stared at Naruto's hair for a minute but accepted his claims when he didn't look like he was lying. 

"Hatake Sakumo," he introduced back and noticed that the child was surprised.

He expected that the child will recognize him by his surname and ask him about the 'cool things'— or as they normally dubbed it— he did but he wasn't expecting what came out of the blond Uzumaki's child. 

" _Do you have a house?_ " He asked as if concerned with his living space.

What...? 

"... Of course," he answered after a minute. 

The child sighed as if relieved with his answer, "that's good." 

Moments passed and Naruto kept staring oddly at him, grin wide spread and eyes twinkling— as if he's waiting for something.

"Where are your parents?" Sakumo asked, "do they know you're wandering alone?" 

"They're long dead, dattebayo." Naruto bluntly said as Sakumo winced. He did not expect that. 

Silence... 

Silence stretched. 

Crickets can now be heard. 

Dark grey eyes and crystal blue eyes were now having a staring contest. 

The blue eyes won. 

Silence... 

"Do you want to come with?" Sakumo asked when he didn't know what to say because he was out of his depth.

Normally, he was good with children, having a son himself, but with this strange child, he didn't know what to do. 

"I thought you'll never ask, 'ttebayo!" Naruto exclaimed and immediately held his right hand— his left hand was still holding the food he bought— and waved a hand at the road as if suggesting for him to lead the way.

_'This is odd,'_ Sakumo thought, _'I've never had a child treat me this way before.'_

* * *

"I thought this was abandoned!" Naruto exclaimed with shock.

Sakumo smiled sadly, "my son and I were the only one left in the clan."

"Oh," he heard Naruto said before he followed him inside the Hatake Compound.

Sakumo remembered how this compound used to bustle with life. But with how the war went, the Hatake were specialized in tracking so they were often sent out to infiltration. And as the First and Second Shinobi War went, their clan greatly diminished in number until he and Kakashi were the only members left of the Hatake Clan.

"Did the eggplants came with a freebie of a blond kid?"

Both he and Naruto looked up to the door when it opened and Kakashi was standing in front of them. 

The White Fang smiled at his son but before he got to speak, Naruto beamed and straight up hugged Kakashi. 

"Wow! You're tiny! And you already have your mask!" The blond child gushed at Sakumo's son who's looking spooked at the close contact. Naruto broke the hug to comb his hand at Kakashi's hair, "and your hair still defies gravity! That's good! Atleast that's still unchanged!"

Kakashi and Sakumo stared, bewildered at what just happened. Naruto was still beaming at his son and the latter rubbed his eyes, seemingly blinded by the Uzumaki's smile.

"Did that just happened?" Kakashi asked to no one in particular, clearly, he's out of his league with this one— just like how Sakumo felt earlier.

"Uhm," Sakumo said, trying to fix what will probably result to his son insulting this bubbly child, "Kakashi this is Uzumaki Naruto. Naruto this is my son."

"Nice to meet you!" (Wasn't it too late to say that? He already hugged his son like he was his long lost friend or something.) "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo!"

"I know, I heard what Dad said," Kakashi replied with irritation and there's still bewilderment in it. He took a step back to get back his personal space and looked up to Sakumo, "next time, you'll go to the market, I'll go with. I'll swat the pests away, you buy the eggplants."

"Why do you need to swat the pests away? There are no pests in the market," Naruto said, quite confused at Kakashi's words.

"He's a guest Kakashi," Sakumo told his son and ushered Naruto to come inside the house, "we don't call our guests pests."

Kakashi stared at him with challenging eyes, daring Sakumo to contradict what he believed was right. 

(Kakashi was right but he wouldn't use the word pests... _Stalker_ may be less harsh.)

* * *

"— and he's really good at cooking! But sometimes he forgets to eat because he just stares at me while I'm eating, so I'll tell him that what he cooked was yummy and he should also eat and so he will, 'ttebayo!" Naruto almost cheered and raised his hands in an excited way.

Sakumo eyed Kakashi's reaction and winced. Oh no.

"That's good," Kakashi said flippantly, "but why do you feel the need to tell me this? How will this benefit me in the future per se?"

Naruto laughed and leaned closer to Kakashi. Sakumo watched as Kakashi tried to back away but Naruto caught him in a hug while the blond laughed.

"You're funny, tiny sensei!"

Sakumo sighed. 

Were five years old supposed to be this strange? Kakashi's almost six and Sakumo was used to his son's attitude (blunt and frank) and almost everyone he knew told him that geniuses have their quirks. Was Naruto also a genius like Kakashi?

He must have...

His words were very articulate unlike other five-year-olds Sakumo knew.

But he was just so... _Blinding_.

Kakashi and Sakumo had to rub their eyes for three times for the past four hours that Naruto have spent on their household.

Kakashi's left eye twitch when Naruto called him _'tiny sensei'_ again. He has been calling Kakashi that and he refused to call his son by his first name because Naruto reasoned out that if he do that, it would be disrespectful— whatever he meant by that. Kakashi has been trying to dissuade Naruto in calling him with a nickname but the blond was an unmovable boulder. Sakumo has never met a child that has never cried by Kakashi's glares and bluntness before.

Also, Naruto has been regaling the father and son with stories of the Sannin, Orochimaru to be precise. Sakumo faulted the child's wild imaginations to some of his stories because some of them were really unbelievable like the Snake Sannin taking a liking to miso ramen or how he lets Naruto snuggle with him every night.

Sakumo really couldn't imagine this child with the Snake Sannin. He has been with the shinobi force for years but he never had an interaction with the Sannin before. But from what he had observed, Orochimaru-san was quite aloof and just like Kakashi, he never let someone near him. Of course, he didn't believe in any of the rumors that circulated with the citizens of the village, they're too farfetched and biased, but he really just couldn't imagine the Sannin with this child. He was an intelligent and a busy man that Sakumo could not visualize having an interaction with this whiskered, blond and far too energized kid. 

Maybe Orochimaru-san was also stalked by this kid and he has been idolizing the Sannin for far too long to have those vivid imaginations? 

Naruto's a strange child. 

"— and he lets me sleep at his bed even though I have my own room, 'ttebayo!" 

_Ah_ , back to the tales of Orochimaru-san again. 

"You're staying with him?" Sakumo asked, kindly humoring the child's claims. 

"Yup, dattebayo! I've been with him for three days!" Naruto nodded and Kakashi escaped from the hug but the blond caught him in another one, "I like hugging you, don't move, tiny sensei!" 

"You're a knucklehead!" Kakashi finally snapped, his patience finally draining. Sakumo noted how long it took his patience meter to snap and was proud at his son's perseverance. 

Sakumo stood up from his seat to repair the damage Kakashi did to Naruto but again, the child surpasses his imagination.

"Really?" Naruto asked, "does that mean I'm now your friend?"

_Huh?_

How did this conversation... 

Sakumo sighed. Naruto was a good kid. He really was.

_He's just so unpredictable._

"Why would you want to be my friend?" Kakashi glared and extracted himself from Naruto's iron grip hugs. (Sakumo experienced it first hand.)

"Because you're loyal?" Naruto asked like it was the most factual thing he knew.

Sakumo and Kakashi stared at the Uzumaki child like he grew a second pair of head. Thankfully, they were saved from Kakashi's snapping by a knock from the door. Sakumo stood up.

"I'll get that," he told the two. Naruto nodded at him and Kakashi was still staring weirdly at the unpredictable child.

Sakumo went to the entrance hall and slid the door open. What greeted him was a person he wasn't expecting would step foot in the Hatake Compound and was the topic of the household's and their guest's earlier conversation.

"Hatake-san, good evening," the Snake Sannin greeted with a cool expression.

(It's evening already?!)

"Orochimaru-san," Sakumo said, gathering himself from his shock, "what can I do for you?"

"I was looking for—" he was cut off by an excited yell.

"How did you find me?!" Naruto asked, dashing behind Sakumo and jumping at Orochimaru's side to glance up at him and bounced up and down next to him. 

Orochimaru gave the blond a small smile and patted his head. 

(This was a really surprising turn of events.)

"You told me you'll be here," Orochimaru told the leech clinging at him.

"I did?" Naruto asked.

"He did?" Sakumo asked.

Orochimaru raised an eyebrow at the both of them. He took a step back and slightly bowed his head towards Sakumo. 

"Thank you for taking care of him, Hatake-san," the Sannin said in a pleasant tone, "we shall be going now."

"Bye, Sakumo-shiro! Say bye to tiny sensei to me!"

Sakumo nodded dumbly and watched Orochimaru stepped out of the compound's lands while the blond Uzumaki was at his side. He passively closed the door, replying what in the name of Kami was that.

Wait—

Did Naruto just called him Sakumo- _white_?

What kind of nickname was that?!

Sakumo was so out of his league with that child. 

And looking at Kakashi who was looking at an empty space when he entered the living room and was now drinking his tea through his mask, he was also in a shock. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little trivia, it's midnight at my country when I was writing this because my brain somehow suddenly can't function while I'm inside the house. So, here I am at our backyard, chilling at the hammock, wishing for the mosquitoes to stay the fuck away from me (I may survive the virus but good luck with the malaria and the dengue dude) and hoping that when the clock hits 3, a ghost won't stare at me while I write.
> 
> My friend told me that at 3, when you suddenly find yourself waking up, a ghost was staring at you. But don't worry, she said, it's the ghost of your dead relatives— LIKE THAT CHANGES ANYTHING YOU SADISTIC WITCH! She knows how I hated ghosts, ghost movies in general and how I have an insomia but she still told me that!
> 
> Enough about me being a sissy and I just wanted to let you all know how thankful I am for the review and for liking this fic.
> 
> Take care everyone! Don't forget to take your vitamins, drink fluids, sanitize and always keep your social distance! 
> 
> — Segnor


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto joined Kakashi to meet with his sensei, it did not end well.

"And where are you off to?" Orochimaru asked as he saw the Uzumaki running around and tying a dark purple scarf on his neck over his orange jacket.

It became one of Naruto's favorite clothes when Orochimaru bought it on a whim, thinking that it would suit the little fox, clearly, he didn't think that purple would clash with orange but somehow, the Uzumaki managed to carry it well. 

"Can I please join Kakashi with his sensei?" Naruto asked, staring at Orochimaru with his big blue eyes.

Something in his eyes made Orochimaru sighed and agree, "be back before dinner, don't get hurt and if his sensei doesn't treat you well, tell him that I'll deal with him personally."

Orochimaru thought back to how Jiraiya bragged about his student getting a student for his own. He wasn't actually listening at that time but he caught the snippets of Jiraiya telling him how that bumbling student of his would teach the Hatake genius. That child whom his kid was fond of and repeatedly told him had became his friend over their first meeting which Orochimaru was surprised of— he didn't know that it was possible to be friends with someone _that_ fast. 

"Uhn!" Naruto nodded, "see you later, dattebayo!"

But before he ran out of the door, he threw himself at Orochimaru and squeezed him in a hug. The Sannin didn't have the time to react because the blond extracted himself from Orochimaru and was already gone. 

He stared at the place where the child occupied and placed a hand at his chest.

He still needs to ask someone, preferably Tsunade, on what he was feeling. He wasn't certain if he's sick or he caught a virus when he was at Kumo but this _phenomenon_ only happened wherever the blond smiled at him or do something unexpected such as hugging him or just staring at him with those wonderful eyes.

Was this condition terminal?

Naruto has been staying with him for the past four days and he had learned so many things about the blond and also about ramen. Orochimaru didn't know that there were a variety of ramen flavors and Naruto introduced it to him one by one, he spilled facts about ramen as if he did a research and published a paper on it. The Sannin also learned that the little fox liked gardening in that one time that he helped Orochimaru when he was tending the garden. He clearly enjoyed Orochimaru's cooking, that's why the Sannin had to make a mental note about not getting lost on his studies to cook a meal on time and feed the small child.

He liked many things and disliked the cold _more than anything_. Orochimaru didn't understand why the child hated it but he didn't ask, thinking that it was something personal or will make him remember bad memories aligned with the cold. 

For a child his age who lost his home and the old man that took care of him, he hadn't seen the little fox cry aside from that time when they were traveling to Konoha. But he had seen the faraway look that sometimes Naruto possessed and the sad smile that didn't quite reached his blue eyes. A look that did not belong to a five-year-old child.

~~Orochimaru wanted to keep the child for himself.~~

He wanted to know everything that concerns the child. He almost wished that Uzumaki Kushina would not come back so Naruto could stay with him forever. But he knew what a wishful thinking it was. And that part of his brain, told him that the child didn't belong to him. That the blond would be more happy to be with his family.

The Sannin didn't have the right to claim him. 

_He didn't have._

Even though there's a part of him that screamed when he thought that the little fox wouldn't be staying with him for much longer, Orochimaru could not help the inevitable fall out that would result when that happened. 

Because as much as he didn't understand what was happening, he knew loneliness more than anyone. (And he didn't want to be alone again at his house when he knew the experience of having someone living with him.) 

"Tch."

He gave the scroll he was reading his utmost attention because there's no use thinking about that now, the child was still with him, and he'd savor that time until... He would be off to someone that has rightful claims over him. 

(He certainly didn't remember his slip up when in his mind, he called Naruto as his child.) 

* * *

"Why are you even here?" Kakashi-sensei— tiny Kakashi-sensei greeted when he saw Naruto running towards him.

"Sakumo-shiro told me that you'll meet with your sensei today and I can come with, 'ttebayo!" He babbled as he sat next to the empty space Kakashi was sitting at. Naruto adjusted his scarf— that made him feel _funny_ when Orochimaru gave it to him and he decided that he should always wear it— and gave a wolfish grin to Tiny Sensei. 

"When did he told you?"

"When I was at your house yesterday," he shrugged his shoulders.

"He didn't say anything about you being welcome to join in!" Kakashi hissed, two visible eyes glaring at him. "If he did, I would remember it and I would object because I don't want you here. You're annoying and bothersome."

Naruto looked up, surprise visible at his expression. Kakashi smirked behind his mask, thinking that he finally got to that thick head of his that he didn't want to see or be near the blond.

"Did you just spoke to me for three whole sentences?!" Naruto exclaimed and held three fingers, "that's the longest you've ever said something to me, dattebayo! That's an improvement!"

Kakashi groaned, _defeated_.

Naruto was still celebrating that tiny Kakashi-sensei was finally opening up to him.

He was really surprised when he met Kakashi-sensei's tiny version. He looked very much like what he imagine his sensei's child version would be but his attitude really surprised him. Gone was the laid back and easy going attitude of his sensei and it was replaced by this bristling like a cat and serious six years old. Even back at Naruto's original childhood, this was his first time meeting a Kakashi who's so serious that Naruto was afraid he would spout shinobi guidelines while making Naruto memorize each and every one of them. 

So, Naruto made it his mission to befriend this bristling like a cat tiny sensei and turn him back into the lazy, eye-smiling Kakashi-sensei he knew. And if he won't turn back... Naruto would try and try again to make him loosen up.

Besides, he remembered what Kakashi once told him before. 

( _"Maa... We could've been brothers,"_ _Kakashi-sensei said as he leaned in the open window of his office._

_Naruto's brows furrowed, "what do you mean, dattebayo?"_

_"Minato-sensei practically adopted me when my father died. Kushina-nee-san told me when she was carrying you that I could be your big brother. But things happened... And I was not at the brightest places when they died... I should have been there for you, Naruto. I shouldn't have wallowed in my guilt when you needed me the most... I'm sorry."_ )

**'Naruto.'**

_'Hm?'_

**'Someone's coming,'** Kurama said in an irritated voice. Who could've irritate him that much...? 

Naruto caught a glimpse of a flash of yellow in the side of his eyes as a person flickered in front of Kakashi and him.

"Kakashi, you're early."

Standing in front of Naruto, Namikaze Minato beamed a wide smile at Kakashi. The Yondaime Hokage (to be) was wearing a Jounin flak jacket and a Konoha hitai-ate. The one thing that caught Naruto's attention the most was his sky blue eyes. Its sclera wasn't black from Edo Tensei— a reminder to Naruto that standing in front of him was his Tou-chan. Alive and breathing.

_His Tou-chan was alive—_

"And who's this with you?" Minato asked and glanced at Naruto.

_— and he didn't know Naruto._

Unbidden tears sprang forth and he felt himself started hiccuping. 

Both Hatake and Namikaze was now sporting a wide eye, looking at him with shock and not knowing what to do. 

"W-was something wrong?" Minato asked, frozen on his position.

Naruto shook his head and gathered chakra at his feet. Even if his chakra control sucks at this age, desperation to be out of this position made him vanish in a shunshin.

(He really need to control his chakra.)

* * *

Minato remained staring at the empty spot of the blond kid.

Did he just... Vanished in a shunshin?!

(A five-year-old kid?!) 

He looked at Kakashi and he was surprised when his student stared at him with pity.

"Have I said something wrong?" 

"You're dead," Kakashi said in a monotonous voice.

Wha...?

"Kakashi?" Minato asked completely shocked at the threat his student threw at him.

"You made him cry," Kakashi said in an explanation, "he lives with Orochimaru-sama."

"He what?" He asked, confused why that kid was living with the Sannin when he remembered how his sensei liked to whine about _Orochimaru-sama being a loner._

"Dad said that if something happened to that idiot sunshine, Orochimaru-sama won't hesitate to commit genocide. _You're dead_ , sensei," Kakashi helpfully added. 

Minato remembered how he once saw the Snake Sannin execute someone at the battle field and felt his name being written at the memorial stone.

_'Here lies Namikaze Minato, beheaded, gutted and burned.'_

He's doomed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments and kudos the last chapter received!! 
> 
> SHORT UPDATE! 
> 
> I know Naruto suddenly crying when he saw Minato seemed like an OOC part for him, but there's an explanation for that in the next chapter. Please don't sue me.
> 
> From at this point onwards, Naruto will start meeting other characters!!! I'm all fired up! 
> 
> I planned to focus on this fic and set aside my original works for the time being. I'm enjoying writing this and I'll take the opportunity to write until I still have the idea in my mind of what'll happen in this one. The problem with me is that I write fast, I don't bother to check my mistakes or re-read what I have made, but I'll spare a time for that for the improvement of this fic. 
> 
> Thank you all for the support!! 
> 
> — Segnor


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uchiha Fugaku's worst day.

Uchiha Fugaku was having a bad day. 

It started when he woke up with a pounding headache from overusing his Sharingan at the mission he just finished. He went to the hospital to get his monthly physical evaluation— and because the Hokage told him to get some medication for his headache— when out of everyone that will test him, it was an old Senju, one of Tsunade-sama's close relatives.

The Senju berated him for overusing his eyes and he had no choice but to listen to the crazy man when he just saw almost pound a man for not listening to him. Clearly, the Senju all had a temper and Fugaku was slightly thankful that it wasn't the Slug Princess that was evaluating him because he wasn't sure if he would get out of the hospital with more injuries than what was necessary. Since the Senju Princess left the village, patients in the hospital actually lessened because almost fifty percent of it was because of the medic nin herself. 

The Senju dismissed him after the evaluation was done and gave him medications and lollipops for being a _good boy—_ treating him like he's a damn three-year-old.

He went to the Police station and his father gave him an immediate case that he must finish within two hours. Of course, he finished it in time, but not before being drenched to death by an elder civilian lady who wouldn''t believe that he's not stalking her granddaughter but he's just there because a criminal was living at their apartment building. Fugaku almost burned the criminal to crisp when he finally apprehended him but reminded himself that his father wouldn't like it if news got out that he fried someone because he couldn't control his ire.

His headache got worse as he got into the station and handed the crimimal he caught. A fight broke out between a civilian lady who filed her husband cheating on her. It was so, noisy, it grated on Fugaku's head, and he watched with irritation as members of the Police force tried to stop the fight and the loud mouth of the lady.

Fugaku wouldn't tell anyone that he fled and escaped from the station because he was feeling sick and tired. He flopped on the park bench he saw and despite being the Uchiha Clan heir, he covered his eyes with his arms and went to sleep. If that stiff Hiashi saw him now, Fugaku would die of embarrassment. 

Here he was, the Wicked Eye, Uchiha Fugaku, drenched and defeated by a civilian old lady and a headache and sleeping at an empty park bench.

* * *

**'That was illogical,'** Kurama commented after Naruto landed and appeared in a park.

_'I know! I was just so happy to see him alive but when I realized that of course he didn't know me, I don't know why I cried, 'ttebayo!'_ Naruto explained and wiped the tears from his cheeks.

He still couldn't stop crying and he could not even think of the fact that he just did a shunshin and now he's feeling so tired. He tried channeling his chakra before at Orochimaru's house, when he was sure that he's alone and no one would thought of how weird it was to have a five-year-old trying to channel chakra and he was so bad at it.

(Kurama told him to be patient about it because his body's still adjusting because his chakra in his seventeen-year-old body was transfered from this chibi version.)

(He even told him to be thankful that Kurama's helping him keep the chakra calm in his body or so help him— he would suddenly explode because of his large chakra reserves.)

**'Maybe you're experiencing urges that children have,'** Kurama said.

_'What do you mean, dattebayo?'_

**'Well, based on my observation when you were a child, you have a hard time suppressing your emotions at the time.'**

_'You mean I was a crybaby?'_

**'Kind of. You always yelled at the children who won't let you play ninja with them and at the vendors who accused you of stealing— which was an understandable response. And now that you are in a child's body, it's not just your chakra that would have to adjust, but also your ability to harness an intense emotion. You were happy when you saw Minato and it's understandable, from a human's point of view, to feel heartbroken when a precious loved ones don't recognized them... Are you seeing my point?'**

_'Kurama, you're so good at this, dattebayo! When did you learned all this stuff?'_ Naruto mentally snickered. 

**'Someone has to do the thinking for the both of us,'** Kurama grumbled then he snapped. **'Idiot! Think of what I said!'**

Naruto wiped his cheeks for the last time and tried to understand the Kyuubi's word. His eyes watered again when he finally made sense of what Kurama has been trying to explain to him.

_'You mean my mind will also turned to a five-year-old?'_ He whined and kept rubbing at his cheeks because he would not stop crying.

(Stupid baby body.)

**' _Idiot_ , you're mind still belongs to a seventeen-year-old but you technically didn't have the right understanding for a seventeen-year-old in the first place. What I meant was... You will have urges, kit. Urges that children have that you may or may not act on.'**

Naruto felt that Kurama insulted him but he didn't know why that is, so he would ignore it. He calmed down and hit his fist in his palm, _'why didn't you started with that, dattebayo? You made it hard to understand!'_

Naruto absent-mindedly sat on a park bench while still talking to Kurama and yelped when a hand reached out to his shoulders. He stared with wide eyes at the pale man with black eyes who's looking intently at him. Naruto was creeped out at the way the man's eyes were red rimmed and how he was now glaring at Naruto like he just stole noodles off of his ramen— which Naruto would never do to someone! (That's an unforgivable crime!) 

Without thinking about it, Naruto tried to let his shoulders go and yelled, "help me! Child molester! Help! HELP ME!"

**'See?'** Kurama asked in an amused voice, **'urges.'**

* * *

Fugaku didn't know how he got in this situation.

He really didn't.

He was pretty sure that he had atleast half an hour nap at the park bench but he quickly woke up when he heard sniffling and he expected an enemy attack. He immediately stood up and grabbed the owner of the offending noise and he was greeted by a blond kid who looked up at him with a stupefied expression.

He looked like a puppy who got caught stealing his owner's shoe and Fugaku swore that he did not just thought of that! His mind was clearly sleep-muddled and he desperately needed some sleep.

Why hadn't he decided to come home and sleep in his room and not at this park bench?

While he was lost in his thoughts, the child screamed, "help me! Child molester! Help! HELP ME!"

He immediately unhanded the child when his mind registered what he just did. 

Did the child just called him a child molester?!

"I am not a molester," Fugaku huffed in an offended voice and leveled a stare at the child.

The blond child scooted away from him and hugged his arms close to his body, "oh, yeah?! That's exactly what molesters would say!"

Fugaku glared at the child as the child glared at him back. 

And because of how truly lost he was at what was happening, he had not expected an ANBU suddenly materializing in front of them and _manhandling_ Fugaku and before he got the time to react, he was already standing in front of the Hokage.

This is a very bad day. 

* * *

"You mean he's not a molester?" The child asked, eying Fugaku with distrust. "Are you sure? Because he looks like one."

"We do not throw insults at someone we do not know," the Snake Sannin lightly said from his seat next to the blond child. 

The blond kid looked up at the Sannin and nodded, "okay, I'll throw insult at people I know."

Fugaku watched from his seat as the Snake Sannin patted the boy's hair— as if satisfied that he understood what he was trying to imply— and as the Sandaime Hokage watched the scene in front of him with an amused expression.

It was a surprising turn of events when Fugaku was suddenly transfered at the Hokage's office and the blond child immediately jumped at the Hokage and crawled in his lap. He watched with befuddlement as the blond kid tattled at the Hokage how he was almost molested by this 'grumpy man grumpier than a fox' and of course he tried defending himself— with elegance deserving of a clan heir— that he was just surprised by the blond kid and thought of him as an enemy.

The Hokage understood his explanations and told the kid on his lap— who was surprisingly and _unsurprisingly_ an Uzumaki, with the Uzumaki, he shouldn't be surprised by their ability to get Fugaku into trouble— that he wasn't a child molester.

Minato and his genius student was also there because they reported to the Hokage that the Uzumaki suddenly vanished using a shunshin (an A-rank technique that was somehow used by a five-year-old kid, was he a genius?) and Minato wanted to immediately find the kid because he didn't want to die.

(Fugaku thought that if he really wanted to find the child, Minato should've tracked him. He's a known genius but most of the times, _he's an idiot.)_

When Fugaku wondered what Minato meant, the Snake Sannin entered the office and he went to get the kid on the Hokage's lap and placed him next to his seat. Fugaku was watching how the Sannin calmly asked the Uzumaki what happened and the latter told him word by word what he exactly told the Hokage.

When the two were busy, Fugaku asked what's the relationship with the Sannin and the blond Uzumaki and he saw at the corner of his eye how Minato sweat dropped when the Sandaime replied that he was Orochimaru-sama's ward. 

And now that it was all cleared up, Fugaku was wondering why this blond Uzumaki was now insulting him and how the Snake Sannin was not letting him insult people he didn't know.

His attention got back to the present when he felt the heavy gaze of the Sannin. 

"I apologized for the trouble, Uchiha-san, I'm sure my ward didn't mean to disrupt your afternoon," the Sannin said in a pleasant voice.

"Uchiha?" Fugaku heard the boy whispered to himself and looked at Fugaku with some kind of an understanding in his eyes, "that means you're not a molester because you're an Uchiha. I'm sorry, dattebayo!" 

He didn't know what that meant and he wasn't willing to know what it meant and he would not talk to the child if had the choice, so he just nodded politely. The child grinned at him, all unfriendliness and disbelief gone in that moment. 

The Uzumaki was a deep sea trouble and Fugaku wasn't willingly drown in that but of course, Minato would— he's Minato after all.

"Why did you cried earlier?" Minato asked and all the attention of the room was turned into him. He fidgeted and scratched the back of his neck with discomfort when Fugaku saw the Sannin was giving him a cold stare. "I mean... You cried when you saw me... Why was that?"

The Sannin must have been having an enjoyable time tormenting the Namikaze because he continued the cold staring for seconds too long before he gave his ward his attention. 

"What did he mean?" Orochimaru-sama asked when his ward didn't answer Minato's question. "You cried, why?" 

"He looked like someone I knew," the blond Uzumaki mumbled.

"Who?" Minato asked, _poor, poor dense man._

"He's already dead, it doesn't matter anymore," the Uzumaki bluntly said and his cheerful energy was replaced by sullenness. 

This was the worst day ever, but atleast, Fugaku was enjoying watching Minato trying to ignore the three pair of glares he received from his student, the Sandaime Hokage and the one of the Legendary Sannin.

"Namikaze," the Sannin called.

"... Yes?" Minato asked with hesitation as he fidgeted in his place. 

"Do you know what's the use of the parietal lobe in the brain?" Orochimaru-sama calmly asked but Fugaku could feel the threat in it. 

"... Yes." 

"Good. Then, I won't have to introduce you to it." 

(Fugaku would not be surprised if news came out that the Namikaze died in an unexplainable cause.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LATE UPDATE! I have three drafts for this chapter but I felt this was the most appropriate to use. Fugaku was 'demanding' me to write him and I can't deny him of that because he's actually fun to write!!! 
> 
> The parietal lobe is involved in interpreting pain and touch in the body.
> 
> I'm sorry if I haven't been able to reply to all the comments because suddenly, my talent at socializing ran away but trust me, I loved it and I appreciated it when I read all your thoughts about my works. I'm really sorry. 
> 
> I won't get tired for thanking all of you from how you received this fic of mine. Thank you for the reviews and the kudos!
> 
> — Segnor


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Home.

Naruto stood up from his bed and tightened the yukata that Orochimaru lent him when he first arrived in his house and got out of his room, when he didn't feel like sleeping. He walked silently on the empty hallways of the house and perked up when he saw the sliding door leading to the engawa. He went outside and sat at the wooden floor, a chill ran through his spine when the cold wind blew and the maple trees swayed alongside it.

_'Kurama? Are you still awake?'_ He asked delicately, trying not to rouse the Kyuubi up if he really was sleeping.

**'What is it?'** Kurama mumbled and Naruto heard him yawn at his mind.

_'Nothing, just checking on you, dattebayo.'_

Naruto felt Kurama was unimpressed with his answer so he grimaced. 

**'You're thinking about home?'**

Suddenly, when he thought of home, it wasn't the lonely apartment he was living at the Konoha of the future, but what his mind made was a picture of Orochimaru silently humming and Naruto was swaying his feet, watching the solemn expression of the Sannin as he cooked a meal for the two of them. 

His forehead furrowed but before he got to think what that mental image meant, Kurama interrupted his thoughts. 

**'Or are you still thinking about your parents?'** Kurama guessed.

"Yeah," Naruto said outloud and stared at the maple trees, "I mean, it's weird seeing Tou-chan alive but not recognizing me. I understand it but it's still..."

**'Time travel's a bitch,'** Kurama summarized and Naruto laughed out loud at how the Kyuubi sounded. **'You have to get used to it, kit, you'll see a lot of people who won't recognize you. Be thankful that you didn't time travel to your twelve-year-old self because that'll be a total bitch.'**

_'What's got you talking like that, dattebayo?'_ Naruto chuckled but sobered immediately, _'yeah... That'll be just sad. I mean, imagine me going after Sasuke-teme again when I have just made him decide that Konoha will always be his home.'_

Kurama remembered those years and he wasn't amused at the example Naruto said. Angsty and surly Uchiha would always be a pain to remember.

_'But it'll all be better, dattebayo! I will make sure that Sasuke-teme won't even think of abandoning Konoha! We'll make it all better!'_ Naruto cheered.

He smiled at himself when he imagined seeing them again for the future. Oooh! Maybe if this is all over, he'd be Team Seven's sensei! That would be so cool!

**'About that.'**

_'About what?'_

**'Your plan to save every Kami damned humans there are,'** Kurama sarcastically threw, **'what's your plan about it?'**

_'I haven't thought about that,'_ Naruto realized and smacked his forehead.

**'Of course, you haven't. You're an idiot,'** the Kyuubi stated as if it was a fact. 

Naruto took offense but didn't protest. He tried thinking and when he came up with a plan, he became giddy.

_'Should we start hunting Zetsu, then?'_ He suggested. _'I'm sure that we can track him and stop his plans before it comes into fruition, dattebayo!'_

**'Fruition? Since when have you used the word fruition and knew the meaning of it?'** The Kyuubi insulted him and rolled his eyes, **'if that was so simple, kit, I would already do that for you. But what about Madara? What are you planning to do to him?'**

_'Talk to him?'_ The blond Jinchuriki asked in a confused tone.

**'He's beyond talking at this point, kit. As you humans like to put it, he's batshit crazy and I believe he's already senile. Even if you have some kind of a weird talent in talking your enemy until they changed, I don't think you can do that to Madara. You can't _salvage_ him.'**

_'Why not, 'ttebayo?'_

**'You idiot. He's almost a hundred years old, he lived in a cage and Kami knows if he still saw the sun, he has an aloevera plant for a company, he's planning day in and day out how he can enslave humanity and bring utopia to the Five Great Nations. And the face of the man he once called his greatest friend glued to his abdomen. Now, think, Naruto. Please use your brain and tell me if you can save that person.'**

Naruto again grimaced after a minute of thinking.

(His brain hurt.)

He remembered Edo Tensei Madara yelling at the battlefield how he will complete his plan and nothing will ever stop him in finally creating peace for the Five Great Nations. Sakura told him one day how ironic it was that Madara accomplished some part of his goal. He did brought peace over the Five Nations but he failed at casting the Ultimate Genjutsu at them. She told Naruto that even though Madara's plans and actions brought them pain, it did cemented the peace that four generations of war tried to acquire for the shinobi nations. Sakura-chan literally applauded Madara for his plan then threw thousand curses for the dead Uchiha because of lives wasted. Naruto was _so_ afraid for his sake of that time, thinking that maybe Sakura-chan really lost it, because he didn't approached Sakura-chan for the length of a week. 

(Just the thought of Sakura-chan and Madara tag-teaming was enough for Naruto to seek Sasuke-teme and join him for a while on his _redemption trip_.) 

He shook his head of those thoughts because he still needed to answer Kurama. 

He slowly asked, _'can't we atleast give him a proper funeral, 'ttebayo?'_

The Kyuubi grunted and Naruto wasn't sure if thay was a 'no' or a 'yes' but the Kyuubi didn't react by roaring at him or throwing death threats, so he left it at that. They would talk about it next time when it came to it.

It came as a big surprise to him when he found out that the Uchiha Clan were still alive. He forgot about the Massacre at some point and was truly shocked when he met Uchiha Fugaku and he accused him of child molestation. Of course when he found out that he was an Uchiha, he immediately erased his suspicion. The clan may have the tendency to want world domination and have a certain type of craziness, but he knew that they wouldn't stoop so low as to _molest_ someone. Based on his relationship with some of the members he met, they're snooty entitled teme and that act would be so _below_ them. 

(The only Uchiha he knew that wasn't a snooty entitled teme was Itachi. The man wasn't a full blown teme but he sure do know how to apply _creepiness_ when he forced a crow through Naruto's throat like it's some kind of a greeting for the person he met for the second time!) 

**'What about Danzo?'**

"Shit," Naruto cursed loudly and snapped his head back to look at the door if Orochimaru was there. He glanced back at the swaying trees when he was sure that no one caught him cursing but his body was still tight as a bow.

**'If my recollection of the timeline was correct, it was in this time that Danzo started his plans for the Uchiha. He already lost his eye at this point,'** Kurama explained.

Naruto fought back the bile rising in his throat when he remembered reading reports about Danzo's experimentation of the Uchiha. Sasuke-teme was so wrathful at that time that all Team 7 gave the Uchiha a wide berth, afraid that if they did somethinc wrong, they would set the Uchiha off and he'd decide to fuck it and burn the village with his Susanoo.

_'Do you think Orochimaru was already...'_ Naruto hesitantly said, suddenly afraid to know the answer.

**'No, I don't feel evil reeking on him, kit, he's not there yet,'** Kurama denied his suspicion. 

Naruto took a deep breath and tried to calm himself.

Sasuke told them that Orochimaru wasn't part of the Kekai Genkai harvesting of the Uchiha. Because when Sasuke-teme asked his former sensei if he was aware of what happened to their clan, the Snake Sannin was clearly surprised and the last Uchiha was using his Sharingan at that time so he knew that the Sannin wasn't lying to him.

Sasuke-teme spent some time with his former sensei talking about things and that's where Orochimaru told him that his insanity stemmed with Danzo making him experiment at children. The Sannin told his former student how geniuses always have a _slight_ flaw in them.

Senju Tobirama had his _hidden obsession_ with life and death that he made a technique that can ressurect someone, a very dangerous technique he developed that made the Shodaime Hokage sealed it to never be used and a technique that made forgotten grief rose again as people saw their dead loved ones at the Fourth Shinobi War.

Hatake Kakashi had his tendency to blame himself for the shit the world threw at him. When Naruto found out the scope of Kakashi-sensei's guilt, he was no medic nin that specializes in the field of the human mind but he knew that wasn't healthy. Kakashi-sensei told him some of his ANBU missions when he felt that he really can't shoulder his feelings anymore, Naruto was horrified to find out that he was so suicidal at that point in life and he never really got to let go of that part of him. He was _obsessed with suicidal missions_ that Hokage-jiji had to cut him off of ANBU and give him a Genin team to somehow help him prevent ending his life. 

Uchiha Itachi had loved his brother that _bordered on obsession_ that he chose to kill all of his clan members just so he could protect him and the village itself, the Nidaime wasn't wrong when he said that an Uchiha's love can make them do anything.

And Orochimaru had his _questionable_ morality. He experimented on children and he was _obsessed with immortality_. 

(The only genius— should he call them prodigy?— he knew that was slightly normal was Namikaze Minato, his Tou-chan. But maybe that's because he didn't really got to know his father and he had never read anything that mentioned something bad about him. All he knew when he was a kid was that he was a hero and Naruto idolized him for it. He did meet him two times at his original timeline and found out that he was okay, he wasn't obsessed, suicidal, creepy or has a questionable morality. But based on his observation when he met his Tou-chan at the Hokage's office, he was kind of an idiot.) 

So, when Danzo asked Orochimaru to do some work for him, and he unthinkingly accepted it, he lost all the morality he had and slowly made a descent on insanity. 

Because at that time, Orochimaru had no one to stop him. Jiraiya left the village again to completely become the village spy and Tsunade also followed, the two never once looking back at their teammate. He didn't have someone to guide his almost absent morality and tell him that what he was doing was wrong and unethical. 

Orochimaru knew loneliness as to how Kakashi, Sasuke and Naruto would define it. 

Naruto took a deep breath, his shoulders sagging at what he's thinking. 

After spending a week at Orochimaru, he learned a lot about the Sannin. Unlike the one he knew at the future, Naruto observed that the Sannin was very _compassionate_. He didn't know it or notice it for himself, but Naruto did.

Because what would explain Orochimaru suddenly deciding to let him stay with him? Cook food for him? Buy clothes for him? Let him sleep at his bed when Naruto was having a nightmare? Explaining things that Naruto didn't understand? Patting Naruto's head and making him feel so comfortable? 

What could explain why the Sannin was doing that when Orochimaru wasn't even sometimes aware of the things he did for Naruto?

_Orochimaru wasn't bad._

(Not yet.) 

(And he wouldn't be if Naruto has a say to it.) 

He was actually a good person but no one knows it because they were busy giving him those cold stare! 

Another cold wind blew and Naruto couldn't fight off an involuntary shiver.

A warm cloth was wrapped at his neck and he suddenly found himself staring at the Sannin who was looking at the moon.

"The moon's beautiful tonight," Orochimaru said, "don't you think so?" 

Naruto craned his neck to eye the moon. It was a full moon and Naruto realized that's the reason why it wasn't so dark here at the engawa. The moon was giving light at the maple tree and at the koi pond of the backyard that made the scene in front of Naruto almost like a surreal painting.

"It is," Naruto agreed. 

"What are you doing here?" Orochimaru asked, voice laced with concern, "aren't you cold?" 

Naruto touched the purple scarf at his neck, "not anymore." 

The Sannin caught the action and he gave Naruto one of his warm smile he always wore when he was pleasantly surprised at something the blond Jinchuriki did. He stretched his hand and Naruto instantly moved his head to meet the Sannin's hand. The Snake Sannin comb his hair through Naruto's hair and he felt his eyelids got heavy. 

"Should we go back to sleep now?" 

"Uhn, dattebayo!" Naruto answered and yawned. 

The Sannin stopped petting Naruto's head and waited for Naruto to stand up so they both could get inside. Remembering what Kurama said about childish urges, Naruto raised his arms and stared at the Sannin's golden eyes. Without hesitation, Orochimaru scooped him up in his arms and he placed him at his chest.

Naruto found the Sannin warm, so he snuggled deeper at the older man's body. 

Sasuke-teme told him that he threw his love so easily at people _undeserving_ of it. But Naruto retorted that he wasn't doing that even if he saw Kakashi-sensei and Sakura-chan nodding at the background, completely agreeing at Sasuke-teme's observation. 

Maybe he threw it around so easily.

Maybe Naruto loved people easily but he didn't believe that he gave his love to the people who didn't deserve it. 

He always gave his love so easily to the people who _greatly_ _deserved_ it. 

He gave it to Hokage-jiji when he spared his time to meet up with Naruto, to Teuchi-san and Ayame-san who served him a hot dish on a cold and lonely day, to Iruka-sensei who once saw him as a demon but accepted and recognized that he wasn't, to Kakashi-sensei who never lost his patience at Naruto, to Sakura-chan who finally saw him and always prioritized his health, to Sasuke-teme who shared the same loneliness as him and has now heard Naruto after years of trying to reach to him, to Ero-sennin who at his short time, taught thousands of lessons to Naruto that he'll always treasure and to Tsunade-baachan who always believed that he could fulfill his dreams. 

Those are the people he truly valued and gave his love so easily. But now that he's in the past, someone made it at his list and he believed that the person who he now loved, deserved it. 

Because who wouldn't love a person that showed him _kindness_ even without knowing who he was or what he was? 

Who wouldn't love the person who invited him in his home and expected nothing from him?

Why wouldn't he love the person who made him feel completely accepted and loved in return?

_Why wouldn't Naruto love Orochimaru when he was the person who he thought of at the word 'home?'_

Naruto knew that it wasn't the childish urges that made him broke into tears and burrowed his head at the Sannin's neck. He took a sniff of the Sannin's scent and his brain registered _safe_ , _warm_ and ~~_homehomehomehomehome_~~.

Before entering the house, he caught a glimpse of the moon. 

_It wasn't red._

(All of this was real and he could never go back home.)

(Because this was _his_ now.)

If he needed to kill Danzo just so he could keep _this_ , for once, Naruto would selfishly do it for _himself_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omake*  
> Kurama: you'll murder Danzo at first sight?  
> Naruto: uhn!  
> Kurama: who are you and what did you do to Naruto?  
> Naruto: ... blood?  
> Kurama: Don't you go turning Shukaku on me, kit!!!
> 
> I find it really funny that Naruto thought that Minato was kind of an idiot and it was fun how Naruto's logic works with the Uchiha
> 
> A LATE UPDATE, I'M SORRY. 
> 
> Really, I'm overwhelmed by the reception this fic received. I can't thank you all enough. All the kudos and reading all your helpful and wonderful comments never failed to make me smile. I may not answer some of your questions because I haven't really made up my mind yet and I'm just writing what I felt like I wanted to write... But trust me, I have planned out the ending and some of the story elements of this fic but the details are still lacking and I'm still thinking what I should do about it.
> 
> Concerning the Kyuubi of Naruto and Kushina, yes, there will be two Kurama(s) and Naruto will solve that issue using his logic and analytical skills— which he doesn't have at the moment thank you very much. 
> 
> I'm falling back to my old One Piece and SnK fandom, after my two years of absence and gah!!! The feels were still there!!! 
> 
> I'm taking a break for the meantime because I'm on a special condition right now. I'm taking meds and who would've thought I'm gonna be the next incarnation of Cruella De Vil? 
> 
> (If I felt like it, I'm going to edit this bitch to the point where it'll make my Literature teacher proud.)
> 
> Always remember to wash your hands, take your vitamins and hydrate! Keep safe, stay healthy and don't forget to smile. 
> 
> THANK YOU ALL!! 
> 
> WOW THIS WAS A LONG ASS NOTE! 
> 
> — Segnor


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Out of all the Sannin, why was it that it was Orochimaru that decided to stay?

Contrary to popular belief, Orochimaru was a man of patience. Sarutobi-sensei once told him that he does not have Jiraiya's bullheadedness nor Tsunade's dislike of waiting, but he believed that Orochimaru possessed patience like it's the most deadliest weapon he can ever wield— that and his mind. Because Orochimaru ingrained to his mind when he was but a child that impatience makes a person think that they are not strong enough to endure the difficulties and challenges necessary to accomplish what they think should be accomplished.

He swore to be a strong shinobi, he swore that he would prove everyone wrong, and if he was to be an impatient man, then all his plans would turn into dust.

So, that's why he harnessed patience like a weapon. He carried patience just like a snake watching its prey and waiting for the right time to strike.

But even though he's a man of patience, his eyebrows knitted as he entered the Senju's main house and was welcomed by no one. He had been knocking and waiting for Tsunade to atleast open her doors to him for the past fifteen minutes when he finally decided to barged inside the Slug Princess' house.

Being the last remaining main family member of the Senju Clan, Tsunade lived alone at the main house of the compound. Despite being the Clan Head, Tsunade chose to live alone and acquire no helpers or assistants in her family to help her manage the house and the Clan itself. Tsunade learned how to do menial tasks such as cooking and doing the laundry when it's an unthinkable thing for a Clan Head to do for herself.

Orochimaru was troubled when he roamed the entirety of the huge traditional house and found no one. The place was barren, it's as if no one has been living there for the past week or so and a thin sheen of dusts blanket the furnitures. It was disconcerting. Even when she turned into a drunkard, she would always be the medic that always kept her place pristine clean. ( _"Orochimaru, why can't you keep your laboratory clean?! This place will give you the worst sort infection and respiratory diseases! Keep your damn laboratory clean! Or so help me, I will pummel you to the ground—"_ )

Orochimaru vanished in a Shunshin and arrived in front of the Hokage, disregarding his hardwired manner for the sudden realization in his mind. 

"She left," the Snake Sannin stated, voice flat and not questioning— already sure of the answer. 

The Third Hokage took a deep sigh and turned down his pipe in his table, "she took Dan's niece with him." 

"For how long has she been gone?" 

"A day before you returned to your mission." 

"Have you sent someone after her?" Orochimaru asked. 

"Jiraiya already failed to convince her to come back," the Sandaime said and Orochimaru watched as how his sensei looked old at the thought of his student. 

Orochimaru felt sinking dread in his stomach as his mind started to unravel a puzzle he once discarded as unimportant. He knew in himself that this would happen, Jiraiya already did it and he was just waiting for Tsunade to also do the same. Jiraiya came back, yes, he did come back but he wasn't the same anymore. He did come back to the village but it was as if _he didn't_ , he always took up mission that would last him a longer time out of the village, building his network and spending his time wandering outside the village. Because even though Jiraiya wanted to completely leave the village (for his three orphaned students? For his beliefs? Orochimaru wasn't sure what his reasons were) something was still _anchoring_ him to come back to Konoha. (Was it his loyalty to Konohagakure? His dream of being the Hokage? Orochimaru also wasn't sure but he knew that Jiraiya still has his reasons for staying.) 

But in Tsunade's case, Orochimaru knew in himself that she won't come back, not when she took Dan's niece with her— the only reason she tried to prolong her stay at the village.

Orochimaru understood Tsunade... She wasn't used to the feeling of true _loss_. Unlike Orochimaru and Jiraiya who used to have nothing at all, she used to have everything. She had her family, she had her brother, she had her lover and she had her reason to stay and now that those factors were slowly plucked out of her hands, there's nothing to hold her back anymore... Not even her dedication as a medic nin because Orochimaru watched as Tsunade grown to fear the sight of blood, a condition no medic nin should have.

Orochimaru wanted to get her back. He deeply wanted to. But he believed that he knew nothing of what to say to her to make her change her mind not when he's unsure of his feelings.

Was he angry at what she did? Throwing her bonds with him and her teammates and thinking that it wasn't enough reason for her loyalty.

Was he disappointed? Disappointed that another teammate left him, not even trying to consider that they were the only people Orochimaru have?

Was he... Hurt?

Hurt, _again_?

It was _confusing_. 

Orochimaru wasn't good at feelings. That's why he always sought Jiraiya and Tsunade's counsel because they tried to explain to him what he cannot understand for himself. And now that—

"Orochimaru."

He was broken out of his musings when Sarutobi-sensei called out his name. He looked up to the Sandaime's face.

"Had it ever occurred to your mind to leave the village?"

"Never," he answered truthfully.

The Hokage stared at him, seeking something he doesn't know, "how come?"

Orochimaru stayed quiet, thinking of why he never wanted to leave the village. 

When he was a child, he promised that he would be a strong shinobi. He wanted everyone to acknowledge him. He wanted to prove all those cold eyes that he wasn't the monster they thought of him. Orochimaru was scorned for being different and he wanted to change that. So, he ignored all the looks he received, all the whispers he heard, all the thoughts that he knew was running through the villager's minds and silently promised himself that he will be someone they would acknowledge and never once did it passed through his mind to leave the village that despite his services to it and its people, still continued to treat him as something they can't accept. Because why should he leave when he still hasn't completed his childish promise to himself?

It's unthinkable. Orochimaru may be indifferent but he valued promises and breaking them was an unthinkable act.

His promise was his anchor to his village. 

A sudden thought of a sunshine-haired child entered his mind and he small smile formed in his lips. 

Naruto would leave him— he was sure of that. In the first place, he never really should have been with Orochimaru. But now that he experienced what it felt basking in his warm presence (and the warm feeling he still haven't solve what it was), he had a feeling that those things would stay with him. He wouldn't lose him because thoughts of the blond Uzumaki would always be with him and he would remember it not with grief but with happiness and warmth. 

Two reasons now anchored him in the village. 

_His promise and the strange Uzumaki child._

"I've grown to have something," Orochimaru answered simply, summarizing what he could never turn into words.

* * *

"I made dinner!" the blond Uzumaki excitedly exclaimed when Orochimaru entered the house and was walking towards the kitchen, planning to prepare a meal for them but the Uzumaki beat him to it. 

He gestured for Orochimaru to sit down in his usual chair and he presented their meal with an excited waving of hands. 

"It's cup ramen!" The blue-eyed child almost squealed with deliight, proud of what he did.

"It looks delicious," the Snake Sannin commented.

"It tastes delicious too, 'ttebayo!" The child nodded and sat down next to Orochimaru.

They both said their 'itadakimasu' and Orochimaru watched as the child devoured his favorite meal. The Uzumaki must have noticed that he wasn't touching his food when he looked up to him with question in his eyes.

"Is something wrong?" He inquired.

The Sannin stared at the peculiar child and he reached his hand forwards to touch the child's hair. He saw how the child beamed at his actions, slightly shuffling towards him.

"Thank you," Orochimaru softly said as he patted the child that almost rivals the sun's brightness.

And it was a gratitude not only for the meal but for what the child brought him. He believed that if the blond Uzumaki wasn't with him this day, he'd do something he would probably regret because of the thoughts that ran through his mind at Tsunade's absence. Uzumaki Naruto not only made him realize that he still have someone even though Tsunade left him but he also strengthened his resolved— _his promise._

This strange child was phenomenal. 

He became one of Orochimaru's anchor.

Orochimaru was a patient man, but looking at the whiskered Uzumaki that barged into his life, he couldn''t wait for what lies in the future for this bright child.

"Ne, ne," the child said, looking up at him with curious eyes, "where did you go, dattebayo?"

"I went to look for my teammate, Tsunade, she's a medic nin," Orochimaru explained and he let the child go to start eating his ramen.

He saw the Uzumaki's eyes widen and he asked in a whisper, "are you sick?"

Orochimaru nodded solemnly, "I'm very sick."

"ARE YOU DYING?!" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I already had a pre-written draft for this chapter but it was somehow deleted and from the massive writer's block that I still have, this is painful to write!!! I'm sorry for the late update but I'm having lots of issues that I'm trying my hardest to solve and my meds made me sleep all the time. So, I didn't have the inspiration and time to write and updates will be very irregular, I'm very, very sorry. 
> 
> I suddenly found myself unable to reply to all your comments, I do get emails but the reply url goes nowhere— is this happening to anyone else or am I the only one who's experiencing this? I don't know if something's wrong with my e-mail but just like what I've said earlier, I'm a tech noob, so I'm confused as to what's happening. I'M REALLY SORRY FOR NOT REPLYING TT_TT
> 
> I'm totally overwhelmed at how you all liked the last chapter!! I loved it too! Thank you for the kudos and the comments that pushed me to continue and write this! Thank you all for appreciating this fic! MWAH! 
> 
> As a compensation, I'll update this some time this week for the next chapter! And get ready because Kushina's entering the fray! 
> 
> I love you all! ◥(ฅº￦ºฅ)◤ 
> 
> Let's be the assassins of this virus! Keep ourselves clean, drink our vitamins, eat a balance food, keep ourselves safe and always stay healthy! 
> 
> — Segnor


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tales of the panicking Jinchuriki.

Naruto squinted his eyes and tried to read what was written in the book. _Hypetor_... _Hypertor_... _Hypertror_... And the book went SLAM!

The Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi no Kitsune held his head in his hands and groaned as reading medical terms made his brain overheat. How could Tsunade-baa-chan and Sakura-chan understand these terms? Let alone read it and pronounce it?! What were they eating to make their brains not overheat at these words?!

**'You're just an idiot,'** Kurama lightly commented. 

_'Oi! I take offense to that, 'ttebayo!'_ Naruto grumbled and crossed his arms. 

**'I already told you that the Snake isn't sick. Kit, he didn't smell sick and he even told you that you shouldn't worry about it because he's not dying.'**

_'But he's always holding his chest when he thought that I'm not looking at him! Isn't that a sign for a heart condition? What if he has this Hypetor... Hypetror... Hyper-thingy?! That means, he's **dying** , Kurama!'_

**'You are panicking and overreacting,'** grumbled the grumpy Kyuubi.

_'Am not, 'ttebayo!'_ grumbled back the grumpy Jinchuriki.

It has been three days since Orochimaru told Naruto that he was sick. Being the Jinchuriki of the oversized cranky furball, he haven't had the experience of being sick, so he didn't really know how sick people felt. Kurama explained that his chakra made Naruto's body invulnerable to common sickness, he also told the blond that normal old people experiences chest pain sometimes. But Orochimaru wasn't old! ( _"You'll never know, kit. You'll never know."_ Kurama told him, remembering how the Sannin never looked old whenever they encountered him.)

And Orochimaru also assured him that he's not dying. 

( _"Little fox, you don't have to worry. I'm fine. I'm sure I'm not dying,"_ Orochimaru tried to dispel his panicking but it just made Naruto look at him with wider eyes. _"Whatever illness I have, it's not communicable nor terminal."_

... 

Is he supposed to calm down at that?!)

Naruto made it his mission to observe the Sannin and just like what he told Kurama earlier, Orochimaru always have this weird look in his face as if he's pained and he'd place his hand on his chest. Naruto's not a medic nin but he's absolutely sure that Orochimaru has a heart condition!

So, here he was now, at the Konoha's library and archives, gathering all the medical book he saw and trying to understand all the medical term he encountered. So far, he hasn't understood a lick of what this book says and just like with Fuuinjutsu scrolls, these words were turning gibberish and squiggles in his eyes!

Come on, brain, function!

**'Why don't you just go play with the Hatake-brat? You're wasting your time here,'** Kurama suggested, pitying the overheating brain of his Jinchuriki. 

An idea formed in his mind and he visibly perked up with excitement, _'you're a genius, Kurama! Maybe Sakumo-shiro can help me!'_

**'That's not what I— you know what? You do your thing and wake me up, if you've caused a fire.'**

"Why would I—," 

* * *

"Sakumo-shiro! Sakumo-shiro!" Naruto yelled as he continued banging the door to the Hatake's house.

As his fist hit the door for the fifth time, it opened and he saw a fully prepared Sakumo-shiro. He was wearing his Jounin vest, hitai-ate was tied at his forehead, tanto strapped tightly at his back and a serious look on his face.

... Was he going to a mission?

"Did you start a fire?" The White Fang of Konoha seriously asked as he surveyed Orochimaru's ward's disheveled look.

"No, dattebayo! Why do everyone assume that..." Naruto trailed off and he gave the white-haired man a confused look, "are you going to a mission?"

"... No, I am not going to a—" he was interrupted by Kakashi suddenly appearing at his side and also looking at Naruto.

"Where's the fire?" Tiny-sensei butted in, also looking like his father, as if they were both going to a mission— to the frontlines of the battlefield, to be exact, facing Uchiha Madara in his full undead glory and his non-existent army. 

(No man stands alone against an army in a war. _That is unless, you're Uchiha fucking Madara._ Century-old batshit craziness and laughing at Death's face with a saluting middle finger.) 

"... There's no fire," Hatake Sakumo stated and Naruto heard the surprise, confusion and wonder in his voice.

"Oh." Kakashi said with grim realization. 

Silence drew a line. 

A cricket was heard, chirping at his post in the tree.

Three crows passed in the sky, their crowing sounded suspiciously like _'Aho! Aho! Aho!'_ that added flavor to the idiocy of the situation.

If silence has a sound, they could hear it laughing at them. 

"There's no fire," tiny-sensei broke the silence with a pointed look to his father, the latter looking sheepish, and taking a deserved deep sigh, "that's good. So, why are you trying to destroy our front door?"

"Orochimaru's dying." Naruto declared.

"WHAT?!"

Naruto nodded, ignoring the flabbergasted look he received from the father and son duo as he explained his _scientific founding._

"Three days ago, he went out of the house. I waited for him and decided to cook cup ramen—"

"That's not exactly cooking," tiny-sensei quietly said and Naruto ignored him.

"— just to surprise him because I'm awesome like that, 'ttebayo. And when he got back to the house, I asked him why he went out and he told me that he went looking for his teammate, Tsunade-baa-chan—"

"Baa-chan?" Sakumo whispered with wide eyes— also, _ignored_.

"— she's a medic, 'ttebayo, and I heard that she was one of the best, if not, _the_ best! When I asked him if he was sick— because why would someone look for a medic? They look for a medic because they're sick, right?!— and he told me that he was _very_ sick, dattebayo! I asked him if he was dying because _very sick_ people die, right?! _Right?!_ And he told me that no, he wasn't dying! His sickness was not _commuca_... _Communin_... _Commu_..."

(Was he seriously developing a speech impairment _now?!_ ) 

Naruto looked up to Sakumo with wide pleading eyes and the Hatake decided to help him. 

"Communicable."

"Right," the Uzumaki nodded, "and it's not terminal, 'ttebayo. Of course I didn't believe him because sick people will always deny that they're sick— it's simple sick people logic that I heard once. He was always looking pained and he's also holding his chest as if it's the one causing him harm! I went to the library to read what his sickness was and I found this Hyper-thingy where it causes chest pain and it's life threatening! Sakumo-shiro, _he's dying_! What should I do, dattebayo?!" Naruto exclaimed and he can feel tears forming in his eyes.

Sakumo kneeled down and did his best reassuring smile as he understood what the blond Uzumaki told him, "he's not dying, Naruto. Don't worry."

"He's not?" Naruto asked and he rubbed his eyes with his chibi fists.

Sakumo nodded, " _Hypertrophic cardiomyopathy_ isn't really life threatening. The life expectancy is normal. Out of ten people, seven survives with that condition and if they did die, it didn't have anything to do with the disease," he explained, remembering how he used to scan medical scrolls at his youth in time of deep boredom, knowing that the knowledge will help him in the future.

"What happened to the remaining three people out of ten?" Naruto asked.

"They didn't survive," he lightly stated, not noticing the growing panic in the boy's expression, forgetting the fact that normal children don't really react to death with a knowing expression like Kakashi's. 

(Where did the famous intellect of the White Fang went? Hmm? _Hmm?!_ ) 

( _'Aho! Aho! Aho!'_ There went the three crows.) 

Naruto took a step back and looked horrified, "he's dying! Oh, Kami, he's dying!"

And the blond Uzumaki went running, it's as if a Bijuu was hot on his tails. 

* * *

"Dad," Kakashi said.

"... Yes?"

"Sometimes you're like Minato-sensei," The six-year-old Hatake said— the only one who's sane in the entirety of the shinobi population of the village... _A six-year-old boy._

"An idiot," he added and went to look for his irritating _acquaintance_ , hiding his worry for the annoying sunshine. 

* * *

"Jiji!" Naruto yelled as he opened the Hokage's door with a bang.

Voices suddenly went down at his entrance and Naruto ignored them, running towards his Hokage-jiji and jumping in his lap to hug him.

( _Hey_ , don't judge him. He already tried controlling his childish urges but he failed _spectacularly_ , so now, he just went with what these urges told him to do. And if his urges told him to find the person who can give him comfort and hug him to death, Naruto would follow it dutifully.)

"What happened?" The Sandaime Hokage asked with a patient voice, clearly seeing the distress of his student's ward.

Naruto grumbled and he tightened his hold at the younger than normal Hokage-jiji.

"Did he just..." 

"... Jiji?!" 

"When did you get another grandchild, Hokage-sama?!" An excited voice asked and Naruto swore that he'd heard it before. He looked up and he was greeted with three people standing in front of the Hokage.

A man who looked like the younger version of Hinata's father, a lady who looked like the female version of Uchiha Itachi and a red-haired woman that definitely looked like his Kaa-chan but just like his Tou-chan, she's in her late teens.

He opened his mouth to speak to her but closed it when he thought that he looked like a gaping tuna. 

(It's his Kaa-chan! And she's looking at him! She's alive!)

"Hiashi, Mikoto and Kushina, this is Uzumaki Naruto," the Sandaime introduced him to his three shinobi, "he has been staying at Konoha for the past two weeks with Orochimaru. My student found him at the Land of Fire's borders and he claimed to be an Uzumaki. We were waiting for you to come back to your mission and if you'd agree, he'll stay with you."

Three pair of eyes widened at the Hokage's statement and Uzumaki Kushina took a step forward to him.

"I thought I was the only one..." his Kaa-chan said with a surprised expression on her pretty face and after a second, she smiled at him and offered her hand, "I'm Uzumaki Kushina, dattebane!"

The blond Uzumaki got down from the Hokage's lap and he approached his breathing and living Kaa-chan with excitement.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo!" He exclaimed and took the offered hand with glee.

_Alone._

_Ange ~~r~~._

_Sadness._

_Ang ~~er~~. _

_Worry._

_An ~~ger~~. _

_Despair._

_A ~~nger~~_

_Guilt._

_~~Anger~~._

_Pain._

_~~Angerangerangerangeranger~~. _

As Naruto took his mother's hand, he was overwhelmed with deep emotion. Century-old deep seething anger that he haven't felt for a very long time stirred up his senses and the Kyuubi sleeping in his stomach woke up with a resonating roar.

As he looked at Uzumaki Kushina's horrified violet eyes, oblivion enveloped the whiskered Jinchuriki. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I searched the meaning of 'dattebane' and 'dattebayo' and I've found out that it really has no meaning at all and it's just a tic to fill in the last of the sentence. I guess English dubbers and translators just used 'believe it' as an English replacement. It's one of the reasons why I used 'dattebayo' instead of 'believe it'. Kishimoto-sensei do love his verbal tics. 
> 
> I don't know who Kushina's teammates were but I once read a fic where it's Mikoto and Hiashi, I found it really funny so, credits to that lovely author. 
> 
> Just like what I've promised, I updated this week! HA! I'm in my jam! Boo yah! I deeply enjoyed writing this chapter! It's just me trolling and poor Naruto's my victim! I'm sorry, my child, but I truly am Cruela!! 
> 
> MWAHAHAHAHA. That chapter ending! I'm so evil!! (¬‿¬)
> 
> Thank you, thank you, thank you for all the kudos and comments! Y'all making me swoon like a Californian lady!
> 
> Always stay safe! 
> 
> — Segnor


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto's big fluffy ball of chakra.

When Naruto first met Kurama, he was bombarded with hundreds of emotions.

He was falling from a steep cliff because Ero-sennin thought that it was brilliant way to contact the Kyuubi's chakra inside of him after failing so many times on acquiring a decent summons with the toads. It wasn't a brilliant idea because of three different reasons. First, if he didn't manage to _borrow_ the Kyuubi's powers, he'll die from the height he fell from. Second, _holyshithemettheKyuubi_. Third, he almost freaking died!

So, yeah, when he first met the Kyuubi, he wasn't exactly sure what to feel. 

Behind the tall and thick metal bars was the legendary Kyuubi no Youko, a creature of chakra sealed inside him when he was born and the reason why he was treated like an outcast growing up.

He was the reason why the people managing the orphanage never bothered to take care of him and warned the other orphans to never go near him.

He was the reason why the instructors at the Academy ignored him and didn't bother to teach him how to write nor read.

He was the reason why the vendors increased the prices of their products whenever they saw him trying to buy something.

He was the reason why everyone treated him like _shit_.

Naruto felt anger at the sight of the Kyuubi that it never even registered in his mind that he needed his chakra to be able to save himself. He was so, so angry at the creature that when the Kyuubi gazed at him, he felt rooted at his spot.

It was hate. Naruto hated the Kyuubi. 

But when the feeling of hate started to boil down in his system after the staring match the two of them did, Naruto realized that he felt the Kyuubi's hate. Not just towards him but at everything. He can feel how suffocating it was standing in front of the creature even behind bars because of the deep-rooted hate that the Kyuubi had.

And when he started asking rent from the Kyuubi, he was slightly thankful to get out of that place even if that was technically inside his mind. 

He feared that if he stayed any longer, the Kyuubi would influence him to act out Naruto's hidden hate at the village. It's true that he loved his village and he would always be a loyal shinobi of Konoha but after suffering the village's treatment for their resident Jinchuriki, deep inside him, there's a small part that hated the village for what they did to him as a child.

He never knew why they treated him that way and when he found out the reason, he was beyond frustrated that they didn't saw that Naruto wasn't the demon sealed inside of him. 

After that first meeting, the second followed and the third and many more until his battle with Pein when he met his Tou-chan. Naruto believed that Namikaze Minato deserved the punch he threw at him. Sure, it was cool meeting the Yondaime Hokage— his childhood hero— but knowing that he was Naruto's dad and the man that sealed the Kyuubi in him, he really felt that he deserved more than Naruto's punch. But knowing that his father trusted Naruto to be the one to stop the cycle of hate and control the Kyuubi, Naruto's resolve grew and the Kyuubi's previous words of negative persuasion was immediately placed at the back of his mind.

His Tou-chan trusted him and he would prove the man that he was right on doing so.

He stopped rampaging and the Naruto's transformation to the Kyuubi's real form stopped with how his will grew inside him.

And during the start of the Fourth Shinobi War when Killer B was tasked on helping Naruto to control his Bijuu, he again saw the Kyuubi. He told Naruto that he shouldn't shoulder the weight of the entire war on his shoulder because no matter what he did, his efforts will be all for a naught. It was futile. But with how confident Naruto was at his own resolve and the will of the people like Jiraiya, Minato and Nagato that left him their beliefs and wishes, he was sure that he can carry the fox' hate and help him solve it.

He was so, so thankful that the Kyuubi decided to put his trust on Naruto and bestowed him his name.

_Kurama_.

It was the sign of their promise. Kurama's name reminded Naruto that he would always carry his hate and help him.

Now, after everything that both Jinchuriki and Bijuu experienced with each other, Naruto seeing the past Kurama filled with deep seething rage, Naruto could not help but feel tears running through his cheeks. 

" _I'm sorry_ ," the blond Jinchuriki all but wailed as he saw the state of how Kurama was treated by his past jailer.

The magnificent Kyuubi no Youko was lying his back on a half-moon rock, chains tied around his humongous body and large wooden stakes stabbed his nine tails, hands and feet, keeping him in his lying position.

It was horrifying seeing the Bijuu in that position.

He thought that Kurama wasn't just sealed but he was almost tortured by how he was kept in that rock. It was unthinkable that someone put him in that place. Of course he knew that at this time that Kurama wasn't how he was now with Naruto, he wasn't forgiving. And Naruto also knew that the reason why Kurama felt that way before was justifiable at how the humans of the past treated him and his siblings.

"How did you get here?!" The Kyuubi roared at him, red slitted eyes glaring at the human that trespassed in his jail.

"I'm sorry," Naruto repeated and his crying just got worse as he imagined how Kurama must have been feeling right now, " ~~ _i'msorryi'msorryi'msorry_~~ —"

Naruto ignored the danger of approaching the Kyuubi when he ran towards the creature of chakra and burrowed himself at the first tail that he got to hold on to.

No matter what time, Kurama would always be Kurama. And nobody could ever change his mind on that fact.

(Even Kurama himself.)

* * *

Sarutobi Hiruzen heaved a deep sigh as he let his hand knock on the wooden door of one of the hospital's private room. He never heard anything aside from the steady beeping of the heart monitor as he let himself inside the room. His gaze immediately fell on the straight back of his student sitting on the chair beside the bed of his recent charge.

Hiruzen's eyes roamed the resting form of the blond Uzumaki and was disappointed to see that there was no sign of waking up.

He approaced his student and sat at the empty seat beside the Sannin. The Sandaime Hokage let the silence settle for a few minutes, student and teacher observing the child that wasn't suited to be in such a position.

"He's thin," the lulling voice of his student broke the silence and Hiruzen looked up to see that Orochimaru's eyes were still settled at his ward. "I always managed to cook for him and never missed a meal but he's still too thin. I guess I might need to make diet plans for him to improve his body."

Hiruzen absorbed his student's words as he saw how different he had become at the influence of the bright child. Orochimaru had changed— no... He was always supposed to be this way. Naruto brought out this side of Orochimaru that once in a while managed to make an appearance whenever he was filled with the presence of his teammates.

Everyone saw Orochimaru as a cold and calculating man. Yes, he was those things but he was _so much more_.

When Hiruzen first glanced at his student, he always knew in himself that he was capable of such deep emotions. Orochimaru just decided to build a wall around those emotions to protect himself and Hiruzen couldn't fault him for that. Even when he felt afraid that Orochimaru would change into someone the he would regret after his teammates left him on his own.

Orochimaru wasn't supposed to be left alone because he thrived at others' company even when he never outwardly showed it.

And now. Now that he was showing such emotions, Hiruzen was afraid of what would happen if Orochimaru's reason for the cracks in his walls would suddenly disappear from his life.

"He's a Jinchuriki," the Sandaime Hokage said with grief in his voice, already visualizing what the child must have suffered to be as such, "Kushina didn't know what the Bijuu inside of him is but Jiraiya just came back to the village and the two of them, including Minato, were studying how Naruto's seals work and see what he's keeping."

"It's been days," Orochimaru stated.

"They're working on it, you just need to put your trust in them. Kushina tried talking to the Kyuubi on what caused Naruto to collapsed but she was rejected rather violently. She didn't know if meeting another Jinchuriki had caused that reaction but he had never met one before so she's not sure of that theory."

The steady beeping of Naruto's heart made the seasoned shinobi relaxed to the rhythm as they again let the silence enveloped them.

"He's a good kid," Hiruzen said, remembering how bright and happy the child was, "one of these days he'll be back to his bouncing self and smiling glory as if nothing ever fazes him."

Hiruzen saw a tiny tilt in his student's lips, "nothing ever fazes him."

Hiruzen remembereded something and chuckled to himself, "Sakumo said that Naruto told him that you're suffering from a heart condition?" 

"I am," Orochimaru agreed.

"Does it hurt when Naruto's around?" Hiruzen asked, smile playing on his lips. 

"It does," Orochimaru nodded with seriousness. 

* * *

Kushina took a step back as she finished hearing Orochimaru-sama's words. She didn't mean to eavesdrop at their conversation ( _Hiashi, no, she's not an eavesdropper_ ) but she couldn't help herself.

She was curious at the Snake Sannin's relationship with the younger and whiskered (his whiskers were so cute!) Uzumaki when Minato told him that Naruto has been staying with Orochimaru for days. And now that he heard Hokage-sama and Orochimaru-sama's conversation, Kushina imagined that Orochimaru-sama and Naruto must have made quite an interesting pair.

Kushina went on her way towards where she left Minato and Jiraiya-sama still trying to decipher the ingenious seal and nodded with determination. They must make haste. She needed to see that blinding smile again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A wise man once said: "Hey guys, sorry I'm late, I'm afraid I got lost on the path of life."
> 
> THIS WILL BE DAMN LONG, I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE. 
> 
> Let me just tell you that 2020 has not been my— our— year. I have problems upon problems on my shoulder and I don't even know what to do to solve all of them. My grandma just passed away last month and I'm still grieving because she was the one who raised me and I love her so much. And between that and my medication that still made me so damn sleepy, I was unable to write an update. (I sound like an unreliable writer with all the excuses but I'm really not, I love writing, I really do.)
> 
> I'm kind of torned between Kushina finding the truth about Naruto and her just you know, not noticing a thing wrong about this blond Uzumaki. So, yeah, if I disappointed someone with my decision, blame Uchiha Madara. Secret Shinobi Rule #12: if things went to shit, blame Madara. 
> 
> (Next chapter will come out within this week or the next because I'm feeling so guilty.) 
> 
> I am so grateful for the support like what the fuck when I opened this fic, I found out the 1k plus kudos and I'm so thankful to all of you! Sorry if I was unable to reply to all of the comments but I read all of them and they really inspired me to continue. I really appreciate honest opinions and corrections from my typographical and grammatical error but after going to ff.net and reading some of the comments on some of the fics there, I found out that some people were just plain mean. I really don't tolerate harsh criticism or just plain insult because why would someone say something so harsh about others' work? If you don't like it, why don't you make one for yourself? 
> 
> THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT! DON'T FORGET I LOVE Y'ALL!!
> 
> Eat healthy and don't forget your damn masks when planning to go outside!! 
> 
> — Segnor


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kurama; the tales of the stressed Nine Tails.

Kurama knew that something would go wrong the moment Naruto came face to face with Uzumaki Kushina.

Kurama knew that something would go wrong if the past and the future-present Jinchuriki met.

Kurama was a being that lived for eons and he may not be an expert when it comes to paradoxes and time travel but he knew that shit would turn up just by letting Naruto be Naruto. 

And oh boy, was he right with those assumptions. 

As he felt his consciousness slowly crept up to him, a blinding headache pounded him— a phenomenon that no Bijuu had ever experienced before and quite frankly, an impossible thing to happen considering that he's a creature made of malice and pure chakra; his healing ability was something to wish for. But as he learned since he started accepting his Jinchuriki, nothing's impossible when it comes to Uzumaki Naruto. And as if the Kami read his thoughts, the Kyuubi no Youko heard a _'dattebayo'_ followed by a loud wailing of a small child.

The Kyuubi opened his eyes to look at what the Kami's happening with his Jinchuriki, a deadpanned expression crossed his face as he watched a disgruntled Kyuubi staked on a rock, throwing death threats at the sunshine-haired child clinging to one of his tails and sobbing and mumbling incoherent words.

(Kurama would willingly die first before he let Shukaku hear of this event.)

Watching his past self trying to bat away the persistent pest cluthing his tail— as if his life depended on it— and the sight was enough to tenfold his headache and kill him on the spot.

( _"Here lies the magnanimous Kyuubi no Youko— the strongest of the Bijuu, the most terrifying creature in all the Elemental Nations and the unlucky being to suffer from the torment of the Uzumakis— who met his untimely death from a headache. May you find peace in the Pure Lands."_ He could almost picture the words written on his non-existent grave and wasn't that sweet?)

Kurama was honest enough to admit that he had a sadistic streak somewhere in his bones. But watching his past self suffer at the tiny hands of the pest called Uzumaki Naruto, even he knows how to draw a line somewhere. 

"Okay, kit, that's enough tormenting the poor Bijuu," Kurama said with all the patience he could muster up and plucked the ever-loving ramen idiot with his claws away from the pitiful Bijuu.

Silence dawned at the mindscape as they tried to process his sudden interruption and it was immediately broken down by Naruto's hiccups.

"Kurama!"

And again, there was wailing. 

(Naruto at this age can be a crybaby.)

(In the true words of a Nara; _troublesome_.)

* * *

"Are you calm now?" The being of rage, wrath, fury— and the sudden addition to the nouns that would describe him— patience, said in a voice that he wouldn't never in his thousand years of living, would ever use.

"Uhn, 'ttebayo," Naruto nodded and further burrowed himself at Kurama's fur (as if he's some kind of a security blanket, it's adora—) 

Kurama nodded to himself, if he's using that irritable idiosyncrasy of his, then that means he won't break down to another session of crying anymore. He looked at his past counterpart and saw his incredulous stare directed at the pair of Jinchuriki and Bijuu.

"If you hadn't shown me your memories, I will believe that years of isolation finally made you succumb to madness," past-Kurama commented, pointing out how flabbergasted he was when the present-Kurama hold up a fist to him.

Who knew that Gyuki's Jinchuriki, Killer B could be smart sometimes? His idea of sharing memories with fist bump was stupid but it does work, not only through Jinchuriki to Bijuu but also through Bijuu to Bijuu. 

The fox heard Naruto whined at his past self's comment and he grinned at the sealed Bijuu in front of him.

"Who's to say that there's no madness in me now?" He asked, remembering the trauma from his years of watching Uzumaki Kushina and Naruto's daily intake of ramen. Even the thought alone made him nauseous.

(Those dratted noodles.)

(He won't say it out loud but he thinks that the Snake was having a good influence at his kit with how Naruto started eating properly.)

"We won't leave him here, right?" Naruto suddenly asked from his comfortable position, "we can't leave him here."

Naruto looked up to him and Kurama stared at his blue eyes filled with determination. The Kyuubi knew that when his eyes were like this, no one could stop his stubborn kit.

Kurama sighed and plopped his body to the ground, ignoring Naruto's indignant yell as his tiny body was crushed by his, "that is if he'd agree to you," he said and waved his clawed hand at his past counterpart.

Naruto then stared at the chained Kyuubi and just like what Kurama expected, his past self relented. The blond Uzumaki's eyes were a _lethal_ weapon. Naruto could use his eyes and ask for the world to burn and the world would burn itself. Kurama always wondered how the people of the Konoha from Naruto's childhood could look at those eyes and continue to treat him as if he's the worse scum of this _pretentious_ world. True, he was the container of the Kyuubi. True, those people were imbeciles. If Naruto didn't make him promise to never harm nor eat those morons who once hurt him, Konoha's population would be reduced to more or less than ten people.

Naruto was an innocent and bright child— _still is_.

(And now, he's not the only one who knows that.) 

"What should we do?" Past-Kurama grumbled, acting like agreeing to Naruto personally offended him.

Kurama gave a smirk to his past self and Naruto excitedly cheered.

(His kit's adorabl—) 

Kurama shook his head, erasing unnecessary thoughts. 

* * *

Orochimaru narrowed his eyes at the grinning fool in front of him. 

"Come on, Oro-teme! Don't look as if you don't want to see the great Jiraiya-sama!" The fool, or as he would like to call himself 'Jiraiya', did a squat, pointed his left hand at the heaven and place his right in front of him.

"I don't," the Snake Sannin answered in a flat voice.

"Aww, come on, Oro! Don't tell me you're still angry with that cup of ramen! It's your fault in the first place!" Jiraiya whined and plopped on the seat next to Orochimaru in an ungraceful heap. The Snake Sannin raised a questioning brow, silently asking what the fool meant. "Oh no, don't raise your eyebrows at me like that, it is _your_ fault. For someone so smart, you're petty."

"How come I'm the petty one when you've pulled a prank on me on my last mission by sabotaging my food supplies?"

"Please don't use the word _sabotage_ , that's an exaggeration!"

Orochimaru didn't deem the man an answer and put his attention back to the scrolls he was reading before the white-haired man unceremoniously interrupted him. He heard Jiraiya grumbling at his side, muttering complaints.

"... You won't retaliate, right?" Finally, Jiraiya asked the question that was stewing on his mind since he realized the shit that he's done.

Jiraya admitted that he was petty by pranking his fellow nin because Orochimaru snitched him to Tsunade months before and knowing Orochimaru, he hated the cup ramen Jiraiya enjoys. So, as a retaliation for the beatings he received from Tsunade, he exchanged all his food rations to instant ramen. It's a great prank and he wondered if Orochimaru even ate one of those— but because he's a stubborn bastard, the Snake Sannin would suffer from hunger than eating what Jiraiya packed for him.

Thinking about it now, he felt guilty for making Orochimaru suffer but also— he felt so much afraid for his damn life! If Jiraiya's a petty son of a bitch, Orochimaru's a vindictive bastard! Just imagining what the Snake Sannin would do as a retaliation for that prank was enough to make him start digging for a hole to bury what would remain of his body.

(And Tsunade's not here to save him from the Snake Sannin!)

"That would be very childish of me," Orochimaru answered, not bothering to look up from his scrolls, "of course I wont."

Orochimaru heard Jiraiya's exhale of relief and he asked in a hopeful voice, "you won't?"

The Snake Sannin lifted his eyes and stared at the man's black orbs, "I will."

A smirk lifted his mouth when he heard Jiraiya's scream of horror. 

"You liar!" He accused and stood up from his seat— almost springing actually, "you can't do that! You can't, Oro!"

"And why not?" Orochimaru slowly tilted his head.

"Be... Because..." Jiraiya sputtered, thinking of an excuse and when his eyes landed at the child lying on the hospital bed, he immediately came up with something, "because I'm saving your son's life by trying to figure out what the hell happened to him! That's why!"

Silence. 

Orochimaru stared with unblinking eyes at his teammate, asking himself if he heard the fool right. 

Did he just say... 

Son?

Did Jiraiya—

And before Orochimaru could open his mouth to ask what Jiraiya meant, the latter scoffed and crossed his arms. 

"See, I have a point, did I? I'm... I'm going, I have some research to do." And the man bolted out of the hospital room like the Kyuubi no Youko was personally chasing him. The hospital room's door rattled at how forceful the Toad Sannin closed the door. 

Orochimaru blinked. And blinked again.

( _How many braincells did Jiraya even have?)_

And as Orochimaru tried to calculate Jiraiya's remaining brain cells, he heard a small groan and he instantly bolted out of his seat to look at his wayward charge. The Snake Sannin watched as the blond Uzumaki's eyes slowly opened. He stared worryingly at the crystal blue eyes and felt his worries vanished as the child looked up to him and gave him a smile.

(How he missed seeing that.)

Orochimaru sat down next to the empty space of the whiskered child's bed and his hands automatically went to the blond hair, smoothing out the tangles. His heart made a painful clench as he felt the child leaning to his touch.

"Good morning," Orochimaru softly said— smiling, "little fox."

The Uzumaki launched himself at the Sannin and the latter caught him, bringing him close to his chest. The child burrowed his head at the crook of his neck and Orochimaru continued petting him in his blond hair. 

"Good morning," his little fox mumbled, "I'm sorry for waking up late, _Orochi-tou_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since they were at Naruto's mindscape, there weren't any italicized and bold words to identify who's talking. 
> 
> I got lost on the road of life called college, so I haven't had the time to write an update. Sadly to say, I wasn't accepted on my chosen course nor school because I was applying for a scholarship and it just turned out that the school had a limit for scholar students, so my parents told me that I should stop for the sem and just enroll for the next. But I'm totally fine with it, I'm not rushing life— just riding its wave now. 
> 
> I intended this chapter to be light, so I'm so sorry if some of you were expecting it to be angsty. 
> 
> I may or may not be drunk while writing this. 
> 
> THANK Y'ALL FOR ALL THE KUDOS AND COMMENTS! LOVE Y'ALL!
> 
> — Segnor


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which subtlety has never been on Naruto's vocabulary.

"Are you certain that you can do this?"

Naruto looked up at Orochimaru as they both stopped in front of the Hokage's office.

"Uhn!" Naruto nodded and enthusiastically swayed his hand that was held by the Sannin. Orochimaru stared at him for a second, as if confirming that he was alright and he could do this. When the Snake Sannin gave Naruto one of his soft smile, a decision he made days before strengthened.

"Alright," the pale man agreed and knocked at the door before the two of them entered.

A smile formed on Naruto's lips as he saw his Kaa-chan and Ero-sennin sitting in front of Hokage-jiji. The three shinobi halted their discussion when they entered the office and without further invitation, Orochimaru joined them and he lifted Naruto to help him sit beside him. There was silence as the three people inside the room watched Naruto and Orochimaru and the Sandaime broke it as he greeted Naruto.

"How are you feeling, Naruto?" The brown-haired man asked and took a puff of his smoke.

Naruto smiled at the older man, "I feel great, dattebayo!"

The Hokage nodded at his answer and done with the small talk, he leaned back in his chair as he regarded Naruto with a small amount of scrutiny, "three days ago, when you met Kushina and suddenly fell unconscious, we found something. I don't know if you know this but you're—"

"A Jinchuriki and a Bijuu's sealed inside of me?" Naruto asked, already knowing what he's about to say and feeling giddy at something he's going to ask later on, "I know, 'ttebayo."

They fell silent at his answer so Naruto took it as a chance to explain, just like what Kurama once said: _patience has never been his virtue._

"My Kaa-chan and Tou-chan died when they sealed a Bijuu inside me when I was a new born baby. My Jiji took care of me after that but he died when a missing nin attacked my village," he explained, remembering what he told Orochimaru as an excuse when he asked where he was from.

"But why didn't you tell us that you're a Jinchuriki?" The Hokage asked, needing to know if he's planning something at hiding his Jinchuriki status.

"Well... When people find out that I'm a Jinchuriki, things turn _bad_ ," Naruto said, partly an excuse and partly the truth.

He was hated by the whole village by simply being the Jinchuriki, knowing that he didn't even do those things that they were accusing him of. He didn't know if being a Jinchuriki at the Konoha of this time would be a bad thing for him because he didn't know if he'd be accepted by them. Orochimaru was treated as if he's someone to be feared rather than someone to be trusted when at this time, he does nothing but be loyal to the village and to its citizen.

So what would happen if they found out that he has the Kyuubi sealed in his stomach? 

Naruto didn't tell the Hokage about the Bijuu inside of him because he was unsure and he didn't tell Orochimaru even when he immediately trusted him because he was afraid that he'd also treat him differently (and also, he haven't really talked to Kurama if he should tell it to someone). But when he woke up and explained to Orochimaru why he fell unconscious, at first he was really scared to find out what his reactions would be and when Naruto told him the real reason, Orochimaru just patted him in the head and told him how brave he was.

Naruto didn't know what he meant by that but when he understood it, Kurama grumbled in his head how his crying made him feel irritated.

( _"Thank you, thank you, thank you,"_ Naruto repeated as he hugged Orochimaru, afraid that if he let go, none of this would be true.

_"What for?"_ Orochimaru asked, combing his hands through Naruto's hair.

_"... F-for accepting me..."_ )

And when Orochimaru assured him that he wouldn't be different in his eyes, an idea bloomed in Naruto's mind and no one would ever stop him from making it happen. _Not even his Kaa-chan._

"What's the Bijuu inside you?" Ero-sennin asked and when Naruto looked at him, silently asking why he asked that, he clarified by saying: "well, it's just that the seal in your stomach is the _Eight Trigrams Sealing Style_ , your parents must have been sealing geniuses to come up with it. The seal's a masterpiece, really. And it makes you access the chakra of the Bijuu inside of you whenever you wanted it and use it as your own. And the seal can also make you talk to your Bijuu— did you already have a conversation with it?"

Naruto tilted his head and eyed the young looking Ero-sennin sitting next to his Kaa-chan. It was so surreal for him to see Ero-sennin in this look because just like Hokage-jiji, he couldn't imagine them having a childhood at all. They were both figures in Naruto's past that he would look back to with determination as he remembered all the lessons they both taught him when he was just a child. And now that technically, he's in a five-year-old's body with the mind of a seventeen-year-old's, it's really weird seeing them like this. The blond Uzumaki silently wondered if at this age, Ero-sennin was already a pervert but knowing the man— he already is.

"Yes," Naruto confirmed the man's assumptions, "and he's not an _it_ , he's a _he_. His name's Kurama."

Shocked expressions greeted his answer as Uzumaki Kushina tried to hold on her beliefs when it comes to creatures of terror and chakra.

"Wait... Wait— wait! Did you mean a Bijju gave you its— I'm sorry— _his_ name? How could that happen, dattebane!?" The red-haired woman almost exclaimed.

"I talked to him." Naruto shrugged his shoulders, as if anyone could just do it like he did. 

"How many tails does he have?" Hokage-hiji asked after recovering from shock.

"Nine, he's the Kyuubi."

Again, reactions of shock met his answer.

(They're faces were really funny. Naruto should make a habit of doing this.)

"How can that happen? Your eyesight's probably been deteriorating, kid, or you're a liar," Jiraiya said almost childishly for a man of his status. 

Naruto furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at the white-haired man in indignation. Hey! Naruto's not a liar! Sure, he might have been telling them some lies but—

The whiskered child crossed his arms and pouted, "am not, 'ttebayo! Kurama's a giant fox with nine tails and he's the Kyuubi!"

He knew that he should probably tell this fact to them slowly but Jiraiya just called him a liar, so he didn't care what they would think about his next statements. 

"And I know you don't believe what I've said because it's impossible to have two Bijuu's of the same tail count but mine's not. The Kyuubi has two sides, the yin and yang, he told me that his existence was separated into two parts years ago when the first Hokage and Uzumaki Mito tried to seal him! His yin part was sealed into the Shodai's wife but the yang part was left free somewhere.

My Kaa-chan's grandmama stumbled upon Kurama one day but as a Bijuu that was torn into two, he was weak and so he proposed to grandmama to seal him inside of her as he sleep for years, resting and trying to build up the chakra that was stolen from him. So, when Kushina and I held hands, I fell unconscious because the two parts of the Kyuubi suddenly merged into one existence again. No, I'm not a liar!" Naruto exclaimed childishly, not even panting at the long explanation he just told them.

Hokage-jiji, Kaa-chan and Ero-sennin absorbed his words. Naruto looked at his side when Orochimaru once again lifted him and seated him back to his chair. He didn't even notice that he left his chair— too absorbed with his explanations.

"Does... Does that mean the Kyuubi's not sealed inside me anymore?" Kushina asked and placed a hand on her stomach.

Naruto's ears blew a fuse as he remembered Kurama's state when he was sealed inside the red-head's.

"Not anymore and he was happy to leave you anyways," Naruto said in a tone filled with righteous anger, "he's being tortured there! No one should be sealed like that, it's unfair and inhumane! You're... You hurt him so when yang-Kurama asked if he wanted to be one again, yin-Kurama immediately agreed because he didn't want to be staked on a rock again!"

Naruto doesn't understand the emotions that ran inside Kushina but when he saw relief and shame, his righteous anger somewhat depleted. It's not exactly Kushina's fault that Kurama was sealed in that way (still, he was angry that they did it to his friend) because at this time, no one tried to _understand_ Kurama. No one even _sees_ Kurama as simply Kurama beyond his status of being a Bijuu because they were very afraid of him— and his attack on Konoha in the future hadn't even happened yet!

They were afraid of the Kyuubi because they didn't even tried to ask why he was always feeling that way— _always_ angry, raging and furious. No one bothered. Not Mito. Not Kushina. _Just Naruto._ Naruto was the only one who tried understanding Kurama and he still thinks that his anger was very justifiable.

And when he saw relief at Kushina's eyes, he instantly remembered how he felt when he found out that he was a Jinchuriki. Maybe like him, Kushina was also unwilling to be the Jinchuriki but she was left with no choice. Maybe like him before, she also didn't want a Bijuu contained inside her. And with the shame filling her eyes, maybe— maybe she regretted _not bothering to even try_.

"You're the Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi," Hokage-jiji said, summing up everything he just told them, "and Kushina's not."

Naruto nodded, satisfied that they understood his explanations.

(Well, if they didn't, he wouldn't even bother trying to elaborate anymore because he already told them what Kurama told him as an explanation to what the hell happened. Naruto's not good in lying, so he didn't know what to say anymore if he ran out of script. He's just thankful that Kurama already has prepared one for him. And what he told them was not exactly a lie, most of them were truths. The two Kuramas _did_ merge into one but not exactly as how Naruto explained it. Kurama tried to make him understand what he just did with his past self but the talk about paradoxes and time traveling voodoo made him think of ramen because _atleast_ ramen was _interesting._ )

(And if they wouldn't accept his answers, he's a five-year-old, kids his age were dumb. Except maybe Kakashi. Tiny-sensei would always be smart in his eyes no matter his age was.)

"Any more questions?" Naruto asked and placed his eyes at the Hokage. The latter stared back at him but instead of asking more questions, Jiji shook his head.

"I think you made your point well, Naruto," he commented.

Naruto beamed at him and he heard Jiraiya muttered something. 

" _Too bright_ , the kid's too bright," the Toad Sannin muttered and Kushina nodded to it. Naruto didn't say anything because he didn't hear what the man said and continued beaming at the Hokage.

"Now that we're done here, I'm going back to my research—"

"Actually, sensei, can I ask you and Kushina for something?" Orochimaru interrupted Jiraiya's sorry excuse of a research.

Naruto looked at Kushina when Orochimaru called her name. Kushina, not expecting that the Sannin would address her, nodded warily, "what is it, 'ttebane?"

" _Can I adopt Naruto?_ "

Time seemed to stop as Naruto heard those words.

( _"Okay, Kurama, I've made a decision,"_ Naruto said to Kurama after an idea popped in his mind, still feeling blissful that the Snake Sannin accepted him.

**_"What is it, kit?"_ **Kurama grumbled.

_"I'm going to adopt Orochimaru and no one can stop me not even him! I'm going to ask Jiji later! I'm gonna make him be my Tou-san so I could call him Orochi-tou! It's going to be great! I'm so great, dattebayo!"_ He proudly said.

**_"... Isn't it supposed to be the other way around?"_** ) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omake*  
> Kurama: idiotic plan by the idiotic kit... MuSt pR0tEC @ oL cOsT
> 
> After making this chapter, I just found out that I don't understand shit about sealing. I hope y'all understand some of my explanations because even though I tried reading and learning the basics of sealing, I'm really terrible at explaining how it works. Welp, it's a crack fic so... I hope none of y'all take this seriously (I'm really laughing nervously while writing this.)
> 
> (I hope this chapter was atleast acceptable though, because I'm really shitty at explaining and I'm still indecisive concerning the existence of the two Kyuubi's.) 
> 
> (Sorry for the typos and errors, it's really late, I don't have the time to edit this one.) 
> 
> THANK YOU ALL FOR READING, COMMENTING AND LEAVING KUDOS TO THIS FIC! HAVE A GREAT DAY! OR NIGHT! OR MORNING, WHATEVER TIME IT IS IN YOUR TIMEZONE! 
> 
> Stay safe and healthy! 
> 
> — Segnor


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Petition. Mission. Rice cracker dilemma.

Sakumo didn't know whether to feel surprised or worried when he got out of the Sandaime Hokage's office and saw Naruto sitting at the lobby of the Hokage Tower, clutching a scroll in his chest and what he would assume would be a bento box. After staring at the blond child for a whole minute, the White Fang shook his head and instead, he decided to just bottle it up with Naruto being Naruto. He shouldn't feel surprised with how Naruto spent his morning.

"Good morning, Naruto," Sakumo greeted as he padded over to the bright Uzumaki.

"Shiro!" Naruto beamed a brilliant smile at him and Sakumo thought that it could defy the sun's brightness. Was this the kid's jutsu? "What are you doing here?"

"I was summoned by Sandaime-sama," Sakumo answered, already used to Naruto's nickname for him no matter how weird he felt when the child called him that, "what are _you_ doing here?"

"I'm going to give him breakfast and I'm making a petition, 'ttebayo!" The whiskered Uzumaki proudly stated and put the bento he's clutching at the empty seat next to him and he waved a scroll in front of Sakumo.

Sakumo paused for a second. _A petition?_

"I see," _no, he didn't_ , "what are you petitioning for? Can I read it?"

Naruto excitedly handed him the scroll and Sakumo unraveled it. And the scroll stated:

_'Adoption: For All Ages_

_I, Naruto Uzumaki, is proposing a petition to make adoption available for all ages.'_

Sakumo rolled the scroll back and handed it to the excitable child. He had never written a petition before but he was certain that that's not _how_ it was supposed to be written. If he was curious with Naruto's letter, he didn't let it show on his face.

He found his voice after thinking how on Kami's name would Naruto make such a letter and asked when he came up with nothing, "why did you write that?"

"Orochi-tou adopted me first before I got to ask the Hokage-jiji that I wanted to adopt him but they said that it's not possible, dattebayo. Hokage-jiji told me that that's not how adoption works. So, I'm making a petition to let children adopt whoever they want!" The child said, voice full of passion and determination as if he's making a speech for the public.

There was _so much_ to unpack on what Naruto said to him to him but to preserve his sanity, Sakumo decided to focus on the most glaring issue.

"Orochimaru adopted you?"

"Uhn, 'ttebayo!"

The White Fang was surprised that this was how Naruto's stay with Orochimaru ended. Sure, he saw signs of the Snake Sannin's parental instincts towards the blond kid but he never expected that this would happen. Being friends with Jiraiya and how desensitized he was at his _exploits_ and knowing Tsunade's _tendencies_ , you wouldn't expect for the two of them to settle down and have a kid of their own. Tsunade must have plans with Dan but their ending was a tragic one that Sakumo never wanted to think about. Out of the Sannin, Orochimaru was the last one he would thought of having a kid, much less adopting Naruto.

But looking back as his memories of Naruto and Orochimaru's interaction, he must say that they're both good for each other.

(Huh, maybe he should really stopped being surprised when it comes to Naruto. He always surpasses the impossible, after all.)

"Congratulations in having a new father," Sakumo told the kid, "you must have been feeling happy."

Naruto stared at him for a second before he nodded seriously, "I am."

The White Fang smiled at the child and remembered that Naruto was waiting here at the lobby, he's probably waiting for the Hokage to finish his meeting with Sakumo.

"You should send your letter to him now," Sakumo said and sat next to the blond Uzumaki, "if you want I can wait for you here and after you finish your business with Sandaime-sama, you can visit the compound and Kakashi?"

"Okay! Please wait for me here, dattebayo!" The child energetically said and brought the bento and scroll to his chest as he ran towards the Hokage's office.

Sakumo heard a banging of a door and waited for the child. No more than five minutes, Naruto came back running to him and he jumped towards Sakumo. Letting his instincts move for him, the White Fang caught the child and carried him in his arms. 

"Let's go and see Tiny-sensei!" He cheered as if Sakumo's his personal steed and the Jounin had no choice but to follow his orders. He loved seeing that energetic smile after all. 

(The last time Kakashi let Sakumo carry him like this was after Naruto first visited their compound. Kakashi never let Sakumo carried him like how a normal five-year-old would want but after this, he would follow the Uzumaki's footsteps and make a petition for Kakashi on letting him clutch his son at his chest. Sakumo missed carrying his son.)

* * *

Naruto pouted as he stared at Kakashi, "what do you mean you're attending the Academy?"

"That I'm attending the Academy?" Kakashi retorted with his blank voice and if possible Naruto pouted harder, adjusting his purple scarf and crossing his arms at his chest. 

"But you're my age, dattebayo! Why would they let you enter?" He asked.

"Actually, I'm just spending three months in the Academy because I aced the entrance test and all the exam they gave me. The administration can't just let me graduate without spending some time at school, so they want me to atleast have three months with the class," chibi Kakashi said like his achievement was nothing.

(It was probably nothing for him but for Naruto— who repeated a year or two because he didn't manage to pass the graduation test— it was a _big deal_ for him! Damn Kakashi-sensei for his laziness but still managing to be a great shinobi and damn Tiny-sensei for being a genius at this age!)

An idea suddenly popped in his mind and he couldn't stop the grin forming in his lips as he nodded.

_'Yep, yep, you're so smart, Naruto,'_ he mentally said and patted himself in the back, ignoring Kurama as he grumbled and called out an **'idiot.'**

"I prepared some snack," Sakumo-shiro entered the living room, carring a tray with senbei and milk.

He joined them and placed the snack at the table. Naruto immediately grabbed for the rice cracker and watched Kakashi as he took a gulp of milk. The Jinchuriki was still in awe that this Kakashi let him see his face. Shiro told him that Kakashi never liked others seeing his face and if he let Naruto see it, that means he trusted him. Even if they didn't have the bond that Naruto had with big-Kakashi, chibi-Kakashi trusted him to a degree that he's comfortable with him not wearing a mask.

(Naruto stared at the beauty mark under Kakashk's lip and sulked to himself— damn this pretty boy! Was he also like Sasuke at school? Having fangirls and all that?)

"Why did Sandaime-sama summoned you?"

Naruto was pulled back to reality when he heard Tiny-sensei's question.

Sakumo-shiro sighed as he took a rice cracker for himself, "he'll be sending my team on a mission."

"Are you going to escort a princess, 'ttebayo?!" Naruto exclaimed, remembering his fantasies of a _cool_ mission when they were first given a C-rank mission. (Look at how disastrous that turned out.)

"It's a classified information, Naruto," Shiro said in that kind voice of his as he smile at Naruto as if he's thinking that escorting a princess was an amusing mission, "Councilor Danzo was the one that assigned us the mission, so it's top secret. No need to think over it."

Naruto felt dread pooling at his stomach. He knew that it wasn't a reaction from the breakfast his new Tou-san cooked for him because they were always wonderful or from eating too much rice crackers. _No_. This dread in his stomach was because a memory suddenly resurfaced at the forefront of his mind.

"Kakashi, how old are you?" Naruto asked his chibi sensei.

Kakashi surely noticed Naruto's sudden use of his name but he didn't comment on it, "I just turned six."

( _"Did you know that I met my father when I died at Pein's attack?" Kakashi-sensei asked as he sat next to him._

_Naruto was again plagued by nightmares and instead of going to their usual place, he decided to just sat at the roof of his apartment and look at the splatters of stars in the sky. He wasn't surprised that Kakashi-sensei found him here because it was like the Hatake built a signal on Naruto, telling him whenever the blond needed someone to be at his side. Kakashi-sensei might be lazy and always late, but whenever they needed him, he always arrives on time._

_"Really? How did that happen?" The sixteen-year-old curiously asked._

_"When I died, I met him in a limbo," the gray haired man answered, "it's a place between life and death. Maa... Apparently, he couldn't move on the Pure Lands since he wanted to talk and apologize to me before moving on."_

_Naruto was silent as he absorbed his sensei's word. He furrowed his eyebrows and squinted his eyes in confusion, "why would he apologize, dattebayo?"_

_"When I was six years old, he was sent on a mission with his team. I didn't know the details because it was classified and one of the Elders assigned it to them. He let the mission failed and when he came back, the village was mad at him for his decisions," Kakashi-sensei said and Naruto felt pain in his heart when he heard grief in his teacher's voice. "So in order to clear his name, he... He killed himself. And I was the one who found his body... He was so cold..."_ ) 

Kakashi-sensei rarely let others see his emotions but when he did, it was heartbreaking.

Naruto spent that time listening to the man as he regaled him with tales of how kind and loyal his father was. He was thankful that they've both grown close that they're comfortable at letting each other know what they really feel. Kakashi might have spent his time with Naruto as his teacher with teasing and laziness but after the war, he became the older brother he never knew he needed. 

And _now_ that Naruto suddenly remembered, he couldn't stop but cry internally at his stupidity.

_How_ could he forget?!

How could he think of saving everyone he loves when he forget something _so_ important?! And now that he met Kakashi-sensei's dad and saw how kind the man really was, Naruto couldn't just let him die! He would not let this version of Kakashi be the broken man that he was in Naruto's past.

He just wouldn't let it.

But the question is, _how would he stop it from happening as to how it happened in the past?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wha...what was that? An update? W-what do you mean I have to update? Wha... *nervously slinks back to the Dark Dimension and bargains with Dormammu.
> 
> I'M SO SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE. I was busy with my original works, reading fics and socializing with other fandoms. 
> 
> For curiosity's sake, what's your anime go to? Mine would always be Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood. Sad? BAM! Watch FMAB. Bored? BAM, FMAB! Wanting to stimulate the brain after feeding it with stupidity for so long? BAM! FMAB! (But my go to manga would always be Slam Dunk.) 
> 
> (I was sure that I had a plot laid out for this but each passing chapter, I'm completely taking a detour with how the things progresses with chibi Naruto.)
> 
> Thank you for the hits, kudos and the reviews, it never failed to make me smile on how appreciated this work was. I wasn't able to reply to all your comments (because my social skills was lacking and I don't know what to reply) but know that I loved all of it. THANK YOU! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
> 
> (I did not edit this, beware of typos and grammatical errors.) 
> 
> Drink your water. 
> 
> — Segnor


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Children should never poison someone. It's bad. Seriously, don't.

If someone would tell Naruto that he wasn't built to be a tactician, they should receive an award, a bubble bath, coupons for unlimited Ichiraku ramen for a week and a nice head pat because of how right they would be.

_Naruto_ and _planning_ wasn't even meant to be in the same sentence in the first place and whoever made a sentence using both of the words, should be deported out of the Land of Fire with immediate haste.

He hasn't the aptitude befitting of a Nara for a detailed and intricate plan but even though he wasn't born as a conventional genius, his Mother was _Uzumaki Kushina_ and his father was _Namikaze Minato_. That should be enough of an indication that there would be 98% chance that Uzumaki Naruto would be one of a kind of a _genius._ A genius not in the normal sense because everything he does defies logic and common sense. It's true that Kurama called him a muscle-head shinobi that would come to a war guns ablazing, but what Kurama didn't tell him was that Naruto, in his seventeen-year-old mind and five-year-old body should never _ever_ in a hundred years— construct a plan.

_Poison_. 

That was what Naruto decided when he was ransacking his brain on how in the name of Hagoromo Ōtsutsuki would he save Hatake Sakumo.

Poison. That's what he would do. And if Kurama yelled in his mind how bad of an idea it was to poison a seasoned Jounin let alone a war-veteran of Konoha, Naruto would just tell him that it was for the best.

* * *

Hatake Sakumo was a cautious man.

He wouldn't be a successful Jounin if he wasn't. And if there's one thing that he honed from his years of experience being one of Konohagakure's top shinobi, it was his intuition. He didn't know if his intuition was inherited from a clan that was built upon the pack mentality of a wolf but he was sure that if his intuition tells him that some shit was about to go down, he was always prepared for it.

That's why on the day before he and his teammates would go on an S-rank mission— that would snap the tentative _'truce'_ between Konohagakure and Kirigakure _if_ and _should_ they fail it— he wasn't even closed to surprise dwhen he was summoned to the Hokage's office and told a bad news.

"Poisoned," Sakumo stated in his most deadpan of a voice and his face has the blankest expression ever. He was expecting _something_ to happen. His intuition led him to believe Kami-sama would turn out his luck on him. He's just thankful (and a bit guilty for feeling that because his teammates were poisoned so he shouldn't be feeling guilty) that this didn't happen on the day of the mission.

"They're currently confined at the General Hospital. The medic nins did their best at getting the poison out of their bodies and they are in a stable condition but now that Tsunade left the village, there would be no chance that they will be waking up today or tomorrow," the Hokage explained to him. 

"Will I be taking the mission alone, then?" Sakumo frowned at his question. He has great trust when it comes to his abilities but this mission was meant to be completed by two or three Jounins of his level, it would be impossible for him to do it alone.

"No, I will find a replacement for your teammates but the current roster for the Jounin available for this mission is close to none," Sandaime Hokage took a deep sigh as he started cleaning his pipe, deep lines framing his forehead as he thought of how stressful this day had become.

Sakumo tried to think of a Jounin that could accompany him on this mission but he remembered how he met his fellow Jounin at the mission command's office and almost all of them were complaining how the village weren't giving them time to rest. It would seem that because of the Second Shinobi War, the village was accepting missions left and right to replace the profit that was lost from the war.

"What of Jiraiya?" Sakumo asked. He worked with Jiraiya before in a mission and even though he has his... _uniqueness_ , he's a good teammate.

"He hoisted Minato on an trip to Takigakure," the Sandaime answered, "he said that there were strange sightings and he needed to investigate. It seems he needed Minato's output."

The White Fang nodded, "I see."

"I will summon you if I find a replacement for your teammates. We can't afford to postpone this mission," the Hokage told dismissed him and Sakumo respectfully bowed as he exited the office.

His mission hasn't even started yet and it already was a problem. 

Sakumo's intuition told him to prepare for the worse and if he overpacked for this mission and wrote his will, no one would know.

(He immediately clutched Kakashi at his chest when he got home and the younger grunted in surprise and told the younger Hatake that he needed a hug because Papa's feeling stressed.)

* * *

Naruto's morals for someone who grew up in a village that normized a child soldier was shocking. Maybe at the deepest darkest part of his mind, he really was crazy. That's why when he didn't feel guilty for poisoning someone, he asked Kurama about it.

_'Should I be worried that I'm not guilty, dattebayo?'_ Naruto asked with a confused tone.

**'Why should you?'** The Kyuubi answered, **'I told you it was a bad idea because you might get harmed but when it turned out successful. The two shinobi were alive and you didn't kill them. So, kit, why would you feel guilty?'**

(Naruto shouldn't always believe the Kyuubi because in the first place, morality wasn't also his best subject at school. But being the chibi that he was— he fully believed him.)

Naruto thought about what he did earlier and he wasn't really guilty about it. In his Genin days, he found out that he has an affinity for poison.

The way he found out about it was accidental.

You see, Team 7 was frustrated at the fact that Kakashi-sensei was so secretive with them. They didn't know anything about him aside from his name and his laziness and Naruto wondered outloud, when he was with Sasuke-teme and Sakura-chan, when his birthday was. They thought about it and they didn't want to ask Kakashi because they know that he would not answer them. So, Naruto suggested that they should just choose a random date and celebrate it. Surprisingly, it was Sasuke-teme who chose the date of it and Sakura told them that they should prepare a gift for him. 

As a child, Naruto took pranking as a part time job despite not really getting money for doing it and took planting as a hobby because it calms him down. Being the broke child that he was, he decided to give his sensei Mr. Ukki, a plant that Naruto personally grew, and he was certain that Sakura and Sasuke would surely give their sensei something expensive. So, Naruto decided that he also should cook for him because he felt like his gift wouldn't be enough for the gray-haired man. It turns out that he really shouldn't have bothered cooking because Kakashi-sensei said that Mr. Ukki would be enough and he would treasure it. Still, the Jinchuriki gave Kakashi what he prepared and Sakura-chan told their sensei that it would be rude to decline what Naruto made for him. 

Hours later, after lots of panicking from the three Genin, they were gathered next to Kakashi-sensei's hospital bed and when the man woke up, the first thing he said was that Naruto should never cook for someone. 

(He didn't know why his cooking was poisonous when he could eat it just fine. Years later, after that incident, Kurama explained that it was because he was subconsciously healing Naruto whenever he's eating what he cooked for himself. There's a reason why he always ate cup ramen and why he wasn't allowed cooking when they're at a mission.) 

He knew in himself that Sakumo-shiro's teammates wouldn't actually die from his food poisoning because Kakashi-sensei was the proof that they would survive. 

_'Okay!'_ He just answered cheerfully and looked at Orochimaru.

"We should give Hokage-jiji some of these, 'ttebayo, he said he liked the breakfast you cooked for him yesterday and I'm sure he would also love ramen!" Even if Naruto didn't want to share his new father's ramen to anyone, he felt like he should atleast give Hokage-jiji a peace offering for his sudden act of poisoning two of his Jounins (even though he didn't know that it was Naruto who did it.)

"We would after you finished eating," Orochi-tou told him and gave him another serving of ramen.

(If in this time, Teuchi-san and Ayame-nee wouldn't be planning to build Ichiraku's, Naruto has a back up plan of making a ramen stand of their own. His Tou-san would be the chef and he would be his helper. _It would be perfect!_ )

* * *

Orochimaru kneeled down to adjust the scarf at his son's (cue chest pain here) neck and gave a soft smile when the Uzumaki beamed at him. He adopted Naruto as his son but he didn't feel the need to change his name. Not only does he not have a surname because the Sannin didn't have a clan when his parents were still alive but he felt that Naruto was the embodiment of his name.

( _His little Maelstrom_.)

When he deemed Naruto presentable, he stood up and knocked at the Hokage's office door. He and his son (he really needs the opinion of a heart specialist) entered and the latter greeted the occupants of the room.

"Jiji! Tou-san made ramen and we packed some for you!" He greeted Sarutobi-sensei and looked at Hatake Sakumo, "Shiro! If I know you'll be here, we'll also make some for you, dattebayo!"

"It's fine, Naruto," Sakumo smiled and looked at Orochimaru who stood near him.

"Are we intruding?" The Sannin decided to ask after Naruto gave the bento box to his sensei. He noticed the deep frown the Sandaime wore when they entered.

Sarutobi-sensei regarded him for a second as Naruto decided to sit on his lap. Orochimaru saw Sakumo sigh and he thought that it must have been serious based on the expression on their faces.

"Watanabe Ki and Ito Ryuji were admitted earlier at the hospital for food poisoning," his sensei started, "they're in a stable condition but they won't be able to join Sakumo with their mission tomorrow. I haven't found a suitable Jounin for their replacement."

Even with the incomplete explanation, Orochimaru understood the hidden implication that the village couldn't afford to lose this mission. He didn't know the specifics and Sarutobi-sensei didn't give him enough details, because Naruto was with them, but the Snake Sannin knew that if he assigned it to Hatake Sakumo and to two Jounin— the mission would have been S-rank. The loss of this mission would either mean that it would endanger the village itself or its relationship with the neighboring hidden villages. Orochimaru was intelligent enough to know that in this case, it would be the latter. Relationship with other shinobi villages were delicate due to the recent boundary skirmishes.

"If you have no one, then I'll be willing to assist Sakumo," Orochimaru suggested and both Sandaime Hokage and the White Fang looked at him with hidden surprise. 

He didn't know what made him volunteer himself for a mission with this importance when he himself wasn't known for assisting someone on a mission. It's either he'd be the mission leader or he would take the mission alone. The only time he would take a mission that he wouldn't lead was when he was with his fellow Sannin, so he understood why both men reacted like that. What he wasn't expecting was for his son to look at him as if he turned off the sun or more exactly— he denied him of ramen privileges. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I DON'T KNOW IF THIS CHAPTER WAS LACKING OR NOT ENTERTAINING ENOUGH. I DON'T KNOOOOOWWWW. (I'm so stressed.)
> 
> I wrote a long ass note about Kishimoto's timeline (how shitty it was) but I didn't manage to save it. Long story short, Naruto's timeline was shit. Seriously, I couldn't find details on how long each shinobi wars lasted but I do know that this is fictional and I shouldn't have been expecting a detailed information about them. I'm having a hard time constructing something when I don't have a definite basis, that's why I'm making shit up about what Sakumo's last mission was. 
> 
> Minato and the gang (his generation: Shikaku, Hiashi and Hizashi, Kushina, etc.) were 16-18 at this fic. Minato was 24 when he died and this fic took place 7-8 years before that. He was the Jounin sensei of Team 7 when he was 19 years old but before that, he already have Kakashi at 16. I don't know when the hell he became a Jounin but I'm just putting his genius at face value and say that he's already a Jounin at this age. I'm too tired reading about the shinobi wars to tackle about Minato's details. Seriously, the timeline... I give up on the timeline. 
> 
> I'm sorry if this chapter wasn't what you're expecting but I'm too stressed out from scavenging Naruto details and thinking how the hell Naruto would save Sakumo made me want to gut a fish and swallow it uncooked. And because this is my fic, I get to decide what the hell happened. But seriously though, your ideas and suggestions were wonderful but I already got to read them in some of the fics concerning saving Sakumo and I wouldn't be a crack writer if I don't use unconventional means. Thus, poison and Orochimaru. 
> 
> (Watanabe Ki and Ito Ryujin are OCs. They're not that important so no need to remember them.)
> 
> (Because of stress, I started re-reading Gintama and I'm in the middle of deciding whether I should finish reading it first even though I already finished it last year or should I watch the anime.)
> 
> THANK YOU ALL FOR THE SUPPORT AND LOVE ✲ﾟ｡.(✿╹◡╹)ﾉ .｡₀:*ﾟ✲ﾟ*:₀｡
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down, bitch.
> 
> — Segnor


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a new baby sitter in town.

**'Kit, I can't believe that things would turn out this way, I'm not supposed to be your moral compass,'** Kurama complained and shuddered as he felt how wrong his statement was. Him guiding Naruto when it comes to this thing was just like stating Gai and Lee's atrocious outfit would be the next fashion trend. Meaning? It's not supposed to happen. **'You should stop what you're planning on doing.'**

_'Oh, yeah?'_ Naruto, being the irritatingly adorable child that he was, took his words as a challenge, _'watch me.'_

**'No, Naruto,'** Kurama said as if he's scolding an unruly kit.

Naruto pouted, _'yes, Naruto!'_

**'NO.'**

Kurama smiled smugly to himself when Naruto backed down and he knew he won this round.

(Naruto poisoning the Sannin? Not happening.) 

* * *

Lying his back on the bed and body covered with warm blankets, Naruto stopped counting ninkens to sleep when he suddenly heard soft padding of footsteps coming near him. He tilted his head to watch as the Sannin lifted the blankets and joined Naruto on the bed. The child immediately sauntered over to fit his small body next to his father's colder one (since he has a Bijuu inside of him, his body's like a small furnace, when he asked Kurama why that was, the Kyuubi just answered that there were things that should be left alone and not questioned).

"Are you done packing?" Naruto asked.

"Not yet, I'll finish it tomorrow," Orochimaru answered him and Naruto made a confused noise.

"But your mission's tomorrow, dattebayo. You have to finish packing your seals now so that you won't forget everything you'll need," Naruto reasoned out as he remembered Kakashi-sensei's lesson about packing before a mission out of the village. He said they all should do it before the day of the mission so every essential stuff they needed would be packed on their seals. Naruto thought that the lesson was important because he sometimes forget packing extra ramen. So, when he does the packing at night, he made sure to buy an excessive amount of cup ramen and pack it for the mission.

You wouldn't know how many emergency ramen you'd need afterall.

"I don't do overpacking unlike some shinobi," Orochimaru said in a flat voice, remembering a certain Sannin, and Naruto wasn't sure but he was slightly offended by it. "Besides, I noticed you couldn't sleep."

Oh. "Yeah," Naruto nodded his head, snuggling closer to his Tou-san (ha! He has one now that he could call a father in his mind and could proudly tell to anyone— he's adopted, sure, but Naruto didn't care.)

"Are you worried?" The Snake Sannin asked him and Naruto hummed as he felt his Orochi-tou started combing and patting his hair, "don't be, little fox."

"You will come back, right?" The Jinchuriki asked and he suddenly threw his hands againts his father and clutched at him tightly, "you _need_ to come back, 'ttebayo."

"Of course, I will. I will always come back."

Naruto nodded his head against his Tou-san's neck and that's just the confirmation he needed. He would come back. He would.

He wouldn't leave Naruto.

( _He wouldn't_.)

* * *

It was a beautiful day.

The sun was shining high in the sky. The birds were singing. Shinobi could be seen running above the roofs, doing their ninja business. The Hidden Village of the Leaf was bustling like normal. It was a very beautiful day, but the perpetually sunny expression on Naruto's face was absent, it was not _beautiful._

Kakashi already knew that he would have a very long, long week.

(He dearly hoped that his Papa's mission would not last _that_ long when it's just the first day and Naruto's already frowning.)

The little Hatake let the silence envelope their duo as they diligently walked towards their destination. He couldn't believe that his father had the gall to call a babysitter for him when he could take care of himself, thank you very much, and he didn't _need_ a babysitter. But when Sakumo explained that Naruto would also be alone at Orochimaru's house, the blond would surely feel lonely by himself. So, as the dutiful shinobi that he was— willing to help others in need just like what his father taught him— he relented at Sakumo's request and joined the Uzumaki on having a babysitter.

So, here they were now, walking towards the house of their babysitter as Sakumo thought that it would be best if they stayed at the sitter's house and not at the wide and empty traditional house. His father told him and Naruto that it would be just like a _sleepover_ , it would be _fun_.

(Sometimes Kakashi wondered how his father's brain works. Since Naruto came, the man turned— dare he say it— _childlike_. The changes were very little and subtle, if you would look at him, you wouldn't notice it but Kakashi started observing his father ever since he let a stray Uzumaki entered their house and called them _horrible_ nicknames, so he knew that the man was starting to change in very small ways.)

(He didn't know if his father was always like that and Kakashi's just started noticing it.)

(He loved it though.)

( _Especially the hugs_.)

(Hmm, he loved the hugs.)

Kakashi stopped his blasphemous thoughts when he heard the smaller boy next to him heaved a deep sigh as if he's carrying the weight of the whole Nation in his shoulders. They stopped walking once they reached their sitter's front door and Kakashi couldn't take the endless sighing anymore. 

"Naruto if you take another sigh, I will not let you train throwing kunai with me anymore," Kakashi lightly threatened.

"How pre-pa... preto— prespo—"

"Preposterous," Kakashi supplied.

"How _preposterous_ , dattebayo!" Naruto exclaimed, "you said you would take me to the Academy tomorrow to train! Shame on you..."

"Then stop worring about your Tou-san," the Hatake stated, "they will be fine. Your Tou-san's a Sannin and Papa's the White Fang. Do you know the people who would willingly face them in a battle are called?"

"What?"

" _Dumb_. They're called dumb and dumb people never last long on a battle," Kakashi answered and Naruto had a sudden epiphany.

(Kakashi-sensei always called him an idiot but never ever used the word dumb. Naruto's an idiot and _not dumb_ because _"dumb people always die first on a battle."_ It's a logic that the Team 7 always held on whenever they're on a mission and it always work— much to the gratitude of Sasuke-teme that he didn't die surrounded by dumb people. Normal people might not understand how Team Seven's logic works, it really just makes no sense, but hearing that words on the lips of his chibi-sensei now, it was the last straw to put Naruto at ease.)

Kakashi watched as Naruto's face turned on its sunny switch on and grinned at him, "uhn! They'll be fine!"

The smaller Hatake observed the younger boy's face and when he was nearly blinded by the brilliant grin, he knew that Naruto's alright now. He nodded to himself and he smiled back at the blond child, not knowing that he did the infamous the eye-smile his big version always wore.

"You... You two are so cute!"

Hands suddenly grabbed the two boy's body and a warm body encased the both of them. Kakashi was immediately assaulted by the smell of jasmine, ink and... _Ramen_?

He heard Naruto wheezing at his side and he could also feel the absence of oxygen on his lungs, so he frantically tapped the young woman's arms, "you're killing us."

The young woman let them go with a squeal delighted squeal. _Oh no_. No, no, no, no! Has Kami-sama finally abandoned him at the age of six? Was this heaven's divine retribution for his sin of enjoying watching others lament over the mystery of his mask?

Just why.

_Why?_

Of all the available babysitters in the village, why would it be her? 

"I'm Uzumaki Kushina and I'd be your babysitter until your fathers came back! It's an official mission I took up, dattebane!" The red-haired Uzumaki introduced herself and Kakashi felt dread at the meaning of her words.

"Aren't you a Chunin? Why would you take babysitting for an official mission when that's supposed to be a D-rank?" Kakashi asked.

"Because I _can_ and I _want_ to," Kushina proudly answered. "So, you two should call me Kushina-nee!" 

"Kushina-nee!" The blond Uzumaki excitedly parroted and that made him receive another one of those bone crushing hugs.

Kakashi let his self-preservation do its job and stayed silent. He watched Naruto be smothered with hugs and he couldn't just imagine how he would survive surrounded with both over-enthusiastic Uzumaki at all times.

One was enough, _two_ would be an overkill.

Just like _sleepover_ , he said. 

It would be _fun_ , he said. 

If Naruto petitioned for a child's right to adopt a parent, could Kakashi write a petition for a child's right to disown a parent? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! If you have nothing else to do, check out my new fic entitled Hatake Kakshi's Series of (Un)Fortunate Events, it's just like this one but it's more fucked up and I have no plan whatsoever with how the plot in there would turn out~ I'm just a sucker for time travel/dimension hopping and crack fics! 
> 
> By the way, what's your favorite movie? Seriously, I have so many favorite movie that I don't even know how to ranked them up! I think somewhere up there, the Terminal would be ranking first, close with Pirates of the Caribbean, MCU and the Hobbit franchise. I'm a Tolkien geek, I love all his works, it's just— everything's brilliant and my favorite character would be Lord Elrond, Thranduil (even tho he's not in the books), Bilbo Baggins and it may be weird, but I love Mairon or as the non-book reader would call him as Sauron. I know he's the Dark Lord and all, but come on, the dude made an effort to be a powerful villain. 
> 
> I'm having this Howl's Moving Castle addiction right now even though it's been years since I've first watched the movie. Studio Ghibli's knocking at my doorsteps bringing nostalgia and childhood memories! 
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down, bitch. 
> 
> — Segnor


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Iruka-sensei said dis-lek-see-uh.

Uzumaki Kushina was— one word— _amazing_. Naruto had never imagined that his Kaa-chan turned Kushina-nee would be this wonderful of a young woman.

"How are the both of you still alive?" Tiny-sensei asked in a blank voice, eyes devoid of life as he stared at the two Uzumaki that has been inhaling instant ramen for the past thirty minutes— stacking each empty cup at their sides that would determine who would win at this sudden eating competition.

"Next one!" Kushina-nee yelled after finishing a cup and turning to her right to look at the remaining cup ramen and a crestfallen expression befell her face as she found it empty.

"I won!" Naruto cheered to himself after he finished his and found out that he has eaten more than the older Uzumaki.

"That's unfair, 'ttebane!" Kushina-nee complained, "I'm not even full yet, you're just faster at eating than me. This won't determine the _Ramen King_!"

Naruto let a smug smirk replace his giddy expression as he crossed his arms in his chest, "that's three to two with me at the top, I'm the Ramen King, Uzumaki Naruto, dattebayo!"

He stared at his mother turned sister (that was kind of a weird thing to think, now that he thought of it but— oh well) until she relented and she nodded happily at him.

"Hurrah for the Ramen King!" The red-haired Uzumaki cheered.

"Hurrah!" Naruto toned, wiggling a little as he did his victory dance.

"Huzzah for the Ramen King!" 

"Huzzah!" Naruto once again yelled and the two Uzumaki bursted out laughing like a pair of deranged lunatic that has seen society for the first time after years of isolation. 

They'd been having eating competition ever since yesterday to determine who would be the Ramen King between the two Uzumaki and it made Naruto felt smug that Kushina-nee finally gave him the title of it. Naruto was so excited to find out that Kushina would be their babysitter because finally, he would have the time to bond with her and the experience didn't disappoint his younger self's imagination on what it would feel like to be with his mother. Sure, their relationship at this point weren't mother and son considering that she was still a teenager, young and she didn't bear him at her tummy and she didn't know that technically, she's his son, but still— sharing a bond with Uzumaki Kushina was an unforgettable experience for Naruto. She's beautiful, smart, funny and just like him, she loves ramen too! Naruto was so thrilled when he found out that he shared the same love of ramen with thw older Uzumaki and he immediately challenged her on a competition.

"Can we go now? At this rate I'd be late for school and that would be very unbecoming," the tiny Hatake said.

Naruto stared at his friend for a second and he hit his fist at the top of his palm as a sudden epiphany came over him at the gray-haired boy's words, "oh, yeah! You're taking me to the Academy today, dattebayo!"

"I won't take you if we don't leave now."

"What are we waiting for then?!" The red-haired young woman excitedly yelled, grabbing the two children and tucking each child in her armpit, "to the Academy!"

"To the Academy!" Naruto mimicked and raised a fist as if he's going to fly.

"Stop carrying me!" Tiny-sensei complained in a high tone but the two insane Uzumaki ignored him.

Kakashi resigned to his fate and ask the heavens above what did he do in his past life to deserve this. 

(He didn't think that he kick puppies and bully kittens for a hobby in his past life because that would be the ultimate form of evil.)

Meanwhile, Naruto was having the time of his life, listening to Kushina-nee as she chattered endlessly about her Academy days.

* * *

Naruto remembered now why he hated the Academy. 

When they entered the premise of the school and after reassuring Kushina-nee that the both of them would be alright and they would be fine without her guidance for the day (Tiny-sensei grumbled something here that suspiciously sounded like: _"not that you aren't a living and breathing child hazard,"_ ) they entered Kakashi's classroom. Naruto didn't know if he would be allowed to be with Kakashi's class because he wasn't their classmate but Kakashi told his plan to his father and Sakumo already asked the Hokage-jiji to make a form for him to allow him to be with the class. He wouldn't technically be a student yet (because he's not enrolled and for that he would need to take an exam) but he would be allowed to be with the class for a day. Kakashi gave the permission slip to his teacher and they both entered the class. Naruto didn't have the luxury to identify familiar faces because he was instantly whisked away by Tiny-sensei and dragged to sit next to him. 

As he grimly next to Kakashi and listen to the sensei as he discussed something about _theories_ or whatever that was making him feel sleepy, he remembered that he used to hate the Academy. It's not that he hated it because he didn't get to graduate two times in a row or because everyone was constantly ignoring him and the only reason that they would take notice of him would be for him to prank them to feel that _'yes, he's also here and can they please stop ignoring me because it hurts?'_ No. That's not his reason. Well... Some of that was the reason why he hated school but the main cause was that he understood nothing of what the teachers were teaching.

Ero-sennin and Kakashi-sensei told him that he learned best by experiencing what he should be learning and not by sitting down and listening to long, boring lectures. He also thought that it was because he couldn't read and write well when he was a child. The only one who bothered teaching him to read and write was Hokage-jiji but even him didn't exactly understood the extent of how _hard_ it was for him to comprehend letters. His past teacher would tell him how lazy and stupid he was because he couldn't understand simple mathematical problem and even reading basic words. He got so frustrated by this that he gave up with it, that was until Iruka-sensei noticed this and patiently told him that he would be willing to teach Naruto if he would let him.

Iruka-sensei told him that he had something called _dis-lek-see-uh_ and he's not stupid for having it. It took them a long time for Naruto to improve his relationship with numbers and letters that by the time he was first learning Kage Bunshin no Jutsu, it only took him fifteen minutes to read the first paragraph and he just followed the drawn hand movements to learn the Jutsu. And when he was reading Ero-sennin's _'Tales of a Gutsy Ninja'_ , he managed to finish it without being frustrated at himself. It also helped that when Ero-sennin found out about his dis-lek-see-uh, he convinced Naruto to proofread and edit all his books (sure, Icha Icha wasn't supposed to be used as a practicing book for reading but hey, it sure did help him!)

(And when he was writing his petition form for Hokage-jiji, he was proud to say that it wasn't hard for him to do at all.)

(His dis-lek-see-uh was also the reason why Ero-sennin gave up on teaching him Fuinjutsu. Because if he has a hard time understanding basic letter, it would be a torture for him to learn sealing.) 

Long story short, Naruto's having a headache looking at the squiggles written in the board. With how fast the Sensei was at writing things at the board and how slow he was at his talking, the chibi Uzumaki wasn't having a great time.

"You're frowning," Tiny-sensei whispered to him without breaking his eye contact at the discussion in front of them, "is there something wrong."

If the whiskered Uzumaki didn't know his sensei well, he wouldn't see the concern hiding behind those blank eyes of his seatmate.

Naruto pouted and crossed his arms, "I'm bored," he almost whined. He's not hiding his learning disabilities because he's ashamed of it but he wouldn't tell it to Kakashi now. He's pretty sure that if he did, Tiny-sensei would whisk him away from here and help him instead. And he didn't want that. He wanted Kakashi to help him improve his kunai throwing abilities (because at this age and body, he's shit at it) and he would just tell it to him some other day.

_And, he's really bored._ So, that's that. 

Tiny-sensei eyed him, estimating the truth of his words and when seconds passed and he realized that Naruto was telling him the truth, "endure it for another minute, Sensei will be ending his discussion now. And the next class will be physical assessment. I'm not required to join them because I already aced the subject and I'll be helping you with your throws instead."

Naruto looked at his friend ~~brotherbrotherbrotherbrother~~ as if he hung the stars, "you're so cool, 'ttebayo!"

* * *

At his excitement that Tiny-sensei and him would be _bonding_ , Naruto forgot that he should've probably scanned Kakashi's teammates for familiar faces. He was bouncing at his step as he followed the white-haired child at the empty target range after Tiny-sensei told the teacher that they would be practicing there and he gave them kunais to use.

They stopped fifteen feet in front of a target and Kakashi lend him a sharp kunai to use.

"Hold it. Aim. _Throw_."

_And there goes the kunai sailing through the air, hitting the dead center of the target._

Naruto looked blankly at the kunai embedded in the target then to Kakashi and he repeated the cycle until his friend understood what he meant. 

"Oh," Tiny-sensei said.

"Yeah, _oh_ , dattebayo," Naruto told him, nodding to himself as he positioned himself— mimicking how Kakashi did it earlier to show to the white-haired child that he wouldn't be able to do it with just that, "I'm not a genius like you, Tiny-sensei. This would just—"

Thunk. 

Naruto's jaw dropped and his eyes widened as he saw his kunai hitting the outline of the center of the target.

Silence.

Silence blanketed the two child. Naruto silently freaking out because _what the hell just happened! That shouldn't even be possible because Naruto knew in himself that he's shit at using weapons_. And Kakashi wondering if maybe the blond Uzumaki next to him was someone just like him. More boisterous and energetic but _still, like him_.

And the silence wouldn't even break until a loud voice was heard.

"HOW INSPIRING!" A voice exclaimed— no, _boomed_... A voice boomed and thunderous footsteps ran towards them, "THE SPRING OF YOUTH FINALLY BLOSSOMING US WITH ITS BEAUTY!"

Both boys swiveled back to stare at the newcomer and stars sparkled in Naruto's eyes as he stared at the child with red scarf in his neck, green sleeveless jumpsuit, black hair and white teeth shining under the influence of the sun. The true image of—

" _YOUTH!_ DATTEBAYO!" Naruto boomed and laughed like a mad man— happiness enveloping him at the sight of a young Maito Gai.

"YOUTH!" Bushy-brow agreed and joined Naruto in his _Nice Guy Pose_.

"Oh, no," Kakashi _whimpered_ with horror in his voice. " _No..._ " 

(Kakashi finally believed in Kami. And if they exist, they were having a great time laughing at him.) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (If y'all received a notification about the update for this chapter but came up with nothing, it's just me being stupid and accidentally pressing the post button! I'm so jitteryyyy and would blame it to the coffee. Damn you, drink of Heaven.)
> 
> I ignored the fact that Gai and Kakashi are the same age in cannon (idk what's real anymore) and that they enrolled at the same time in the Academy but Gai wasn't able to pass the exam because if I follwed that, I wouldn't be able to make Gai appear in this chapter. And a short note, Obito and Rin were three years older than Kakashi but in the anime they were portrayed as if they're at the same age with how Kakashi and Obito has the same age and Rin having a crush at Kakashi. IF THIS FACT WAS WRONG, I DON'T CARE AT ALL BECAUSE KISHIMOTO'S TIMELINE IS A SHIT AND THAT'S THAT! HA!
> 
> THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU ALL for the support and the love! I appreciate all the hits, kudos, comments and bookmarks this li'l fic of mine has been receiving! May the odds be ever in your favor... And Happy Hunger Games! Tee hee!
> 
> AND OH YEAH, CHECK MY OTHER FIC IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO READ AND IF YOU ENJOYED THE WORLD TORMENTING KAKASHI! 
> 
> Drink yo watet and calm down, bitch. 
> 
> — Segnor


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of a mission that would inevitably result in a headache.

In Naruto's future-past, there wasn't any information regarding the mission Sakumo took that others believed was the starting ember of the Third Shinobi War (if it really was or wasn't, nobody knows aside from some individuals that chose to obscure the details of the mission). But in this timeline precisely, Sakumo and Orochimaru's mission would rang throughout Elemental Nations as an event that no one would ever forget, even if the names of said S-Rank shinobi were completely hidden from that event.

_Why_ , might you ask, _did it turn unforgettable?_

Let's just say that Orochimaru and Sakumo's mission did not _fail_ in the way that some were hoping for. It did not even succeeded.

But it sure did ended with a bang.

An _spectacular bang_ that involved lots and lots of glitters and structural damage not even the likes of Tsunade could re-create. 

But before discussing about the ending, why not start in the beginning of this shit?

* * *

Orochimaru, or Mizuki as his alias for the mission, tightened the purple scarf in his neck after reaching the destination of their mission as he and Sakumo smiled at the shinobi guarding the entrance to the village of Kiri.

"Honeymoon?" The shinobi with Kirigakure's hitai-ate tied at his neck asked and eyed the two of them.

Sakumo, or his alias Shiro (for some reason, he didn't bother to think of a name and just used Naruto's nickname for him), nodded bashfully, "yep! We just had our wedding last week!"

"Kiri's not a place one should think of when thinking of honeymoon," the other gate guard pondered and there's a suspicious lilt in his tone.

"Oh! My husband and I are planning to visit your beaches and exhibits to see for ourselves why Kiri's famous for their deep see sharks," Sakumo reasoned out. He pulled a paper from his coat and handed it to the two shinobi, "we even have a permission from the Daimyo to come visit here because after our honeymoon, we will have a summit at the Land of Water's Capital to talk about our research and findings to aspiring young scientists."

"Oh," the gate guard said, inspecting their permit and seeing the Daimyo's seal, he handed them entrance registrations for their village, "looks legit."

Orochimaru filled up his papers and when he and Sakumo finished, they gave it back to the guarding shinobi. 

"Welcome to Kirigakure! And congrats on the wedding..." he trailed off, reading their shared surnames, " _Mr. and Mr. Inu_."

"Thank you," Orochimaru demurely replied and tugged his husband— Sakumo— to enter the village. Sakumo stuttered a goodbye.

After few minutes of walking, trying to look scholarly and as tourist-y as possible, Orochimaru spoke, adjusting his hold at Sakumo's waist.

"That worked," he commented, shaking his head no at the vendor that offered him a jewelry.

"Why did that even worked?" Sakumo asked, clearly baffled as to how the hell their excuses for entering Kirigakure even worked.

The mission detailed that it would be hard for them to enter the village as there were rumors of conflict inside the village. While they were traveling, Sakumo was thinking of ways on how to infiltrate the village seeing that he and Orochimaru were both famous with their contribution at the Second Shinobi War. Then, lo and behold, Orochimaru suggested that they entered the village using the front gates, disguising as married scientists wanting to study Kiri's marine biology and ecosystem. At first, Sakumo was hesitant to agree because he knew that it wouldn't work because shinobi gate guards were trained to distinguish between real tourists from shinobi trying to infiltrate their village, but when Orochimaru revealed the content of one of his scrolls, Sakumo agreed.

Who would've think that the Snake Sannin was an expert at make up and costume design?

When Orochimaru was finished _'fixing'_ his new look, Sakumo couldn't even recognize himself.

(The man was brilliant and unconventional. Sakumo smiled at this thought.)

Orochimaru just told him to act like an excitable and lovable husband and no one would suspect a thing from them.

( _"Why do we have to be married husbands?" Sakumo asked, a bit curious on the Sannin's reasons._

_"Because if they will not let us in, it will answer my pondering whether Kiri's full of homophobic people." Orochimaru answered seriously._

_Sakumo outwardly smiled and thought, 'what the hell?'_ ) 

And it worked. 

(Sakumo was used to assassination missions, blending with the dark and all that shit and its his first time trying this method of infiltrating and he's damn impressed with its simplicity.)

(What Naruto said was true, some genius do not have common sense. Sadly, sometimes Sakumo belonged to that category.)

"When you have a pervert and a gambler for a teammate, you would learn how to hide in plain sight," the Sannin answered, fussing .

Sakumo smiled at him and they entered the first hotel they saw. They aquired a honeymoon suite— to add to the authenticity of their cover— and immediately went to the marine exhibit the lady at the reception told them to visit.

Sakumo and Orochimaru acted like how people expected a newly married couple act like, while still maintaining the senses a shinobi in a deadly mission should have. 

As a three-week mission, Sakumo and Orochimaru haven't yet talked on the details of how they would execute their real purpose at Kirigakure but it seems, Lady Luck was at their sides this time when Sakumo swiveled his head to stare at the yelling he heard and found the heiress of the Kaguya Clan.

Kaguya Kimi. The daughter of their would-be victim.

The woman was wearing a white yukata with sakura petals swirling at the hem of the sleeves, a pink obi tied at her waist, brown long hair tied in an intricate bun and burgundy marks dotting her face atop her eyebrows— displaying the markings of Kaguya Clan. Sakumo thought that the woman was of beauty but only if her face wasn't wrinkled up in an expression of anger.

"You disgusting animal! How many times do I have to tell you not to follow me?!" The woman yelled.

"But, Kimi-sama, your father—"

"I do not care what my father said! I told him not to accept you when your parents died because of how disgusting you look! Ugh!" Kaguya Kimi released a huff of frustration and pushed the child she's yelling at near the shark tank. "Why don't you live in that tank with those sharks? You look like them, surely you can live with them."

And with those derogatory words, she walked out of the observatory, yelling at the people she's with to ignore the child or else she'd fire them.

Sakumo stared at the gangly looking child. He had a distinctive shark-like appearance, complete with pale and bluish gray skin complexion. He has small, round, white eyes, three sets of curved facial markings under his eyes and when he opened his mouth to mumble something at his breath, Sakumo caught a glimpse of sharp triangular teeth. He thought back on Kaguya Kimi's words and he couldn't help but agree that he looked like a shark but still, her words were uncalled for. Especially for a child.

(Something sharp pricked at Sakumo's chest when the child clutched at the hem of his oversized shirt— looking as if he's trying to control the emotions he's feeling.) 

(He couldn't help but think that if it was Kakashi in this child's position, Sakumo would gladly carve the heart out of someone who dared to belittle his child.) 

Before he knew it, Orochimaru— or Mizuki— was already at the child's side. Staring deeply at the boy.

Sakumo's eyes widened when he looked at Orochimaru's expression. He may not believe in the village rumors but Sakumo knew that as much as Orochimaru was a loyal shinobi of Konoha, he was also a scientist. And the glint in his eyes, spell trouble.

(He remembered a story that Jiraiya once told him, something about a subject that deeply fascinated the Snake Sannin that even the sounds of raging war couldn't stop his curiosity of pursuing it.)

(Jiraiya told him that it almost resulted in Tsunade amputating Orochimaru if he wouldn't stop his fascination at wanting to dissect Hanzo the Salamander.)

He just hoped that Orochimaru did not want to dissect this child. Because first; that would be unethical and Sakumo wouldn't let him, second; this was a child they're talking about and third; they're in the middle of their mission for Kami's sake!

"Can you breathe underwater?" The Snake Sannin asked the child, placing a hand in his cheeks while thinking deeply, "do you have gills?"

The child, who Sakumo now knew to not have a self-preservation, nodded. "Yeah, I can and I do. Kimi-sama told me that it was because I'm an animal."

Sakumo winced at the child's words.

Orochimaru hummed, "I'm Mizuki and that's my husband, Shiro. What's your name?"

"Hoshigaki Kisame," he grinned full of sharp teeth.

Sakumo didn't know it yet, but at this very moment, the details of their mission were starting to crumble apart. Because Hoshigaki Kisame would play a huge role at the glittery ending of this Kami forsaken mission.

(But if only Sakumo knew his fate at the future-past, he would gladly accept the shit that happened in this one.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IF MY WRITING STYLE SUDDENLY CHANGED, I'M SORRY! ALSO, I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT SAKUMO'S LAST MISSION, SO I MADE SHIT UP. AND YEAH, KISAME'S HERE. 
> 
> For all those who read my past author's notes, you would know that my health's not always in the best condition and yep, I'm currently sick. I always had a poor respiratory system and was prone to sickness. So, between my poor health and some stuff that I was busy with, I couldn't find the time to write and I'm really sorry for not updating. 
> 
> I re-read the whole fic to remember what the hell I wrote and let me tell you, my head ached because of typographical and grammatical errors, I dunno how some of y'all just ignored that and still had the patience to read this, but thanks tho. Some may ask why I have lots of errors in writing, well, I actually write whenever I'm deep in meds or just in plain need of sleep. But, I was editing some of the chaptets and I'm not finished yet. And thanks to those who pointed out my mistakes! It really helped me editing this mess! 
> 
> THIS NOTE IS LONG, SHIT. 
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down, bitch. 
> 
> — Segnor


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sakumo didn't really know what he signed up into when Orochimaru decided to be his partner for this mission.

The mission entails in simpler words:

  * Infiltrate Kirigakure
  * Observe the Kaguya Clan
  * Assassinate the Clan Head, Kaguya Kirihito, before the Clan's possible coup d'etat
  * Finish the mission without being seen, heard or sensed



Those were the details of the mission in layman's terms.

Yes, it's an assassination job but as to why it may or may not start a war and break the silent treaty between Kirigakure and Konohagakure, the reason for that was because Kaguya Kirihito was one of the possible Yondaime Mizukage candidates and the Clan was one of the most influential clans inside the village— it would be most comparable to the status of the Hyuuga's of Konoha.

The mission almost looked like a suicide mission because not only were they tasked to infiltrate Kiri when the village was already in an unrest, but also, assassinating Kaguya Kirihito would be next to impossible especially if the rumors of his and his clan's plan to revolt were true, meaning, the Clan would be in a state of constant paranoia. Sakumo and Orochimaru didn't know who supplied the information for the Clan's possible revolt and neither of them asked as to who was their client. They didn't even know why the Hokage would sanction a mission like this, risking the lives of the shinobi tasked for the job and therefore, may risk the safety of Konoha if they were found out.

(Neither of them bothered to ask the _why's_ of the mission because they're both fuckton loyal to Konoha and would never question their Hokage.) 

(And now that Sakumo thought about it, when their mission was done, it would possibly prevent an incoming coup d'etat for Kiri.) 

(Why would Konoha help Kiri?) 

(What's the point of sending a Konoha shinobi for the sake of Kiri?) 

It wasn't the hardest mission Sakumo or Orochimaru has ever taken but the circumstances surrounding it made it complicated.

Especially now that there's another variable added to their mission. Namely: Orochimaru's sudden interest at Hoshigaki Kisame.

* * *

"But my hair's natural," Kisame pointed out, while chewing the barbecue Sakumo gave him.

"Swallow before you talk," the Sannin said, handing the child a glass of water and running a hand through Kisame's hair, "its just a wonder that despite your mutation, you still have a natural hair atop your head. Sharks do not have hair because they are not mammals, they have tough scales to cover up their body and when I touched your arm earlier, your skin has a rubbery feel to it and you have gills on your shoulders, I believe you can survive underwater because of that characteristics. Sharks are jawed vertebrates, they are classified as _chondrichthyes_. You said earlier that your skeletal system is made up of bone and not cartilages so despite your mutation, you are still very human-like. And your sharp teeth makes you more of a carnivore, instead of an omnivore. I have seen animal mutations on a human before and yours is the most developed. You are fascinating child, Kisame."

"Wow, no one has every told me of that before. Thanks, I guess, Inu-san," Kisame replied with a sharp grin. He stayed quiet for a second before asking, "does that mean I should only eat meat?" 

"Just call me, Mizuki," the Sannin tilted his head, drawing his hands back and placing cooked meat on Kisame's plate, "you should still eat vegetables and fruits, though. You are still human and your body requires certain minerals and vitamins that meat won't provide."

Kisame stared at Orochimaru, "you're a very strange man, Mizuki-san." He bluntly stated.

"I know," said the strange man.

"Why are you here at Kiri?"

As Orochimaru repeated their cover-up reason for why they were visiting the village, Sakumo couldn't help but sweat drop at this situation.

Orochimaru and Kisame got along, very, _very_ well. Sakumo thought that Kisame would be offended when Orochimaru started asking questions about his appearance but he was pleasantly surprised when the child wasn't offended at all and he seemed to like what Orochimaru was telling him about his mutations. It got to a point that the two didn't notice that the exhibit was about to close and the sun was already gone at the sky. Meaning, they missed lunch and if possible, Sakumo wouldn't like to miss dinner too. So, he invited Kisame to join the both of them for a meal because he knew that there was no chance of separating Orochimaru and Kisame if the Sannin was still unsatisfied at his curiousity of the child. 

Sakumo, like the good husband he should be, was just listening to their conversations while cooking meat at the barbecue place Orochimaru decided they should eat at. He chewed a grilled potato and placed meat on Orochimaru and Kisame's plate. The two, still busy with their talking.

The White Fang sighed.

"You're working at the Kaguya Clan?"

Orochimaru's inquiry brought out Sakumo from his musings and he eyed Kisame as he nodded.

"Yeah," the child answered, "my mother used to work for Kirihito-sama before and after she died, Kirihito-sama made me work for them and assigned me to be his daughter's handman. Kimi-sama said she hated my face and if given a chance, she will feed me to the sharks despite my ties with them."

Sakumo furrowed his eyebrows, "that's not nice of her." And he absentmindedly thumbed the bottom of Orochimaru's lips to wipe the stray sauce the barbecue meat left in there. 

"The Kaguya are not nice, Shiro-san." Kisame started watching them with a strange look, "they are a clan of bloodthirsty and power hungry idiots and I heard yesterday from Kimi-sama that after they _cleansed_ the village from its _impurities_ — whatever that means— they will be standing on the top of the system."

Sakumo thanked whatever gods out there that he had the mind to activate few privacy seals at their table. Kisame's a very blunt and brutally honest child. He had no self-preservation whatsoever and he also didn't possess a mouth filter.

(Kisame reminded him of Kakashi when he was younger and would blurt out whatever the hell's on his mind. Thankfully, he managed to train Kakashi out of it and lessen the bluntness of his words even though sometimes, Kakashi's filters malfunctioned when he's irate and grumpy. Sakumo prayed Kisame's honesty would not backfire to him someday.)

"Impurities means something that is impure. Impure is unclean or something that is foul. Meaning, Kirihito-sama's planning to kill everyone he sees as unclean," the Snake Sannin explained for him.

The white-haired Hatake really wondered how Orochimaru's mind works and why he prioritized Kisame's confusion at the meaning of the word _impurities_.

Sakumo worriedly stared at the child, "aren't you worried that if the Clan Head accomplished his plans for the village, you'll be in the middle of it?"

Kisame took a drink and contemplated his words. He shook his head.

"Nah. To be honest," _he had so much honesty already_! "Kiri could burn for all I care. Don't get me wrong, I'm loyal to my village. This is where I grew up. But I'm not dumb, I can see that the citizens aren't happy with how the Sandaime Mizukage ran the village and Kiri's really prejudiced. The normal population do not agree with the shinobi clans' arrogance with their kekkai genkai and the clans do not like associating with the normal people. I'm not really surprised that the Kaguya are planning to kill those they see as unclean because they're a bunch of arrogant pussies with stick up their asses! And oh, I heard from Kirihito-sama that some factions are petitioning for the Mizukage to purge bloodlines. Years or months from now, Kiri will be involved in a civil war. After I graduate from the Academy, I will probably escape from this shit hole and their caste system!"

(Brain to mouth filter! Could somebody give this child that?!) 

A curse escaped Sakumo's mouth. Kiri's situation was worst than he thought. He looked at Orochimaru and saw him already staring back at him with a smile.

"Darling, what are you thinking?" Sakumo asked, a nervous smile playing in his lips. The smile on Orochimaru's lips screamed of danger and shit that he wouldn't even think of.

Instead of answering him, the Sannin tilted his head at Kisame, "say, Kisame, how would you like to be part of a plan to kill Kirihito-sama?"

Kisame's eyes widen, "where can I register?"

(Sakumo's mind was swirling with thousanda of thoughts but the most prominent one was: _'_ _what the fuck have I gotten myself in?!'_ )

(He almost missed Naruto's brand chaos.)

( _'I wonder if Kakashi's having fun with his sleepover with Naruto.'_ )

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TWO UPDATES IN A ROW BECAUSE I'M IN THE JAM, BABY! 
> 
> I don't know if this shit made sense but just imagine, their mission was like what Danzo tasked Itachi to do to stop the Uchiha's coup. The only difference was that Sakumo and Oro were ordered to assassinate a Clan Head of the Clan they have almost to zero information in a village that was already in the middle of a conflict and Itachi was ordered to finish his whole clan who he knows deeply from inside to outside. Am I making sense? I dunno, if I'm not and some of y'all are disappoint about the mission details, I'm sorry. I'm shit at writing detailed stuff. 
> 
> I really planned on writing a serious mission but then it turned into crack-ish and I couldn't help myself but choose this one. 
> 
> Thank you for the well wishes! And I know y'all miss my shitty writing! I'm sorry for not replying to the comments on the previous chapter but I promise that in this one, I will! G-MAIL'S MALFUNCTIONING ON ME AGAIN, I HATE IT! 
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down, bitch.
> 
> — Segnor


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the use of botched up seals, three-week long mission was finished in the span of a day or two with Orochimaru and Sakumo doing nothing.

Sakumo wondered when his life had slowly turned into a gag manga. 

As he stared at the grinning Kisame, blood splattering his face and his body, a sadistic glint in his eyes while a strange creature was happily purring at his side, Sakumo didn't know whether to cry or to applaud the child.

"Can you please repeat that, Kisame-kun?" Sakumo asked.

"His head exploded!"

"His head what now?" Sakumo clarified, surely he heard that wrong? 

"Exploded!" Kisame happily supplied and gestured his hands— immitating an explosion, "Kirihito-sama's head exploded and it was awesome!"

Uhm, no. He heard that right. And yeah, he didn't understand how that happened. 

"Kisame-kun, can you please explain how that happened? I think you missed a whole lot of explanation there." The White Fang massaged his temple, trying to subdue an incoming headache.

Kisame nodded and started his tale. 

* * *

Kisame knew that something was suspicious in the couple that approached him. But when they treated him for dinner, his suspicions were already gone, especially when they told him they were to assassinate the Kaguya Clan Head, Kirihito-sama, he volunteered. And to his glee, Mizuki-san agreed even when Shiro-san tried to argue at first.

"You shouldn't worry, Shiro-san," Kisame tried placating the kind man, "it's practically tradition for us that before we graduate the Academy, we should already have our first kill. It's just luck that mine's going to be a Kiri Clan Head but eh..."

He certainly didn't look placated at all and Shiro-san was about to speak when Mizuki-san finished ransacking his scroll and handed him papers. Kisame curiously looked at the paper and saw... gibberish squiggles. What's this now?

"We're not asking you to assassinate Kirihito-sama, Kisame," Mizuki plainly stated as if they were talking about the weather outside, "what I want you to do is sneakily place that seal inside Kirihito-sama's robes and we will finish the job."

"Seal? What does this do?" Kisame asked.

"If activated with a small amount of chakra, it messes chakra coils and in the span of two days, Kirihito-sama will be unable to perform any jutsu. Thus, if we were to assassinate him, it will be very hard for him to fight us." Mizuki-san explained, "so, before you stick this in Kirihito-sama, you should prickle your blood first in the paper and the seal will slowly absorb the chakra in your blood as it activates. If your blood was already in the seal, no one can unstick it."

"Cool," the blue-skinned child quipped.

"I have never heard of a seal like that," Shiro-san said and furrowed his eyebrows while looking at his husband.

"Oh, I made that," Shiro-san answered, "technically, I'm still in the process of experimentation but it will work and do its job."

"Oh, and if, only if, things won't turn out your way and you need to escape, activate these as a smokescreen and a flashbang, it will give you an ample amount of time to run for safety," Mizuki-san said and gave him ten pieces of sealing paper, five smokescreen and five for flashbang. He also gave him two of those chakra disruptors. Kisame nodded gratefully and thanked the man. 

As they bid from each other, Shiro-san telling him to meet them tomorrow at the marine exhibits to report whether he failed or succeeded with the job they gave him, Kisame excitedly skipped towards the Kaguya Clan Compound. The guards greeted him with a stink eye and Kisame ignored them because Kirihito-sama's aide told him he was summoned by the Clan Head.

"You called for me, Kirihito-sama?" Kisame greeted.

The man with short spiky white hair and pale skin looked at him, as if assessing him.

"You weren't with Kimi when she got home," Kaguya Kirihito stated. "You failed guarding her." 

Kisame gritted his teeth as he remembered Kimi-sama's words to him earlier, "I'm sorry, Kirihito-sama."

The man continued staring at him with blank hateful eyes and Kisame almost fidgeted but remembered that Shiro-san and Mizuki-san would kill this man and he didn't care if it's for him or for their own gain. He's just thankful that this snooty man would die.

"There would be a Council meeting toomorrow and I want you there with me as we discuss our plans about purging those of without a clan but has a Kekkei Genkai and what we're about to do with your kind," the man spat out.

The child just nooded in acquiescence and went to go to his room, clutching the sealing papers in his pocket.

As the sun rose, he went to Kirihito-sama's office and discreetly placed a paper inside the man's outer robes where he wouldn't see it. He was greeted by an insult by the Kaguya Clan Head and they went their ways to the Mizukage's office. The other Clan Heads were already there, even the Mizukage and they started the meeting when Kirihito-sama came.

For fifteen minutes, the discussion made Kisame's stomach churn as he listened about the plan for purging. He couldn't stop the scowl on his face when a man from the Seven Ninja Swordmen of the Mist suggested that they all should be skinned to death, he even volunteered himself to do it. Kirihito-sama agreed and so were the others. Kisame thought that Kirihito-sama's a damn bitch hypocrite, telling others that they should all kill those with bloodline but not belonging to a major shinobi clan when the Kaguya Clan were already planning for a revolt because bloodline users even those belonging of a clan were looked down by some parts of the higher caste system of Kiri. The merchants and scholars were looking down upon the 'disgusting' mutation of the Kekkei Genkai users.

Kisame ignored the discussion as it turned bloodier and bloodier from there and observed Kirihito-sama instead. He knew that the seal would not immediately took effect but he wondered if the chakra from his blood was already absorbed by the paper and it was already starting to activate. Kisame wondered if he would now if it did.

As he observed the snooty bitch, Kisame noticed that the man was starting to have red blotches (like rashes) in his pale face. The Terumi Clan Head, who's the only one arguing about the morality of their discussion, also noticed this and asked Kirihito-sama about it. The man was about to answer when they all heard a loud pop.

Kisame stared. 

All the Clan Head stared. 

Mizukage-sama was staring.

Kirihito-sama's head just exploded in a rain of blood and brain.

(What the fuck?) 

(What the actual fuck?) 

Out of all the people in the room, Kisame was the most affected by the rain of gore because he was just standing near Kirihito-sama.

He could feel some heavy slime of brain hit his face and he watched with glee as a single eye hit Mizukage-sama in the face.

Shit went down and all shinobi personnel inside the room turned to their battle instinct and formed a stance away from the exploded mess of what once was the Kaguya Clan Head. 

"What's the meaning of this?!" Mizukage-sama bellowed and this was Kisame's first time witnessing the man showed a reaction aside from his placidness— his impecable shiny black hair was a mess as bits and pieces from Kirihito-sama's head clung to it.

"Who did this?" Terumi-sama asked, looking at the remains of the Kaguya Clan Head.

Kisame knew that he would either regret this or cackle at the ingenuity of his plan but he couldn't stop himself, "I did."

As he just admitted what he did to the seasoned shinobi that surrounded him, Kisame threw a seal of flashbang and made escape. He also couldn't stop the urge to stick a seal to the unprepared Mizukage-sama's forehead. His ANBU scrambled to protect him when they got their bearings from the surprise attack but it was already too late. Kisame knew shit about Fuuinjutsu sealing but he just thanked it that bigger amount of blood means faster in absorption for Mizuki-san's seal, Kami thanked the heavens that he was already covered with the Kaguya Clan Head's blood— making it easier for him to activate his seal.

Everyone was left with ringing ears and teary eyes from the flashbang but they could all just watch from stupefaction as the Mizukage's head exploded— much like what had happened earlier to Kaguya Kirihito.

And for this time, Kisame really did make his escape. Activating and throwing all the seals Mizuki-san gave him, he ran past everyone. And as some of the seals activated, he dodge the grabby hands of the ANBU and stick those head exploding seals to them, making them scramble away from him. Kisame use the unnamed member of the Seven Swordsman as a stepping stone and jumped from the Mizukage's window. Something heavy attached to his side and Kisame ignored it in favor of his bolting out. Sounds of flashbang activating and coughing from the smokescreen made by the Clan Heads were the music to his escape.

He hoped Mizuki-san and Shiro-san were already waiting for him at the marine exhibit because they need to get out of Kirigakure. Pronto.

(Some part of his mind wondered why out of the remaining nine pieces of sealing paper, only five were activated.)

(Why didn't those four seals activated?)

* * *

"We need to get out, now," Sakumo said just as Kisame finished with his tale.

Orochimaru nodded with agreement and scooped up Kisame, and the creature attached at his side, in his arms as they vanished in a Shunshin no Jutsu— making them reappear inside their hotel room. They immediately packed their bags, to leave no evidence of their existence here, and ran the hell away from Kirigakure before hunter nins and the ANBU started hunting for them and for Kisame who they all witnesses killing a Clan Head and their Kage in cold blood.

As they reached the dock and ordered the ferryman to set out, a loud booming sound was heard.

Sakumo, Orochimaru, Kisame, the creature in Kisame's side and the ferryman, watched with varying amount of horror as Kirigakure exploded with fire and... was that _glitter_?!

"Oh, so that's what happened too those four papers," Kisame cackled.

Sakumo turned to him, "what?"

* * *

To clarify things, Orochimaru was a decent seal master. He wasn't at the level of Kushina, Minato nor Jiraiya but he sure knows his way around a seal and he fixed his lack of knowledge in sealing by experimenting. What was a chakra disruptor that turned into a head exploding seal was of his own making— even the smokescreen and the flashbang. But what he didn't know was that as he finished packing his scrolls, Naruto, the sunshine child, snuck some sealing papers in his scrolls— four pieces of paper that he personally made because even though Kurama argued that this may sabotaged Orochimaru's mission because he knows shit about Fuuinjutsu, Naruto was in a level of worry and thickheadedness that he wouldn't be placated by the Kyuubi.

Why, might you ask, the glitters?

The answer for that was simple, Orochimaru bought ink with glitters for Naruto because the Sannin noticed that his child enjoyed writing with one. And yes, this was the ink that Naruto used to write for his seals— making the explosion unknowingly keyed to the glitters.

But how, might you ask again, did Naruto managed to make a seal that even with just four pieces of it managed to bomb Kirigakure to its core when he's a dum-dum at sealing?

The answer for that lies with Jiraiya, the future-past one.

When Jiraiya and Naruto was out of Konoha, resting at Tanzaku Gai before they start their three-year-long training, Naruto asked Jiraiya if he could learn the Hiraishin seal. Jiraiya agreed of course because he thought that the Hiraishin was Naruto's legacy even if he didn't know that the Yondaime was his father yet, and tried teaching the Jinchuriki the basis of this seal.

After they were finished, Jiraiya completely giving up with Naruto because the blond was doing the complete opposite of what he's teaching, Naruto activated his seal even with the Toad Sannin's disgrunted yell and _voila_ — the entirety of Tanzaku Gai was then seen next to Yugakure, making the Vacation Capital and Gambling Capital of the Elemental Nations newly neighbors with each other.

From this say forward, Jiraiya banned Naruto from learning a seal because he knew that the blond's sealing techniques were _lethal_ and possibly _world-ending_.

Naruto forgot of this accident because after his seal transferred Tanzaku Gai near Yugakure, Jiraiya ordered him to control his Kyuubi chakra and this was when things went to a higher shit than they already were— he transformed into the six tails, beat the crap out of Jiraiya and after he calmed down, he was in a two-week coma, making him forget all the things that happened hours before and when he was in his transformation.

* * *

(Was this mission the reason why Sakumo ended his life?) 

(No, it wasn't.)

(But in the original timeline, _'The Mission that According to Rumors was the Flame of the Third Shinobi War'_ was sanctioned by Danzo after Sakumo and his team assassinated Kaguya Kirihito, making Danzo and the Sandaime Mizukage's partnership start with the success of it. _That Mission_ was payed by the Mizukage himself after the warhawk earned his trust by finishing his orders to assassinate the Clan Head of the Kaguya Clan in an attempt to stop their planned coup and he then again gave a paid mission to Danzo that would be the reason for Sakumo's suicide.)

(Would there be a chance to know what exactly happened on _That Mission_?)

(No.)

(Let us all just be happy that with the Mizukage dead, there would be no reason for Sakumo to die this time.)

Sakumo watched Orochimaru as he fiddled with his purple scarf, his mind remembering that this scarf was owned by Naruto and be wondered how was Kakashi and Naruto doing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOT Y'ALL SHIPPING SAKU/ORO, AND FOR THAT, I SHIP THEM TOO! 
> 
> Yep, the mission's already finished because some of y'all are missing the kids. If someone's wondering how Kisame managed to escape even when surrounded by a bunch of seasoned shinobi, well, this is a crack fic and everything's possible. 
> 
> I know nuthin about sealing even when I tried understanding it. I'm sorry if some of you wanted an action scene but I really couldn't write one. I tried, okay? I tried. 
> 
> I read all the comments for the last chapter and I wasn't able to reply but for that reader who called me 'baby', thank you. You just made me realize that I'm single. (╭☞•́⍛•̀)╭☞
> 
> Can some of y'all please suggest a crossover fic that's worth to read? Either it's here in AO3 of in FF.net and I wouldn't care if it's not a Naruto fic either. Just please, I need to read some good crossover fic. 
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down, bitch.
> 
> — Segnor


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naruto + Crankiness + Boredom = Not really a great combination.

_Naruto woke up and chose chaos._

It was Saturday today and it has been exactly seven days since his Tou-san and Sakumo-shiro left the village for the mission and he was deeply wishing that they were alright. He admitted in his five-year-old body with his strange childish urges, he has been feeling cranky because he's starrting to miss his father. He gravely wanted to cuddle with his Tou-san's pleasantly cold body and he missed getting his head patted. Kushina-nee was an adept cook but he was longing for his father's meal and the warmth that they shared every night that Naruto decided to sleep with him. _Yeppers_ , he's feeling cranky and he didn't like it one bit.

It was Saturday today and Tiny-sensei wasn't with him right now. He's with Minato (how odd was it to call him in that way) doing some training and mission for the day. Naruto wouldn't intrude upon those two because he knew how important training was for Kakashi at this age. And he's quite thankful that Kakashi has been keeping him company for the past week, so, no, he would not mess with Kakashi and his sensei's bonding right now.

It was Saturday and Kushina-nee was sent on a mission by Hokage-jiji and she wouldn't be home until later this evening.

It was Saturday and Naruto was alone— feeling cranky and he was so damn bored!

He wanted to spend his time with Gai-chan (yes, he's calling him that because Gai called him Naru-chan even though he didn't know why he would address him like that but he did not question it because in his eyes, Gai is a cool person so that means his decisions were also cool) but he couldn't find him anywhere. And if what he thought earlier was right, maybe Gai-chan was running around the village and doing those challenges he enjoyed on doing.

He was kami-damned bored!

And because he's Naruto, he needed to find a way to _alleviate_ (whatever that might mean, he once heard Hokage-jiji used that and he also wanted tk use it because it sounded smart) that boredom!

**'I really won't like how this will turn out, kit,'** Kurama groused.

_'Just watch, Kurama, this day will be awesome!'_ Naruto cheered and ran off to start his chaos.

* * *

It was Saturday and Fugaku knew that this day would end with a disaster. 

Compared to the other member of the Uchiha Clan, he was not that religious. He also wasn't superstitious. But when he was woken up by the cawing of the murder of crow by his windowsill, he remembered that he was once warned by the Elders when he was a child that crows and ravens were a sign if bad luck. Fugaku ignored it, because there were lots of crows in the Fire Nation and in Konoha, and started his day.

When he got out of the Uchiha District and made his way to the Police station, he couldn't help but notice that there was an abundance of black cats littering the road. Again, he ignored that sign of bad luck.

He entered the station and saw a child eating a bowl of rice (why he's eating inside the police station, Fugaku had no clue) and the child stick his chopsticks vertically atop his rice. _That_ was also a sign for bad luck.

But _again_ , Fugaku ignored it because he didn't believe in such things. 

He started doing his duties and he completed all of them in record time. It was noon when he finished all of them and so, he decided that he needed to award himself with a good meal.

Also a sign of bad luck for the day was when he arrived at his favorite restaurant, that darned stuck up Hyuuga Hiashi was sitting primly at his usual place.

(This was a very unlucky day for him.) 

And because he was an Uchiha, he never learned how to back down, so, he approached the Hyuuga with the intention of shooing him away from his usual spot.

(Nobody ever denied that Uchiha Fugaku was a petty bastard.)

"Hyuuga," the Uchiha said as he approached his nemesis and sat in the seat adjacent him without an invitation. "This is my spot."

"Oh?" The stuck up asked, demurely raising an eyebrow at Fugaku and placing his tea back on the table, "surely your eyes can see that I'm currently occupying it. And had you no manners? I didn't give you an invitation to seat in front of me."

"I have manners, yes. But for a Hyuuga, I don't have to spare you with one," Fugaku replied.

He could see Hiashi's eyebrows twitching as a sign of irritation and Fugaku felt glee that he was the one that had caused that.

"How _barbaric_ ," murmured by the Hyuuga, "I guess I'm not really surprised that you don't have the decency to spare manners on public places. Insulting." 

Fugaku smirked _rather childishly_ , "please be insulted and get out of my spot."

A staring contest ensued between the possessor of two of the most powerdul dojutsu users inside Konoha. Silence embraced them as two teenagers didn't back down from the sudden competition of who would prevail and come up on top of the contest of who could survive using a pair of eyes with next to no moistute at all.

But it was broken by a fascinated-sounding voice.

"So, you two are rivals, dattebayo."

Both Fugaku and Hiashi whipped their heads so fast at the direction of that voice that it was a surprise none of them received whiplash from it and they were greeted by two wide blue sparkling eyes and a large foxxy grin.

(Oh no.)

( _An Uzumaki_.)

(The _blond_ one at that.) 

(Fugaku may not be superstitious but he knew that this was a _definite_ sign of bad luck.)

* * *

If you would ask Hiashi how he was in this situation right now, he wouldn't be able to answer it. Not only did he disliked his current position, he also couldn't believe that a five-year-old child manage to rile him up that he was left with no choice but to prove the child wrong.

"We are not rivals," Hiashi insisted for maybe the sixth time that hour but also for the sixth time, he was ignored.

The whiskered Uzumaki tilted his head— Hiashi would _deny to death_ that he found that action rather adorable— and asked, "if you two are rivals, who's stronger?"

"I am."

Hiashi and Fugaku stared at each other at their same responses. He felt irritation bubbling in his stomach at the rather disbelieving look the Uchiha threw at him. 

"You are? Surely you jest," the pompous bastard scoff.

Hiashi tried to maintain his composure, "I am stronger than you, Uchiha. Remember, I was the top student at the Academy?"

At the reminder of that event, Hiashi saw Fugaku gritting his teeth. Yes, the arrogant arse was still bitter about it and Hiashi would gladly rub it in his face.

"But I am stronger now," he tried to reason but before the Uchiha continued out with that, the Uzumaki intervened.

"I know! Why don't you two show me ninjutsu tricks! Then, we'll know who's stronger, 'ttebayo!"

Hiashi prided himself as a very composed and calm man. He wasn't childish. He's mature. And he's cynical. He didn't know why but something in the blond Uzumaki child's words made him accept his offer and now— now, they're in Training Ground 44 because the child told them that he would determine who's stronger between him and the Uchiha base on the larger scale of destruction they could inflict inside the Forest of Death.

He knew that it was beyond idiotic, challenging an Uchiha in ninjutsu when most of the Hyuuga Clan techniques revolved around taijutsu, but he sure won't back down just because he knew that he may not have the probability of winning. Besides, it's not like he didn't know destructive ninjutsy techniques that he could use between this spur of the moment contest. Let that Uchiha eat ashes if he fought his fire with fire.

"Contestants, to your places," the child who managed to rile both Hiashi and Fugaku said in a serious voice and both contestants turned back from each other, hands ready, "remember, use your strongest ninjutsu trick, 'ttebayo! The winner will be proclaimed the strongest between you two rivals and there would ba a consolation of ramen for the loser... Ready, set, _fire_!"

And _fire_ they both released. 

(Hiashi didn't really know but from that point on, this day would turn into something they would never forget.) 

(And it was all because of Uzumaki Naruto. An Uzumaki that he couldn't believe was way _worse_ than Kushina.) 

* * *

Sakumo, Orochimaru and Kisame stopped in their tracks at the image that they were greeted by. 

"Are Konoha forest always burning?" Kisame curiosly asked.

Orochimaru shook his head, "no." 

Sakumo didn't know the details yet, but his instinct yelled at him that this was a deed done by Orochimaru's son.

(Sakumo and Kakashi always knew that there would come a time when Naruto would burn Konoha.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU FOR ALL THE RECOMMENDATIONS. I've read some of the fics y'all recommended and it was good, I completely forgot that I needed to update as a Christmas gift even though this was a short one. Some works I've already had a subscription to. 
> 
> Currently, I'm back on my Vinland Saga addiction. I swear, FMAB and Vinland Saga are my top two favorite manga. I started reading Vinland Saga way back 2016 and it has become my top manga. I am deeply fascinated with Norse Myth and that manga gave me all the viking action that I've been missing for all my life. Seriously, y'all should read the manga or watch the anime— the character development and plot was astounding and jaw dropping. JUST SHARING.
> 
> I appreciate all the kudos, comments and bookmarks this fic received for the last chapter and I love y'all so much.
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down, bitch, and advance happy Christmas. 
> 
> — Segnor


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Konoha took the meaning of the Will of Fire literally, Hashirama-sama couldn't be more prouder for his village.

Hiruzen was having a massive headache and no one in Elemental Nations could compare to the pounding in his head now. He took off the Hokage hat and placed in atop his table. He stared at his hat and for the first time ever, regretted that his sensei passed him this position. He knew that even the Nidaime, his Tobirama-sensei, would just give up completely and live a secluded life up in the mountains if he's facing Hiruzen's current situation.

"Kaguya Kirihito's head did what now?" Hiruzen asked.

"It exploded," Hatake Sakumo, one of Hiruzen's outstanding Jounin and Konoha's White Fang, answered lightly while smiling as if what he said amounts to nothing. 

"The Sandaime Mizukage's head did what now?"

"It exploded," Orochimaru, Hiruzen's brightest student and the Snake Sannin, answered while cleaning his nails with a sharp kunai as if he would want to be with his son more than reporting what happened at their misison to their Kage.

"And Kirigakure did what now?"

"It exploded with glitters!" Hoshigaki Kisame, a Kiri Academy student and Orochimaru's latest kidnapped child, cheerfully answered while ignoring the purring creature in his back.

Hiruzen felt his headache worsen and tried to think of a way to salvage this situation. If Kiri found out the culprit responsible for the recent assassination of one of their village Clan Head and the Sandaime Mizukage plus the destruction of their village capital. Hiruzen has been Hokage for years and he didn't know whether to classify this mission as a strange success or a brilliant failure.

The Sandaime Hokage wondered when everything turned like this. Konohagakure used to make sense. The world was simple back then. But ever since a whiskered Uzumaki caught his student's attention, the logic of the world Hiruzen knew was turning upside down. _And Naruto_... Hiruzen sighed. Just thinking of Naruto was enough of an addition too his headache.

He was trying to think of a solution to this problem because he would not risk war for this mission when Naruto's laughter rang through Hiruzen's mind.

(From now onwards, the word _'dattebayo'_ would fuel his nightmares for a few nights.)

"Atleast, Kiri will not suspect anything from our village," Hiruzen said when he just realized something, "now that Training Ground 44's covered with glitter and fire, they will assume that the culprit that destroyed their village and ours was the same."

"Huh? Glitters?" Hoshigaki Kisame tilted his head in confusion as if the word glitter was the only one that caught his attention.

Was it already too late to ban glitter in the village?

"Speaking of that incident, Hokage-sama. Why is our forest burning?" Sakumo asked.

"About that," Hiruzen heaved a sigh before starting his tale.

* * *

_The flashiest flashback ever... Hours before Sakumo and Orochimaru's arrival at the village._

Naruto stared with wide eyes of fascination at the fire that's now covering the surrounding forest.

"It's so pretty!" The Uzumaki murmured with an odd glint in his wide blue eyes and a large grin in his mouth that if Naruto wasn't the one wearing that smile, you would think that a person wearing his grin was psychotic and a mass murderer.

**'Kit, don't tell me you're a pyromaniac?'** Kurama asked.

_'Am not, 'ttebayo.'_ The Uzumaki denied, ignoring Fugaku and Hiashi in the background who were both panicking and running around like a headless chicken. Both Chuunin couldn't think of a technique that has water as its main element and they both started cursing the Will of Fire even though it was completely unrelated to this situation. 

**'You are worse than that Uchiha brat.'**

_'You take that back, Kurama!'_ Naruto mentally yelled, deeply offended, _'I am nothing like Sasuke-teme when it comes to burning something.'_

Kurama sighed, aggravated, **'can you think of an incident where the Uchiha brat burned something this large of a scale?'**

Naruto tried thinking, he really did— and when he came up with nothing, a scandalized gasp escaped his lips, _'no way!'_

**'Yes way, just accept it, you're worst than the Uchiha brat when it comes to fire. And he's the one with fire as an elemental affinity,'** Kurama laughed as if he won the lottery when all he did was won an argument against Naruto.

_'It's not even my fault, dattebayo! Fugaku and Hiashi were the one who used Katon!'_ Naruto yelled again but Kurama ignored him in favor of laughing at his face.

Naruto clicked his tongue, "I'm not a pyromaniac, Kurama. You'll see."

And the Uzumaki pulled out seals of his making from his pockets.

**'Oh no, not that! You know you suck at sealing and you don't even know what your seals will do!'** Kurama stopped laughing and tried making the Uzumaki child to see reasoning. He really wished the time when he was the one being stopped and cursed this ~~adorable~~ child for making him the rational one.

_'Watch me, Kurama! With my new invention, I would stop this fire!'_ And just like how Ash threw his Poke Balls, Naruto threw his seals and watched as it reached the fire. _And oh,_ look at that the fire grew bigger. Who knew that would happen? 

Ooh! 

_Glitters!_

"What did you do?!" Hiashi yelled and Naruto gave himself an award because he managed to ruffle the Hyuuga's feathers.

"I don't know! I thought that would stop the fire, dattebayo!" Naruto yelled back and he released an 'oomf' sound when Fugaku hauled him like a sack of potatoes.

"We need to get out of here before the fire consumes us!" The Uchiha yelled and skedaddled the hell out of the Forest of Death.

When they got out of Training Ground 44, the trio were greeted by various shinobi of different ranks— tag-teaming and trying to subdue the fire with water techniques.

"What happened?" The normally laid back Nara Shikaku asked them, watching Jounins use their Suiton techniques and when it didn't work, Genins and Chuunins were assigned to gather pails of water to manually put the fire out.

"It was a battle between rivals!" Naruto cheerfully answered, still hanging from Fugaku's back.

Shikaku stared back at Naruto with scrutinizing eyes and when the blond Uzumaki just gave him a gleeful grin and a scrunch of his nose, the Nara shrugged his shoulders. 

"Troublesome." Was Shikaku's only comment and proceeded to lay down on the ground, ignoring the background of chaos.

Hours after that incident, Naruto was sitting with Fugaku and Hiashi at the Uchiha Police station, the Uchiha head just finished reprimanding them when the Hokage arrived at the station. 

"Jiji!" Naruto greeted and pounced at the Hokage.

Everyone at the vicinity of the strange scene stilled at the Uzumaki's actions and when they saw that the Hokage just ruffled the child's hair and endured Naruto's ways of showing affection, they all released a breath that they weren't aware they were all holding.

"Naruto," the Hokage's eyes crinkled when he smiled indulgingly at the child, "what you did today was reckless."

"Technically, it wasn't my fault. Hiashi and Fugaku were the one who used fire techniques, 'ttebayo," Naruto said without thinking about how his words would be perceived, completely throwing the Uchiha and Hyuuga heirs under the bus.

"Is that so?" Hokage-jiji asked and looked back at the two heirs behind Naruto who both cringed at the look that the Sandaime gave them. "But I heard that you used a Fuuinjutsu seal to fuel the fire."

"Uh, yeah. Hehe, I kinda did, 'ttebayo," and the child rubbed the back of his neck while trying to smile apologetically.

"Can I see what those seals are?"

"Uhn!" And Naruto handed the extra seals in his pocket to his Hokage-jiji. The Sandaime examined the papers and Naruto watched as the older man raised an eyebrow at him.

"Where did you get this?"

"I made them!" Naruto proudly declared, "I'm a Fuuinjutsu genius, Jiji!"

_'You are not,'_ Kurama disagreed but Naruto chose to ignore the fox.

"Really now?" The Sandaime asked with a tone of surprise in his voice, "and where did you learn to do this? Do you even know what this seal can do?"

"I'm self-taught," and again, Naruto ignored Kurama's comments in his head in favor of addressing his Jiji and showing him how awesome he is. "And the seals are like a surprise box, you won't know what you will get. _It's exciting_ , dattebayo!"

Naruto was left confused when the Sandaime rubbed his temples and the shinobi surrounding them was looking at him with wide horrified eyes.

_'Kurama, did I do something?!'_ Naruto asked with distress.

**'I don't know, kit, why don't you figure it out for yourself,'** the magnanimous Kyuubi no Youko just gave up. Lately, he noticed that Naruto's childish urges were getting too strong... Or maybe this was just Naruto being Naruto, being an airhead when the situation needed him to read the atmosphere. Sometimes, Naruto could be the most empathetic and attentive one but most of the times, he's just like _this_. It's traumatizing. 

"And can I ask what you used to make these? This is not a sealing paper," Hokage-jiji said and flapped Naruto's seals in the air.

"You need sealing paper to make seals?!" The whiskered child exclaimed with surprise, "all this time, I'm using ordinary paper! And when I ran out of white paper, I used colored one and I think it suits me more, dattebayo! You see, Jiji, orange is my favorite color that's why I wrote those squiggles in an orange colored paper and do you see the lines were a bit shiny? That's because I used the ink Tou-san bought me. _Glitter makes everything fancy!_ "

The silence that greeted his explanations left him feeling confused again. He heard a whimper somewhere and when he swiveled his head back to look at the direction of the voice in the peanut gallery, he saw an older Uchiha looking at him as if he has a Bijuu inside him. Oh wait— he has one! 

(Kurama rolled his eyes so hard at his stupid joke.) 

"This is pure insanity," coming from an Uchiha, a Clan that produces insane shinobi throughout the genetration™, that's saying something about how Naruto's head works.

_End of the flashiest flashback ever.._. 

* * *

Orochimaru's first sight of his son after a week away from the village was a bit out of the ordinary.

Naruto was comfortably sitting at a chair beside Uchiha Fugaku and Hyuuga Hiashi behind the prison bars of Uchiha Police station.

"Uzumaki, you're getting out. Orochimaru-sama bailed for you!" An Uchiha officer called outside the prison cell and before Orochimaru knew it, a child was barreling towards him.

The Snake Sannin spread his arms and caught the blond when the latter pounced at him. He heaved a deep sigh and inhaled the scent of his son. He smelled of soot and a bit of sweat but the scent that Orochimaru associated for the whiskered Uzumaki was still there and it brought comfort to the Sannin. He reveled at the warmth that Naruto excluded and would forever enjoy the feeling of his embrace when the child turned his head up to look at him.

_"Welcome back, Tou-san!"_

Orochimaru stared at his son and a sincere smile slipped on his lips, _"I'm back."_

He heard someone sniffled at the background and Orochimaru mentally noted that he would make sure that Naruto took a bath after they got home so that he wouldn't get the man's flu.

(Said man with a flu sniffled again and tried to hide his tears at the touching scene he just saw, the Uchiha officer ignored his Clan heir staring at him like he just declared his passionate love for a Hyuuga and instead, he quietly said to himself as he watched the normally aloof Sannin embrace his child, "this is too pure.")

"Why are you inside the prison?" Orochimaru curiously asked the child in his arms.

"Oh! Hokage-jiji didn't know what punishment he should give us for burning the Forest of Death when he found out that technically, there really was no damage done by the fire because of my seals! Tou-san, did you know that my seals could make the fire burn forever, dattebayo, without actually burning what its touching?!" Excitement was shining at Naruto's eyes at this prospect, "so, for some legal reasons that I wasn't listening to, Jiji still needed to punish us. And that's why I suggested that he should lock us up in jail! I have never been inside a jail before and it was so fun, 'ttebayo!" 

Orochimaru's mind suddenly lapsed when he heard how Naruto's seals worked and he felt something warm in his chest again. He was burning up with pride at how smart his son was.

"That's great," Orochimaru hummed and stood up, Naruto still in his arms and he tucked the child's head under his chin, "I need to go back to Sarutobi-sensei because we're still not finished discussing our report for the mission. What do you want to eat later?"

"Ramen!" Was the automatic response.

Orochimaru and his sunshine child got out of the prison cells, leaving the Hyuuga and Uchiha heirs with each other. 

"So..." The Uchiha officer, who just finished crying, addressed the two teens still behind the prison bars, "no one to bail you two out?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am happy to share that my writer's block when it comes to my original works is now gone! I'm finally able to write again with my OG works without the amount of tears that I dedicated everytime I pushed myself writing when there's really nothing to push. I know that my OG works aren't garnering attention in Wattpad because I don't usually use the formula others write with but just the thought that I can continue again was enough to send me to tears. 
> 
> This chapter is unedited, sorry, tee hee. 
> 
> Thank you for the appreciation my fics received and I'm sorry because I wasn't able to reply to all the comments, it's just, I'm too overwhelmed with them because they're too many and I don't know how to answer your comments aside from thanking you for reading this and for the non-stop support. Thank you all! Just thank you °˖ ✧◝ (* ⁰ ▿⁰ ) ◜✧ ˖°
> 
> I hope everyone will have a happy new year! 2021, treat us better please! And mabuhay! 
> 
> Drink moderately, bitch. 
> 
> — Segnor


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kisame's OTP. Family dinner. Naruto could adopt whoever the hell he wanted to adopt. And Sakumo's inner gushing.

Sakumo, Kakashi, Kisame with his pet and Minato (who Kakashi forced to join them) were all walking towards Orochimaru's house because the Sannin invited them for their dinner to have a small celebration for their somewhat successful mission. Even the Sandaime was invited but he declined when Orochimaru told him that _'_ _yes, Naruto would also be with them because he's my son and he was the one to ask me to invite you all for dinner so it's not a surprise that he'd be there, Sarutobi-sensei_. _Why are you even asking me about that?'_

And for the past five minutes, Kisame wouldn't stop teasing him even when he first met Kakashi who stared at him like when he stared at Naruto when he first met the whiskered Uzumaki. When Kakashi called Naruto as _'pest'_. 

"Is this a strange Konoha ritual? Newly wedded couple killing a clan head?" Kisame curiosly asked and smiled, "it's sweet."

Sakumo didn't know if Kisame was listening to the mission report earlier considering that he was inside the Sandaime's office when they were talking about it or he was just busy petting the creature attached at his back who may or may not be the famous Kiri's sword, Samehada. 

"Uhm, Kisame-kun, were not married. That's just our cover up for the mission. And you shouldn't discuss what happened on that mission. It's classified," Sakumo tried explaining, feeling a bit flustered for reasons he couldn't exactly pinpoint on. Kakashi was staring at him with a dubious expression as if he could perfectly hear what's inside his mind. 

"Whaaa?" The blue-skinned child narrowed his eyes at him. "But you look perfect together. I ship it. My OTP. 

Ship what now? Ow tee pee? What? 

"Kisame-kun, please stop."

The child just laughed at Sakumo as the latter just sighed in exasperation.

"When did you and Orochimaru-sama got married, Sakumo-san? Why weren't we invited?" Namikaze Minato, the famed prodigy and Kakashi's Jounin instructor, curiously asked.

Sakumo wondered how Minato was this innocent when Jiraiya was his teacher. It was impossible and a bit baffling as to how that happened.

"They're not," Kakashi answered in his stead and Sakumo heard a small mumble of 'idiot' made by his child and Sakumo's eyes widened because he couldn't believe that Kakashi, his rule-abiding son, would say something like that to his teacher.

(What had happened to Kakashi since the week he has been gone for his mission?)

Before Sakumo got to ask, the group arrived outside the Snake Sannin's compound and his son was waiting outside for them. Naruto greeted them all with a blinding light and Kisame, who wasn't used to the child's brilliance, rubbed his eyes.

"Tou-san is still cooking and he told me to let you all—" Naruto didn't finish his words as his eyes landed on Kisame, specifically the creature at his back, an issue that no one bothered to address yet because this day was in all ways chaotic and even the Sandaime gave up on trying to solve all issues in it. "Whoa! You have a cool pet, dattebayo! Can I pet him?!"

"Of course!" Kisame gleefully replied and detached the huge ass sword that was the size of his body from his back and gave it to Naruto.

The blond child happily accepted the sword and started petting it as if it was not a weapon that shreds and shaves skin of an unfortunate shinobi that met the end of it in a battlefield. Sakumo once saw Samehada in action with its _past owner_ and it wasn't a pretty sight.

He's seriously asking himself when he started getting desensitized to all the craziness in his surrounding that he wasn't even surprised when the sword purred at Naruto's hands and Kisame joined him with the petting. 

"Pyun~ Pyun~" the sword purred rather _cutely_. 

The group all stopped what they were doing to stare at the sword with various expression of shock and in Sakumo's state— _resignation_. A whole minute passed and there was a united decision that they weren't going to think about that today. They all smiled at each other and entered the compound like nothing out of the ordinary happened. Naruto welcomed them inside the house and led them towards the dining hall where they saw Orochimaru arranging the table.

"Thank you for inviting us for dinner, Orochimaru-san," Sakumo said in a bit of a formal voice and the Sannin gave him a nod.

"Naruto insisted, he told me that he missed us and wanted to have dinner with all of you and I am happy to grant him his wishes," the man replied and gestured them all to sit down. Minato also thanked the man and Orochimaru graciously accepted it and offered him to try his ramen.

They all sat down and Sakumo watched as Naruto fussed Minato to have a taste of what his father cooked. Minato did as what Naruto asked of him and as he took his first bite, his eyes widened with shock. 

"I told you he can cook the best ramen, 'ttebayo!" Naruto said in a smug voice. The two blonds talked for a bit and Sakumo' s attention wasn't with them as he noticed Orochimaru placing eggplants at Kakashi's bowl.

"Thank you, Oro-san," Kakashi said, his mask already lowered as he started eating.

"Naruto told me that you loved them so I cooked them for you," Orochimaru said with a small soft smile that rang alarm bells at Sakumo's mind and _oh no_.

Oh no.

Oh no, no, no.

_Sakumo's screwed_.

* * *

Kisame stand by his point that Konoha nins were weird as heck. No one even batted an eye with his appearance and no one even questioned why Mizuki-san, who was Konoha's Snake Sannin, and Shiro-san, Konoha's White Fang, kidnapped him and took him home. And apparently, Mizuki— Oro-san's son was the one responsible why Konoha's forest was eternally burning _with glitters_.

"Are you going to stay with us, Kisame-chan?" Naru-kun, a very strange child, asked while slurping his ramen.

Kisame gave his new pet, Naru-kun called him Same-chan (so, he would now be dubbed as Same-chan), a piece of carrot as he answered, "I'm not really sure. I just let Oro-san and Saku-san kidnapped me so I'll let them decide."

"You kidnapped him?" Kashi-kun asked his father but Saku-san didn't answer because he was busy staring at Oro-san wearing a strange expression in his face that Kisame couldn't read.

"We did not kidnap him, Kakashi," Oro-san answered when Saku-san didn't, he smiled indulgingly at them and the White Fang released a sound that no one in the table could understand— aside from Kashi-kun who glared at his father— so they all ignored him in favor of listening to the Sannin and the latter looked at Kisame, "what we did was to forcibly adopt you without your knowledge."

Kisame's eyes widened in surprise, "you... adopted me?"

The Sannin nodded, "yes. I also told Sarutobi-sensei about it and he will process the papers for me to legally adopt you."

"I'll have a new brother?!" Naru-kun yelled and Kisame still couldn't believe what's happening right now.

Oro-san's adopting him! Someone... someone wanted him.

_Oro-san wanted Kisame_.

Kisame marveled at that fact and a smile crept up his lips as Same-chan purred at him and he gave him another piece of carrot.

Konoha nins are weird for wanting someone like him to as a son. 

(And he's going to have a brother too!)

"What do you mean _'new_ ', Naruto-kun?" The bigger blond who seriously looked like Naru-kun's biological brother asked. Are they related? 

"Oh, I adopted Tiny-sensei and you, Minato-nii, to be my brother, 'ttebayo. You two didn't know it but I gave Hokage-jiji a petition for your adoption, I dunno if he'll accept it but you can't refuse," Naru-kun explained.

"That's not how that works," Mina-kun weakly protested that fell on deaf ears when Naru-kun started giving them lecture about ramen and its greatness.

Kisame listened with great attention at his _new brother._

* * *

Sakumo was fucked.

He knew that he was fucked but he couldn't stop thinking about it especially as he joined the man at clearing the table while the children and Minato were at the living room, petting Samehada or Same-chan as what Naruto started calling the sword.

"The dinner was great, Orochimaru-san," Sakumo started, helping the man in his kitchen.

"I'm glad you liked it," the Sannin tilted his head at him, "and I think we're past formalities now, Sakumo. Kisame even insisted at dinner that we're a married couple. So, I believe that you should stop addressing me with _'-san'._ " And there was a teasing glint in his eyes.

_Sakumo stammered_.

Konoha's White Fang stammered like a teenager.

He's so fucked and he couldn't even regret what he's feeling right now when the other man laughed lightly at his reaction. 

"He... He was just kidding, I don't think someone will want to marry me at this point," Sakumo replied and he didn't know why he even said that. Why? Just why? "I mean... I'm busy with being a shinobi and it's hard to find someone that will marry a man who already has a child. Kakashi's more important to me than marriage." 

"You are an attractive man and a kind father, Sakumo, I admire that about you. And I personally think that because of your admirable characteristics, everyone wants to marry a man like you." 

"Even you?" Sakumo really didn't know where that came from and why he's asking that.

Something's seriously wrong with him.

Golden eyes met dark stormy greys, "even me." 

Sakumo didn't know that he would still feel this certain feeling at his age and if Jiraiya, his longtime friend, could hear what he's thinking right now, the man would endlessly tease him and laugh at his face. 

This was all Orochimaru's fault. Him and that damn smile of his that softly stayed in his lips as he finished laughing but was still looking at Sakumo with a soft expression. Sakumo knew in himself that when he first met the man, he already thought that he was pretty even with his aloof expression but this, _this_! Orochimaru freely expressing his emotions at Sakumo was a sight to behold. 

(The White Fang would forever hide the fact that somewhere at the back of his mind, he squealed _manly_ when the Sannin told him that he wanted to marry him.) 

(And he called him attractive!) 

(Is this what children call nowadays as gay awakening?) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smol and short update, I know. I feel like this chapter's a bit weak compared to my other chapters but meh, my funny bone's not always with me so I'm sorry for that. But I'm starting to build up Kisame's OTP. I dunno if this was a bit fast but I've been leaving hints about Saku/Oro on the past chapters and to those who doesn't like that shipping, don't worry, Sakumo will not act on his feelings. Or will he? At this point, I just love tormenting Sakumo. 
> 
> Just sharing, I've been getting quite addicted at good Self-insert stories. 
> 
> Thank you for all the hits, kudos, bookmarks and comments! All the support and kind words gave me a reason to continue writing（ ○ ゜ ε ＾ ○ ）
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down.
> 
> — Segnor


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the Hyper-thingy again!

Naruto was panicking. 

Correction, Naruto and Kisame were panicking. 

(In fact, if Samehada was listening to their conversation, they would panic, too. But alas, the strange pet-sword was busy munching a stalk of asparagus as a midday snack.)

Naruto couldn't believe that he forgot about _this_. He couldn't forgive himself that out of all the things that he could've forgotten, _this_ was what he forgot!

He couldn't hold back the sniffle that escaped him and his father immediately placed him on his lap, trying to comfort the upset child. 

"I am alright, _hatchlings_ ," Orochimaru comforted both his adopted children, beckoning Kisame to sit next to him and patted the child's head. "It's not as serious as it sounds."

"But it's a heart condition! It's that _Hypertror_... _Hyper-thingy_! And Sakumo-shiro said that it causes death! What if... What if you'll—"

The blond Uzumaki could not finish his sentence and clamped his mouth shut— afraid that if he said it, it would eventually come true.

**'You are being dramatic, kit,'** Kurama groused, nap interrupted at his Jinchuriki's drama, **'if he told you that it's not serious, it's probably not.'**

Naruto refused to believe Kurama. He was pretty sure that his Tou-san was dialing down the pain he's experiencing with his heart because he knew that's what sick people do. They didn't like others pitying them and seeing them in a vulnerable state by their love ones.

It's been days since Kisame-chan and Same-chan legally joined their household (Naruto deleted the fact in his mind that technically, Orochimaru kidnapped Kisame) and it has been great. He met older-Kisame multiple times in the future-past before and he never really got to know the man's character but this child version of him got swimmingly well with Naruto. Kisame was honest to a degree (almost rivaling Tiny-sensei's bluntness), always listens to Naruto's rant about everything and nothing at all, tells him interesting tales about Kirigakure and fishes in general, fun to cuddle with and he promised to Naruto that if something happened to him on his watch, he would murder everyone and himself. It's kinda sweet that he would willingly commit bloodshed on Naruto's sake (Kurama grumbled that he's becoming a little bit like Shukaku and that's a seriously no-no thing) even if it's a bit uncomfortable because he liked some of the people here at Konoha and seriously?

_Who_ would try to hurt Gai-chan?

The tinier version of Bushier Brows-sensei was the most pure child that Naruto has the YOUTHFULLNESS! to bond with. And he's certain that if Kisame-chan and Gai-chan met, they would get along well. Especially because they both liked green.

(Kisame liked green, who knew? Certainly not Naruto and Kurama.)

(Kurama was a bit afraid that Gai would influence Kisame to start wearing a green spandex and swore that if the blue skinned child did, he would dye his fur in fuchsia pink. And Naruto would help him with that. He'd add glitters to it to make Kurama look fancier.)

So, with the sudden addition of Kisame-chan and Same-chan to their lives, Naruto forgot about the fact that his Tou-san was _terminally ill_ and in need of an _immediate cure_.

Kisame and Naruto were helping him tend the garden when he noticed the Snake Sannin looking at them while holding a hand to his chest when something just _clicked_. 

The man has a heart disease. Heart condition? Naruto didn't know what _Hyper-thingy_ really was because he never got to fully understand the medical jargons on the medical book he read but the symptoms of _Hyper-thingy_ matches with his Tou-san. And it's been a few weeks since Naruto diagnosed his father with Hyper-thingy and he still didn't know how to help the man!

"We need to go to the hospital!" Naruto stopped sniffling pathetically and shouted his idea.

"We can not, Naruto," Orochimaru disagreed.

"Why not? You're sick, Oro-san. Why won't you go to the hospital?" Kisame-chan asked with a concerned tone, petting Same-chan and giving them celery stalks.

"I'm one of the top Jounin of the village and a Sannin," Orochimaru answered and tried explaining his reason, "if word got out that I'm dying, my enemies will see it as a weakness and they will try to exploit it. They might breach the village's security and try to hurt you, hatchlings. I can not have that."

"But you can't die!" And Naruto proceeded to bawl his eyes out. He really couldn't control his childish urges at most of the times especially when he's upset or feeling a negative emotion.

Naruto couldn't process that idea that Orochimaru's dying. In his future-past, _dying_ and _Orochimaru_ was an impossibility that even Sasuke didn't manage to accomplish because the man was resurrected when the Uchiha killed him. And in this timeline, Naruto wasn't sure if he could do that. Resurrect Orochimaru that is.

(The fact that Naruto was willing to do a Forbidden Jutsu for Orochimaru's sake escaped his mind and Kurama hasn't the mental capacity to point it out. His kit was stressing him out.)

(Time travel's a bitch.)

"Oh, I know!" Naruto immediately stopped crying when an awesome idea popped in his mind— Kisame and Orochimaru was startled out of trying to comfort the child— and he beamed at the two, "why don't we try to find a medic nin that's outside the village and have a _rendes_... _randay_... _randee?_... a secret meeting with them, dattebayo?!"

"We can do that and we're going to join you," Kisame said and Orochimaru was about to disagree when the child added, "we're not going to leave you on your own to cure your sickness. We're your family, Oro-san."

"Uhn!"

Touched and a bit emotionally manipulated by his children, Orochimaru nodded and smiled, "I may know someone outside the village that can help us."

"You do?" Naruto tilted his head, thinking of who his father was talking about but when he came up with nothing, he just waited for the man to answer. 

"Yes," Orochimaru smiled and if Naruto was at his seventeen-year-old version, he would perceive that as scary and his mind would scream at him to _'run-the-hell-away-from-here-Orochimaru's-going-to-kill-everybody-send-help-SOS'_ but as it was, he just smiled back and embraced his father and new brother. "And it's time for us to have a long-awaited chat."

* * *

Senju Tsunade shivered and sneezed. 

"Are you sick, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune asked at her side.

"Am not," the Slug Sannin slurred and chugged a bottle of sake. She took a glance of her cards and at the cards on the table. "Bastards, I win!"

She threw her cards down and at the complaining grumbling of the other players, she knew that what she said was the truth. She cackled madly and took their money with glee. 

Shizune frowned as she stared at the cackling Sannin and her money, "you do not win, Tsunade-sama."

"What do you mean I don't win? I just did!" The blonde woman protested.

"But this is the first time that I saw you win a card game," the black-haired child pointed out. "You have a very bad luck when it comes to gambling."

Tsunade stopped what she's doing, absent-mindedly punching a man when he tried to escape with her money, and processed her ward's words.

_Huh_. That's odd. What Shizune said was true. 

The Slug Sannin let the money down and gulped her drink in one go. Everyone was staring the the wrecked wall the Sannin broke when the man she punched flew at it while she was comprehending what this phenomenon meant.

Since they got out of the village, this was the first time she won a game and in the past, nothing good ever comes out when this happened.

"Pack your bags, Shizune, we're leaving this town," Tsunade hurriedly stood up, instantly sobered up with the realization that shit was about to come to her.

"Huh? Why?" The child inquired and followed the woman out of the casino.

"I have a _very_ bad feeling." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hypertrophic cardiomyopathy (HCM) is a disease in which the heart muscle becomes abnormally thick (hypertrophied). The thickened heart muscle can make it harder for the heart to pump blood— kumareng Google said that. It's a real thing. 
> 
> Just sharing, I don't really have an OTP in this fandom but I liked Sakumo/Oro pairing because all their fics are interesting. I think the closest OTP that I could think of was Naruto/Shikamaru. The dynamic of that pairing was awesome and a lot less toxic compared to NaruSasu fics. I love familial fics, time travel or just pure crack when it comes to this fandom especially when it concerns Kakashi and just you know, him receiving a happy life. 
> 
> THANK YOU EVRIBADI!! 
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down. 
> 
> — Segnor


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Orochimaru, Tsunade and healing— Naruto couldn't comprehend why he's feeling funny while thinking of those words.

There was a spring in Naruto's steps as he trot next to his father, clutching the straps of his backpack in his hand and cheerfully mimicking Kisame as he sang a song that he swore was painfully familiar but he couldn't identify where he heard it from.

_"Yo ho ho, yo ho ho ho~"_ Naruto sang the only part he knew as Kisame proceeded with the next lyrics of the very catchy song.

_"Binkusu no sake wo—"_

**'Wrong anime, kit!'** Kurama whined.

_'Wrong what now?'_ Naruto asked, losing concentration to Kisame's song.

**'Binks no sake is from a different anime! Just sing _Blue Bird_ or better yet, _Silhouette_.'**

_'What're you talking about, dattebayo? Are you sick too, Kurama? You're talking nonsense,'_ the blond Uzumaki was a bit worried because Tou-san's already sick and he couldn't have Kurama getting sick on him too. 

**'Bijuus do not get sick! And I am not talking— you know what? I don't even care anymore. Why am I even bothering?'** And the Bijuu proceeded to sleep, completely ignoring Naruto's curious inquiries as to why he's so grumpy today.

Naruto tried poking the Bijuu at their shared mindscape but gave up when Kurama threw him out of their shared space. He went back to the real world and Kisame was finishing the song, so, Naruto cheered and clapped. 

"Bravo! Kisame-chan, huzzah!" The whiskered happily clapped and tilted his head as he asked curiously, "where did you learn that song?"

"Pirates," the blue skinned child answered, Same-chan purring at his back imitating the tone of the song, "a pirate group once docked at Kiri and I heard them singing that song when I snuck aboard their ship to spy on them. They don't look like pirates though and they have a racoon dog as their pet and a skeleton with an afro as their mascot. _Huh_. What weird pirates they were."

Stars shone in Naruto's eyes in interest and he was about to ask Kisame-chan for more details (ignoring Kurama's sudden yell of **'disclaimer, idiot! Or we'll be sued!'** ) when their father spoke.

"When we arrive at the town we are heading to, I just want to remind you two that you should never stray far away from me or if something bad happen, remember to protect each other, am I clear?" The Snake Sannin asked calmly but there was a glint of worry in his eyes as he surveyed them both for their reactions.

"Yup! If something bad happen, Same-chan and I will take care of Naruto!" And he wielded the big ass sword that was famously known Samehada, while the sword also made his input known with a determined: _"Pyun! Pyun!"_

"And the bad guys should be scared of my seals, 'ttebayo," in an instant, Naruto was wielding ten different seals and posed menacingly as if he was about to throw them.

(Despite Kurama's disagreement that the child should never in a million years practice Fuuinjutsu again, the Bijuu lost his battle when Naruto sniffed tearfully and told him that it was the only thing he could do to protect his precious people because he couldn't use his Ninjustu skills anymore until Kurama finished fixing his incomplete chakra coils.)

(The time when he manage to do a perfect shunshin when he was trying to escape Minato and he first met Fugaku was a complete fluke because when he tried that technique again, his guts almost exploded when his chakra didn't flow correctly throughout his body because of a blocked coil.)

(Afraid that his adorable Jinchuriki would suddenly ignite his insides, he made the child promise to never use Ninjutsu again until Kurama finished healing Naruto's frayed chakra coils. The time travel experience really did leave a mark on Naruto's body and Kurama vowed that he would heal the blond.)

The Snake Sannin seemed satisfied with their reactions and he kneeled down to be at their level, surprising them with a kiss on their foreheads.

"Good. Nothing will ever make me happier more than the thought of you, my little fox and my little shark, safe with each other."

Naruto's chest was filled with warmth at the fact that their father loved them.

(He couldn't understand how he deserved a thing such as this but he wouldn't exchange this for the world.) 

(This is nice.) 

(So nice.) 

"Oh, and you too, Same-chan," the Sannin added and he gave the pet-sword a gentle pat. 

"Pyun~ Pyun~"

* * *

_"Kimi da yo kimi nanda yo~"_ Naruto started the chorus. 

_"Oshiete kureta~"_ Kisame sang the next lyrics.

_"Kurayami mo hikaru nara!"_ The two children belted out and they were about to continue their jamming but Orochimaru interrupted them.

"Hatchlings, we have arrived," and immediately the singing of _Hikaru Nara_ stopped.

**'Fucking finally! I don't think I can continue listening to non-stop opening songs from different anime. I swore to Kami-sama that if I hear another rendition of _Shinzo wa Sasageyo_ , I will go full blown berserker mode. Curse you _Isayama Hajime_ , I still can't get over _Erwin_ 's death til this day. And now, _Hange,_ I—'** Kurama was promptly ignored by Naruto's childish awe at the huge gates of Tanzaku Gai.

It's been three days since they traveled from Konoha to Tanzaku Gai and Naruto was sure to say his farewell to all his friends left at the village.

Saying his goodbye to Tiny-sensei was the easiest (the _smol_ Hatake even heaves a sigh and thanked the heavens that he was about to have a restful week while Naruto and his lot were out of the village. Sakumo-shiro was acting incredibly weird when he told him that they were going to find a cure for his father (the Hatake patriarch has this strange look in his face— like he was about to cry but when Naruto asked why he was looking like that, Kakashi answered that his father was being a love sick idiot, Naruto didn't really understand it but you go Sakumo-shiro! Pursue that love!).

Minato was very surprised when Naruto barged into his and Kushina's date, the blond tackled his parents turned honorary (in Minato's case, _illegally adopted_ ) siblings and told them that they're going on a family vacation and next time, they should totally come with them. Naruto didn't forget Fugaku and Hiashi, who were bailed out of the prison after spending a day there contemplating the shit they've done and promised them that he would bring a souvenir for them (the Uchiha and Hyuuga clan heirs vehemently turned his offer down but Naruto would still do it because why? He's Uzumaki Naruto, no one could really stop him when he put his mind into doing something).

(His farewell to Gai-chan consisted a lot of hugging, a speech about blossoming YOUTH! and a promise for Gai to never leave Tiny-sensei alone or the latter would be lonely because of Naruto's absence. Naruto even promised back that he would let Gai-chan meet Kisame-chan when they got back.)

Taking a peak inside Tanzaku Gai while Orochimaru was filling forms given by the guards stationed outside the village to enter the village, Naruto remembered the first time he was here.

He was in a bit of a melancholy when he though that he was with Ero-sennnin when he first got to see Tanzaku Gai. He felt a pin-prick of hurt when realized that the man was alive at this time but Naruto never got to see him. Was he doing spy work? Writing his first drafts of Icha Icha? Being a peeping tom in women's bathhouses?

Or was he with Nagato in Ame? 

Naruto's not the best when it comes to dates and time, so he wasn't sure what his godfather was doing at this timeline. 

(The chibi Uzumaki didn't know that when he was sleeping from Kushina's Bijuu merging with Kurama, the Toad Sannin visited him at the hospital and proceeded to annoy his gloomy teammate about his not-yet adopted son.)

(He also didn't know that he reason why Jiraiya did not approach him at this time yet despite the Sannin's curiosity and interest at his teammate's son was because he was trying to avoid Orochimaru's revenge prank. He was so certain that Orochi-teme would get him back for sabotaging his food supply when the Snake Sannin went to Kumo for his mission— the mission that let the fateful meeting of Orochimaru and Naruto on the boarder of the Land of Fire.)

It was also a bit ironic that he was with Orochimaru now seeking a medic to cure his heart. He remembered that in the future-past, Orochimaru destroyed Tanzaku Gai at the fight he and his teammate shared when the Snake Sannin approached Tsunade to ask her to heal his mangled hands. 

(Something about Tsunade, Orochimaru and healing poked at Naruto's mind funnily but for the life of him, the child failed to discern the implication of these words.) 

"Let's go," Kisame nodded to himself, ensuring that Same-chan was safely tucked on his back, he held Naruto's hand to let his little brother stay beside him as their father finished their paperworks.

Naruto smiled and adjusted the purple scarf in his neck with his free hand before gently clutching his father's yukata and they walked inside the village. 

The blond Uzumaki wished that the medic nin his Tou-san know would agree heal him because he didn't know what he would do if his father died from heart complications.

If the medic nin didn't agree with healing his Tou-san, Naruto believes that without a doubt, he could use the persuasion skill that Kurama always told him to wield like a powerful weapon.

Afterall, if he _manage_ to make his Baa-chan agree to go back to the village and be the Godaime Hokage at the future-past, who is this medic nin to oppose Naruto's wishes to heal his father? 

* * *

Somewhere down the road, a horrifying shiver ran through Tsunade's spine while her instincts were yelling at her to hide the fuck away from this world.

The Slug Sannin unceremoniously carried her little charge, ignoring Shizune's surprised yelp at her action, and started running the fuck away to that _unknown danger_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M IN MY JAM PEOPLE! I DO NOT OWN NARUTO, ONE PIECE AND SHINGEKI NO KYOJIN (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ 
> 
> I don't know how long it takes from Konoha to Tanzaku Gai so, I just made up a random number and went with it.
> 
> Do some of y'all watch or read Tolkien's works? If you do, please recommend a good Tolkien fic. And oh uhm, recommend some manga or anime too, I'll add it to my list? It would be totally cool if y'all give me fantasy/action/martial arts or sumthin like that. If it's not, well, I like othere genre too. I'm back to re-reading Jujutsu Kaisen because I first read that way back 2019 and I forgot where I left off and daym the anime's getting the recognition it deserves!
> 
> Sorry for not replying to the comments because I'm in the mood to post this! 
> 
> THANK YOU FOR ALL THE HITS, BOOKMARKS, COMMENTS AND KUDOS ☆ω☆ 
> 
> Drink yo water and calm down. 
> 
> — Segnor


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